Turning Points: Queen to Play
Lots of movies are based on a script of turning points. Of course: a dramatic turning point is really great story.
But few of the turning points are of any use for the viewer: chances of that exact happening should come to your life are slim.
There is a movie though where the turning point is generated by the heroine, and therefor it is really useful for you.
Our heroine is a cleaning lady on a French island. She cleans rooms in a local hotel, and cleans houses in the afternoons. She is dutiful (Elm), never says no (Centaury), and lonely.
One day, as she cleans a room while the occupants are on the balcony, she sees the couple playing chess and sharing intimate moments where they are equal. They are together, they are doing something together, and they are equal, we could even say, the female is equal to her partner.
She decides that it must be the chess... so when she sees a chess set at one of her private employers, she opens the box... and gets caught.
But the desire has caught her, like a disease. She negotiates a deal, a trade: she wants to learn chess for cleaning the guy's house.
Playing chess is a far cry from her daily activities that require no thinking, but the prize: togetherness, equality, are worth the struggle it takes for her to get through the inevitable barriers to playing well. She needs to expand her mind, she needs to re-evaluate her role in her own life, her world view about herself and about the world.
Her relationship to the people around her shifts with her taking charge of her life and owning her own power, including her relationship with her husband and her daughter.
This is the kind of turning point that you can create for yourself if you manage to have any desire.
If not yet, keep taking your Heaven on Earth in a bottle: the connection calls and the Bach Flower energies (the energies of the Bach Flower Remedies) will work on your diminished desire, and (unless you spend it all on immediate gratification, i.e. addictive behavior) you will get your desire up to the level where this kind of turning point creation will be applicable to you.
Having a desire for companionship and respect (my guess) are not unusual. They are not even high desires.
Feeling lonely is a common complaint I see. But how most people react to it is thoughtless: quick closure now.
Lonely does not equal aloneness, and having a relationship doesn't equal not being lonely. In fact, the most agonizing loneliness happens while with others, while amongst people.
So getting yourself into a relationship so that you are not lonely is plain stupid, and futile, and works against fulfilling the soul's purpose.
Doing the soul's purpose needs you to have enough alone time so you can
- hear what the soul is saying
- look what that means specifically to you
- execute the steps that would put you in the position to actually do the soul's bidding.
My experience is that this is near impossible to do while in a relationship that is about the relationship: the other person will not give you enough room to do this work... G-d forbid you get ahead of them.
What there is to do is distinguish between alone and lonely. Lonely is a feeling, and it probably covers up that you are out of place. That you are wasting your life, wasting your resources, you are off-track, engaged in a mundane life, not worth living.
You have resources, you have a brain, you have eyes, perception, hands, feet... all used to just survive, to live another day.
Just like our French maid (lol) chose to expand herself, you can choose to expand yourself. In a direction that makes the least amount of sense. She didn't decide to learn flower arrangement, cooking, or something that would keep her still in the same social caste she started in. She decided to do a decidedly male path: expand her intellect.
For most of you that is not the direction you would choose to go: I recommend therefor that you do!
Choose to expand your mind. Chess is a great way! Reading is a great way! Joining Toastmasters, a debate team, are great ways.
Get bigger! grow vertically, not horizontally. You are wide enough already... and shallow.