Some capacities, especially the ones that are your main soul correction capacities, are hard to keep on.
What does Source have to say about that?
There are different reasons.
Reason #1: You need more capacities turned on before you can tackle the "big one".
Any capacity dealing with your Dark Side has huge support from the Dark Side, namely the Opponent.
One student is trying to keep on the capacity Generosity. Generosity is the Desire to receive for the sake of sharing... the opposite of Desire for the Self Alone.
Any and every area can be the battle field for this... And this student has it in spades. Every and all areas.
She was attempting to exercise "no judgment", i.e. allowing another's light shine. But she caught that she continued doing that, tearing everyone else's achievement down, after she did judged.
Then she felt bad.
Feeling bad is still Dark Side, it is still about you. 1
So the capacity turned off.
So what can a person do, so she can become someone worth having around, someone who doesn't overshadow other people's light, someone who could be a mother she never had?
Several things, but we are talking about spiritual capacities, so let me stay with the topic. What she can do is ask for capacities that don't "step on the toes" of the Opponent... so she can have energy, clarity, a self, before she tackles the big one. 2
Of course, if you had no capacities beyond what you were born with, and you come to my weekend workshops, I may suggest the big one... because, of course, that is what is most missing.
So did I screw up? Yes, in a way. But then again, on the workshops I work only with some of the people, and who I work with are the people who have already bought some capacities to be activated before.
Reason #2: This particular student, when she decided that she would become a good wife to her good for nothing husband, lost all eight capacities she had turned on before.
Why? Because she turned her back to the Light.
When you say "yes" to the Light, to growing, you are asked to move away, turn away from the Dark.
Anything and everything that makes you limited, makes you small, keeps you hostage is Dark. When you choose it and go back to it, you declare your allegiance. You decided to go to the Dark Side.
How does this work with the Soul Correction?
If your soul correction is "Revealing the Dark Side", instead of revealing, you now live the Dark Side. Your self will exist only in relation to others, your value will only exist in comparison: you'll put others down to build yourself up. Your husband, your children, your in-laws, your neighbors, your customers. You gave up being a tree who grows alone... you made yourself a horizontal beam...
This is true with all Soul Corrections: when you choose to return to the Dark Side, you declared your allegiances, and you lose the Light.
I haven't done this, so I don't have a personal experience, but I am seeing several people going through that now.
Holidays belong to the Dark Side... especially long holidays like Christmas and New Year.
Don't be mistaken: the world is ruled by the Dark Side. And when you willingly match your step to most people's, you are on the Dark Side. You fall in step, fall in harmony with the Dark Side.
Pay attention: I said "match your steps..." You can co-habitate with people on the Dark Side. You can work with people on the Dark Side.
Neither of them means matching your steps. You are you, and they are them.
Only you know when you are matching your steps... and me... from the fact that you lost your spiritual capacities.
And the final question: if you fell off the wagon... dropped the ball... find yourself on the Dark Side... but you still feel that you want to grow... can you still do it?
Yes, but it will be harder the second time around.
Like our example student, you'll have to start with crawling, stepping lightly, so you don't awaken the Opponent.
- Unmatch your steps with the Dark Side's... religion, and such. You can't be religious and be with the Light. Religion, all religion, is Dark Side.
- Get some easier capacities activated, that are not an issue, or at least not a big issue for you to practice.
- And please, make sure you play an avatar state audio in the background...
I have birds covering up my voice sighing on the audio I play. I have to be energetically reminded that I am not my environment! I won't even risk turning the audio off... I see how much pain it would be if I slipped down and would have to build myself up again.
- Every time something is about you, you are doing business with the Dark Side
- Another thing she can do is go deep and see all the things people have said about her when she was little... and see that it was all a lie... That all that lie is the floor on which she is living her life. And then EMBRACE it. All of it. Like I embraced stupid, and am in the process of embracing "Living on borrowed time". I will write another article pretty soon, because that is what another student is dealing with, right now...