The hardest thing, it seems, for any human, is to let go of control.

1526981_10152147561883685_291845534_nJust think how hard it is to let go and pee, when people are, maybe, watching. Falling asleep in a new environment.

But… when you are controlling, your are shrinking. When you let go of control: you are expanding.

There are so many things to control: with your control of the few things you know, your breathing, your thoughts… you take yourself out of life, take yourself to a place, where life dies with your control.

In you, and around you.

There is an exercise they make you do in leadership classes. Two people face each other. One say names of colors, the other’s job is to repeat the word the one says.

After a while they synchronize… then they switch.

Pairs where either of them wants to control… fail. Pairs where both let go… they seem to be one mouth speaking.

Same thing happens when it is movement they mirror. The same couples fail.

Life can’t be controlled, life works best when you let go.


I don’t mean become like a slug… you’ve tried that and it didn’t work.

No, become like a dance… Of course if dance for you is controlling, pick something else… like become like the clouds in the sky.

Why is this important? Because you are disconnected from life, your body, from the Universe through your controlling behavior.

I used to moonlight as a massage therapist. I had one goal in each session: to be present to the other.

You can’t control presence. You actually block your presence, because when you are controlling it is all about you. The controller.

I used to allow curiosity to guide you my hands. Then temperature, then what feels good.

Nothing I already knew.. no ritual, no book-knowledge, no technique, no will.

Allow. My massage sessions were famous and wonderful… except when the client wanted to control me… then it became a struggle… because it is unnatural…

A student of mine wants to learn to release pain… she is a massage therapist, and everyone seems to be in pain.

Of course, they resist life… they resist little aches and pains until they become big aches and pains. They resist feelings they don’t like.

My student asked me what modality I suggested. She sent me a list… I picked, with The Sight, Trager. Had never heard about it, knew nothing about it.

Turns out it is exactly the type of massage I used to do intuitively. No technique, just listening and surrendering.

You can’t do it well without The Sight, without surrendering to The Sight to move your hands.

No technique. Just feeling into it, surrendering to it.

let go let flight happenThe hardest thing you’ll ever do. But when you finally get it, get the hang of it, you’ll be swimming with the sharks, and swimming with the dolphins, and flying with the geese… honking.

The capacities underneath letting go of control are self-trust and trusting others, trusting the Universe. I activate self-trust on the webinars this weekend… Next weekend we are activating something else. With trusting others: you need to buy it individually.

PS: certain cultures are more controlling than others. Certain “modalities” offer control… and rob you of healing or of raising your vibration, because you can’t have both. Healing is allowing the body to heal. Raising your vibration is allowing All-of-it to give you your actions.

It seems that Catholic cultures want codified healing, like Grabovoi’s codes… b.s. if you ask me. But it’s numbers… a great way to feel in control… and get sicker from it.

Geese-in-V-formation-008PPS: the state of non-controlling, as opposed to out of control, is to be like the reed… The reed is not out of control. It has a strong core, so it can trust itself to deal with anything coming at it. It also knows that controlling means breaking. So it goes with the flow. Gracefully, willingly, dancing.

The DNA capacity flexibility is invaluable… No control is a behavior and several capacities are needed to perform… just like anything else in life. Want to dance? Need balance, rhythm, standing on one leg, lifting your leg… etc.

So don’t complain that one activated capacity won’t make you a ballet dancer… or as flexible as reed… Or complain. Complaining is a form of control.

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Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

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