What if a narcissist isn’t what they say? What if it is a developmental glitch?

In my work to cause the next human evolution, I am coming to a startling realization: that humanity line of evolution is moving backwards... back towards the dark ages. Not on the same timeline it has evolved, but on a dead end line... instead of going upwards, it is going downward. 1

One of its symptoms is the growing number of narcissists... But what is Narcissism really?

I listened to Sam Vaknin, a narcissist himself, an expert talk about narcissism.

He says that one needs to be a narcissist to understand the narcissist, and I tend to agree. Except that being an empath also has the curse of being able to feel the urges and feelings of a narcissist... I am sorry to feel it: it's not fun.

This morning I muscle-tested a few people I deal with frequently to see if I can tell the difference through this new information about narcissists.

Some muscle tests were predictably a yes... others were surprisingly a no... Hm.

What if? A theory of a root cause

Then I changed the focus, and started to test a theory of mine.

What if a Narcissist isn't what they say he is, what if narcissism is an affliction where everything is related to one's own self, normal for children of a certain age, but an aberration for older children and adults.

An affliction where others are playing only as toy soldiers in one's own game of war... and one expects them to know what's their role: to obey and do what the One Person says, or commands.

And when you look at narcissism through that filter, there are a lot more people showing signs of aberration, a deviation from norm, a deviation of being a human who can care, who can empathize, who can form healthy relationships.

The self-referential child... might be a misnomer?!

It's been the hardest task of all... expanding the world of the odd self-referential person. It is like teaching a blind person the color blue. There is no inkling over there... not a spark, not any recognition.

They have never seen it, and they can't even see that others don't judge every single thing or event from their impoverished narrow point of view. They can't see that it is possible to be in the world without self-importance. The Self, the Observer, the Watcher, the Higher Self, I am afraid, never developed for these people that got stuck in the stage of a young child.

In one area I myself am stuck there, but only in one area... so I muscle tested myself... what the heck... right. In that one area I am a 2-3 year old. 2

But some of us are a 2-3 year old emotionally, near everywhere. Everything is about us.

I think Narcissism is a protective mechanism taken past the need of protection: and at that point it protects the bearer from becoming a real human... and the inside hell, despite the outside protection, continues, and ravages the individual.

When you can't change your vantage point from which you look at things, easily and really see what is visible from a different vantage point, you are locked into a fixed way of seeing the world, inside which you are fixed, what happened to you is fixed, and what you are entitled you to is fixed...

There is no self-love in narcissism.

There is only a sense that something is off, and a definite feeling of envy of other people who seemingly live a richer life.

Lots of questions can be asked, and I'll attempt to answer them all.

  • If you are a narcissist... can you become a human being ever? Can you accelerate your individual evolution into adulthood? Is there help?
  • Can you be an empath, but not be empathic? Can you be an empath and be a narcissist?

    Why that is a big question? Because a lack of empathy must be there when we are talking about narcissism.

    The question is: can you recover your ability to empathize? Can you recover your ability to see the world as others see it: a big world with everyone having concerns, and nearly nothing is about you, rotates about you?

The fundamental question is: can the direction of evolution be turned upward again?

Footnotes

  1. It seems that the prophecies of the 1960 movie "Time Machine" and the book "Brave New World"... are onto something.
  2. At that particular age, where you got stuck, something happened. It was so traumatic, that you got stuck there, evolutionally speaking.

    Here is my example: I was about three years old when my mother gave birth to a baby girl. The baby girl died 10 days later: she was, just like me, born prematurely. She never came home, I never even saw her. I wasn't taken to the funeral, and I made up a story about it: that I, somehow, killed my little sister.

    I pondered what I did, and decided on anger. I struggled with the delusion that my anger kills people for the next 50-some years... I got stuck at age three...

    Significant incidents involve the birth of another child in most cases, but often involve parental abuse, being taken to the hospital, near death experiences, and such.

    A skilled coach can guess the origin of the childish thinking, the childish processing of the world... ideation it's called, I think.

Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

2 thoughts on “What if a narcissist isn’t what they say? What if it is a developmental glitch?”

  1. Hi Sophie, interesting post. A guy named Grant McFetridge (peakstates.com) looked at why people arrive into the world in varying degrees of consciousness and built a model around trauma and key developmental events in the formation of sperm, egg and developing embryo. One of the highly traumatic events was separation from the placenta, which he and his team found to be a conscious entity. Apparently this sets up a lot of patterns of narcissistic behaviour, since the baby hasn’t had a chance to come to terms with a final separation from the nourisher / protector that the placenta is. Effectively, the baby gets stuck in its own needs. So-called Lotus Birth addresses this by allowing the baby’s connection to the placenta to complete naturally in anywhere from 2-10 days. The placenta dries and shrivels away, with the cord finally disconnecting when the baby is ready to face the world on its own. I haven’t yet met a Lotus baby, but their states of consciousness are supposed to be quite a thing to behold.

  2. Grant Mcfetridge of peakstates.com: personal vibration: 170. Truth value of what he teaches: 7%

    Must be very attractive for people, because people find being responsible for who they are very distasteful. Doing something that really matters: distasteful. It’s all window dressing, decorating, makeup, and such. And b.s. Sorry Paul.

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