Attention is physical. Attention is not mind, not brain, not your eyes.
Seeing something doesn't mean your attention is there.
Hearing something doesn't mean your attention is there.
When you feel something, it doesn't mean your attention is there.
The sight is not in focus, the sound is not in focus, the feeling is not in focus. They kind of show up as noise in the background: the foreground is in your 24/7 tireless washing machine, the mind. You are like the kid sitting in the laundry room washing the different color underwear twirling around in the round window of the machine.
It, the mind, is the center of your attention, the featured entertainment, you never tire of hearing, seeing the same things over and over.
It doesn't make a difference in any way, you catching every move of the mind, but you try.
And while you do, you miss life.
One of the best indicators of how well you'll do in life, is how much time you give your attention to your mind, and how well you can remove it from there, at will.
Of course, you have no idea that you miss life, after all whatever you didn't pay attention to, doesn't exist for you: it was just noise.
But your results will show if you've been missing life.
Even though he has all kinds of good things going for him, movement, sight, sound, he is completely ignoring those as places to live from, he perceives everything through the mind.
When we talk, and he is a regular on my workshops, he is not there. He didn't hear what I asked. So he either answers a previous question, or is in silence.
The mind has a delay of nine seconds before it registers something that was said. If it could leave it alone, it would be like talking on a walkie-talkie, nerve-wrecking, but possible.
But it immediately starts having an opinion of what was said, association, comparison... And while the other talks, the mind doesn't register anything while it's doing its busy work.
I record the calls. If this person takes the time to listen to the call, he can hear that he is off sync, that he is answering a question that was asked before, not the last question. And he can hear that he had no idea he did that. After all, how can you answer a question that you didn't hear?
Attention is directional
Attention is directional. It is a force. It can pull, or it can push. It is active, it can make or break the speaker: they say that the power is in the listening... but it could be said, that the power is in the attention.
What makes one a good listener or a bad listener, is what they do with their attention.
A "pull" listening makes the speaker brilliant, makes the speaker experience no resistance.
A "push" listening makes the speaker feel forced, makes the speaker coerced, makes the speaker stutter, and eventually stop.
Parent figures often have "push" listening... you find yourself feeling wrong around them. You feel that you are not enough, not what they wanted.
Directing Your attention gives you power
Until you learn to wield your attention like you wield a sword, (lots of practice or you hurt!) you'll stay powerless, you'll stay where you are.
The first assignment anyone unconscious (yeah, that's you) needs to practice, (and I mean practice, not just do it once, or twice,) is to observe where their attention is directed to. It's like abs... you don't use them, you don't have them.
You can't catch what you can't see. And you can't move what you can't see.
Until you see where the attention goes, you won't be able to move it.
where attention goes, energy goes
They say: where attention goes, energy goes... but where did that darn attention go? To the thing, or to the mind thinking about the thing?
Until you can tell the difference, you are screwed.
Now, go do the practice. Get good at it. Just find where it's going, don't try to change anything! That will be the next step.
I muscle tested which activator will support you most in this exercise, in this way of being. Surprisingly the Brilliance at Will tested positive. My second bet would be the Astute activator... because you will be able to tell subtle differences... that's astute.