Was I worried? Was I concerned?
I wasn’t. How come?
When you observe yourself, you can see that you are concerned with one thing or another all the time.
You should be this or that. You have to this, you need to that… and you definitely should whatever.
I have severed that connection between myself and “obligations” or concerns years ago when I finally got for myself the Unconditional Love Activator, and “not concerned” was born, a drastic change from who I used to be, always in a knot about stuff that should be.
Now, there is an aspect of this concern, and that is what I really want to write about, and how to set yourself free, able to roam the wide world, instead of being locked into a narrow ditch pattern of life.
I call it the pendulum, and I often call it your frame. Frame is easier for people to get… Pendulum was easier for me because it is spatial… don’t forget that I am an architect.
Let me explain:
I used to live in a world where everything was, for me, about smart or stupid. People were stupid, no doubt about that (lol), and I was alternating between smart and stupid myself.
Life was like a roller coaster, you know the kind that jerks you a lot, and I hated it. It was disappointing when I felt smart… because it bought me no lasting love, and it was disappointing when I was stupid, because I was supposed to be smart… Got it? The lose-lose situation. No matter what you do, you lose.
I first experienced something other than that frame twenty odd years ago. This is what happened: I was on the phone with a teacher of mine. At some point she said: “I know who you are…”
She didn’t like me. We didn’t have a smooth relationship. She didn’t think well of me. So I knew what she meant… whatever it was, I was not, no way in hell!
So, in my head I said: “Hell no, I am not that. There is no way I am going to be anything less than magnificent.”
I never said it out loud. But I heard it. It did come from a deep place, the place where commitments come from, where declarations come from: declarations where you don’t know how, you don’t know when, but you know you’ll make it real.
Did I know what I was talking about?
If you ask me today, 20 years later, if I even know what it means to be magnificent, I’ll tell you: no. I have no idea what it means to be magnificent.
But I can tell you that there hasn’t been a day in those 20 years when this possible way of being, being magnificent, did not guide my actions.
How? I don’t know. I only know that it did… small ways and big ways. Every action.
Now, because magnificent is so far out from smart and stupid… there are hundreds of different ways of being in between… and as I was suddenly allowing “magnificent” to light my path, that magnificent has lit patient, diligent, methodical, kind, integrous, generous, authentic, visionary, curious, integrative, etc. etc. etc… on the plus side, and today I don’t have a simple frame through which to look at myself and my life: I have a multiple frame viewer: I could be stingy, obnoxious, resistant, hesitant, indecisive, bumbling, flailing, etc. on the minus side…
Talk about unstuck. Talk about roaming the wide plains of freedom!
There are no concerns, there are no agendas, not even for winning… not even to be smart (lol), not even to be liked, not even to look good, be right, etc.
I am free. And I write when I have something to say, and I have the opportunity to write.
A brave new world…
Now, what did I do, and what can you learn from this?
- identify your current all encompassing frame
- declare a beingness that is way beyond your current reality, your current understanding, something you know nothing about… not even on a world level…
- use that new beingness to start lighting your way… no need to be that… it’s just the light source.
- Notice that your small concerns melt away in that light.
- If they don’t: you picked something you “know” or would recognize.