The most generous thing you can ever do…

the strait... the best analogy I could find for distinctionI wrote in the last article that guiding anyone, including yourself with the positive statement is the fastest way to misery… Positive statements, including affirmations, don’t define anything.

The expression “strait and narrow” is brilliant, because it tells it how it is: the strait, as in the Bering Strait… is the key: everything that is NOT land is the strait… the land defines the strait, nothing inside the strait defines it… only its boundary. Same with a river. And same with generosity.

Giving is NOT generous, giving is giving.

In fact, giving can be the most ungenerous thing ever… because mostly giving is a sneaky way to rob the other of their power, of their light.

I can detect that kind of giving from a mile, and refuse to receive, or when I am generous, for some weird reason, I allow the person to give and allow their light to shine bright.

And sometimes someone gives me, and I weep, because their generosity is so obvious, not in the giving, but in the desire for the gift to be accepted, validated, honored. This is rare. And it is the gift. Allowing me the power to allow their light to shine.

I am quite stingy by nature. I am a Virgo and a Forget Thyself… two stingy signs… It used to be ALWAYS about my light shining…

I spent two years distinguishing all the ways generosity isn’t generous… and it was painful to see how ungenerous I was.

I also saw that not using what someone gave you, someone taught you, is probably the worst way to be ungenerous. I am often on the receiving end of praise and adulation by people who trash what I have given them.

So having to say thank you is more often than not, the sign of “land”, the sign of throwing sand in the giver’s eyes, to cover up that you are unwilling for their light to shine.

I had two of these today, the one I published, the other: I am contemplating if I should publish it. The guy gave himself to me. I don’t know how… but I ended up being more when it was over than I was before… And then he thanked me.

In the meantime I am weeping. Not sadness. No, I am moved.

When someone’s light shines, we all get a lot more light. It takes courage, and it takes a big heart.

Now, did this article distinguish the boundaries of generosity? The land surrounding, defining the strait?


Can you help with this? Giving me examples of the land surrounding the strait called “generosity?”

One comes to mind: Christmas giving. Travel gift giving.

The other day Sarah, my shopping companion, gave me a ride to pick up the groceries I paid for but forgot to take… (lol). When we got home, she was beaming. She was the giver, and SHE was beaming… I had never seen her light shine so bright.


russian-superhighway-across-bering-strait-to-alaskaPlease help map out the strait called generosity. It may make a global difference this Christmas… transforming this commercialized opportunity for generosity to opportunity to allow others to shine their light.

And what it will take, from you, is generosity…

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Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

6 thoughts on “The most generous thing you can ever do…”

  1. I’m not sure if this counts as an example , but I’ll give it a shot: I know a guy who would buy everyone drinks and food while out at the bar (great), but I noticed that when that generosity wasn’t returned, particularly, when he didn’t have money, he was unhappy. Is any expectation beyond the desire for someone to receive the gift, LAND? Oh, and I think I have a solid one: Treating your date to dinner & movies, in the obligatory, male dominated cultural sense. As an aside, I’m concerned that this comment will make me look dumb. LOL

  2. In the same way that Spirit wants flying, Spirit wants flowing. Generosity is removing the obstacles to that flow. It the the willingness to provide what is wanted in the moment. Source provides the energy, the generosity is in the allowing, in the stepping aside. It opens up the space.

  3. unfortunately you did exactly the opposite of what I asked people to do… showering us with tree of knowledge. Thank you for illustrating my point. You can ask anyone, and will get the same response: they will have no idea on how to be generous by your definition.

    I am sure you felt really really smart as you wrote this.

  4. This article made me really look. I will attempt to bring examples of land and light.

    1. The other day my daughter made a cake and smoothies (whipped plain yogurt, honey and vanilla). She invited her grandparents for tea. When they came she offered them cake and tea, then later beaming with happiness she poured her yogurt smoothie in the small glasses and offeted it to them. Both of them told her “No thank you”. She ran in to the kitchen with her yogurt in her hands, trying not to cry. The land is that her hard work was rejected by No thank you.

    2. The other day Sophie offered her help with my business. It was such a generous gift…her time, her skills…and I rejected that gift by going in circles talking about stuff that didn’t matter, didn’t apply to anything. I threw sand in her eyes. I didn’t let her light shine. It hurts to see it now.

    3. Two years ago I spent many nights making my children Waldorf dolls for Christmas. My son still sleeps with it. Last night he told me that it’s his favorite gift. He is 9 and plays with cars, guns, legos and yet it’s so touching to see him sleep with the doll I made. He cherishes my gift, he accepted my light.

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