I think that this statistics is off by a lot.
- There are people who don’t have meaning in their lives, but they don’t miss it, they live an animal existence and they don’t need, don’t want anything else.
- There are people who don’t have meaning in their lives and therefore they don’t have any backbone, don’t have any organizing principle, and they don’t know what’s missing, they only know that they are miserable.
- There are people who don’t have meaning in their lives, so they use some societal meaning, like money to organize their lives, but while they are doing this their soul is starving, and they are finding out that money doesn’t do it for them, however good or bad they are at money.
- And then there are people that know their lives lack meaning, and they spend their time seeking meaning in religion, in science, in relationships, hoping that something will rub off on them.
The lack of meaning, the meaningless of life is called “existential vacuum”, and is underneath most of misery you experience in your life.
Meaning is not inherent in things, meaning is what YOU add to things.
Meaning doesn’t come from the things you do, the people you love, meaning is what you add to the things you do, your relationships.
You can’t fulfill on something that you don’t have.
A meaning is like a mission, like a challenge you give yourself, and then honor it as your life’s meaning.
Seekers, opportunity seekers, happiness seekers, relationship seekers, share one characteristic: they think meaning comes from the outside.
In my coaching practice of about 30 years, I have coached countless people to a meaning they could embrace and rally behind.
It is not an easy task. The coach’s standards, ideals, cannot influence the coaching, or people won’t be able to access their own meaning.
This very morning I had a conversation with a friend/client who has been living without a meaning in his life. And not surprisingly his life experience was being tugged and jerked, and pulled, and forced by everything that happens to him and around him.
I, as a coach, have to listen to what lights him up. Books, quotes, ideas… to guide me to his soul’s yearning.
A person without a meaning is much like an infant: they depend on you, the coach, the friend, the spouse, for nourishment, for meaning, for a validation for their existence… but once you help them see what is already there as a potential meaning, they grab it, like at some point the baby grabs the bottle and then he can feed himself.
Nothing is more rewarding than helping a man find and claim their meaning.
I am not an expert at it, although I am good at it. As an empath I can feel the joy, the happy sigh, the happiness of the soul when certain sentences are said, when certain ideas are spoken of… and it guides me.
I have the most affinity to mission type meanings. Why? Because my meaning is that type.
I have always lived that unless I give what I have to give, what is uniquely mine to give, the world will be a lesser place. So that gets me out of bed, that makes me become better and better equipped to do what I do better and better.
Can I help you with that? Possibly. How? I can do a lot of work with you on my coaching programs, for peanuts. 1
George Bernard Shaw wrote the following sentence in a letter prefacing his book “Man and Superman: a Comedy and Philosophy” which can be used as a guide to living a meaningful, productive and joyful life:
This is the true joy in life, the being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; the being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap; the being a force of Nature instead of a feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy.
George Bernard Shaw
- I don’t do 1-on-1 calls for this purpose, but you can contract me at the same rate for a month, if you have a project, a business issue, etc…
Be prepared to pay a lot… and, of course gain more than what you pay.
The areas I am most experienced in coaching: marketing projects, speaking projects, customer relationships… and I also enjoy coaching it those areas.
- This is another blogger’s interpretation of the quote, from
The following is an elaboration on the four points that George Bernard Shaw makes to finding the true joy in life:
- “Be used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one” – This quote could easily be mistaken to mean that we should have some elaborate goals to save the world and unless we do we are worthless. This is not true. We are children of God who are here to express God’s divinity (as explained in Enlightenment and the Meaning of Life) and we should go about our lives with this in mind. We should infuse everything we do with joy, compassion, peace, love and wisdom. This is the “mighty purpose” which we should recognize.
- “Be thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap” – We should be productive! However, again, this could be misunderstood to mean that we must be busy, busy, busy all day and collapse in exhaustion by nightfall. It’s good to be active and have things to do but realize that we’re divinely productive when we infuse whatever we do, even just conversing with others, with good cheer, goodwill, courage and beauty.
- “Be a force of Nature” – This could be misconstrued to mean that we should run roughshod over people who get in the way of what we want to do. To be a force of Nature (notice that it’s with a capital “N”) is to be a person who is in control of themselves and has a higher perspective on life. This person is mature, wise, serene and joyful and understands the meaning of life.
- Not be “a feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy” – This is a continuation of the previous point and it emphasizes the idea that we need to learn how to control the impulses and desires of our lower self. Specifically we need to stop being petty, immature, greedy, self-centered, possessive, envious and jealous. We need to GROW UP and realize how wonderful life is no matter what our circumstances!