Unhappiness is doing things, being busy, trying

busy but not fulfilledRemember, when something isn’t working, there is something you don’t know.

If your life feels empty in spite of all that’s in it, then you need to look at your life and examine it. There is something, a piece of knowledge, is missing… and you are paying the price.

Another saying that really talks to me:

the size of your life can be measured with the size of your projects.

But the most important thing is this: you can be doing things, 24/7, but unless what you are doing leads to accomplishment because it is hard, challenging, needing you to apply yourself, it is not fulfilling, it doesn’t feel like accomplishment.

Quotes from a British Psychological Society survey say: ‘Hard work is satisfying, but only if it suits you.’ I should add: only if it leads you to accomplishment. And accomplishment is psychological… It is a feeling. Personal. Subjective.

Also:

‘The work has to use a person’s strengths otherwise it can be demoralising.’

Can happiness be cultivated?

this is also a cited article…

This question was addressed by Gretchen Rubin who tried to increase her happiness over the course of a year by setting herself specific results that covered, among other areas, marriage, work, leisure, parenthood, friendship, money and so on.

Rubin approached the problem with the method, research and precision of an artful academic and in the end, she argues she really did make herself happier.

Of course, Rubin’s approach is hardly everyone’s cup of tea.

Whatever your means of achieving happiness, I do think unhappiness in all its various forms lurks around every corner, hiding out, waiting for us to fall into its ever-open jaws. In short, unhappiness doesn’t take much effort at all.

Happiness, meanwhile, is hard work. Any happy person could tell you that

The reason people like doing sports is because they can be measuring themselves against something that is bigger than what’s comfortable.

People who watch sports live vicariously through them… but if you look, the fans’ lives are empty. You need to measure yourself against something bigger than what’s comfortable, like watching others play sports.

Simple, hardworking people are happier than you.

Why? Because at the end of the day, they used their body to exhaustion. Or their brains…

flowThe more tired you are at the end of the day, from effort, the happier you are. The more you needed to apply yourself, the harder it was, the happier you are.

I can hear you there saying… ‘oh, OK, then I’ll take on something difficult: becoming a millionaire. I am making 40-50K now, working 80 hours plus a week, 10 months out of 12. But it’s a big project, so I will feel happy, fulfilled, and I won’t have a happy, meaningless life.

Hell no! What you are saying is like saying: I haven’t lifted any weights, maybe ever, but I am going to measure myself against a 300 pound weight… let me drive to the gym.

You have dangerously faulty thinking.
opportunity-is-dressed-in-overalls

What is challenging for you, at this point, is to cause your income to grow it from what YOU DO NOW by 5-10-20 percent. Using the weight lifting example: what is challenging for you is to do instead of 10 reps as you do now, to do 10-15-20 repetitions! Challenging but possible.

Remember, in nature there are no jumps. You need to build up to everything.

Not just in physical and mental strengths… in everything.

  • If you haven’t been reading

Reading a book a week will be a challenge that will be near impossible. I don’t mean reading one book… I mean reading a book a week… every week, rain or shine. 52 books a year. You need to build up to it. To find a time of day, to make it a habit, to increase your comprehension so you’ll enjoy your reading… Schedule cogitation, contemplation in your day about what you read.

Instead read 10 pages a day, every day. When it’s easy, raise it to 15 pages a day… etc.

  • If you haven’t been courageous:

turning life around by summoning courage twice a day when you feel the fear coming on… that will be a challenge that if you do, your life will never be the same, but also you’ll feel like a million bucks.

You need to know what challenge you are prepared to take on, and follow the steps (remember the law of process?)
  1. gain knowledge. read books. watch youtube instruction videos. take a course.
  2. strategize… based on what you read, based on what you learned.
  3. and then… only then: execute. Meaning: DO IT.
I am finding, that you, the person who follows my teachings, you are weak in all three areas.

You may read, but you don’t think. You may think, but don’t read.

Or you read stuff that is too short, too presumptuous to be deep enough to be called knowledge… like articles, even this article.

The knowledge part is the foundation. If you mess it up: you’ll never accomplish anything worth a damn.

The second part, strategizing is just as crucial.

This is where you will be using all the mental faculties and capacities you have gained in your schooling.

trading-on-paperFormal logic, mathematics, physics, geometry.

You missed it in school because it didn’t look important? Well, now it is.

What will be the use now?

Strategy is going through a lot of ‘what if… then’ scenarios, on paper

Why? so you don’t pursue something that is pie in the sky. So you don’t pursue something that you don’t yet have the knowledge to accomplish. Something that you don’t yet have the tools, the agility for.

Without strategy you are like a hiker who goes on a hike in the mountains of Colorado without a map, without a compass, without enough food and water and without cold weather clothing. Dead in the water. Clueless, unprepared, dead.

And then, finally, when you can see, mentally, that you can do it, then start doing it. Step by step, following the strategy you set out for yourself.

Every teacher I have ever listened to (except Tai Lopez) harps on execution.

But what they fail to mention is that

  1. the knowledge they give you is not sufficient for you to take the project to fulfillment
  2. the strategy they give you is not sufficient for you to take the project to fulfillment
  3. when you do try to take actions, it is clear that something is missing. In the worst case you think it’s you… but it’s not always you. There are often holes in the knowledge, holes in the strategy. Or there is no match between the actions and your skill level. Or your intellectual and other intangible capacities are not yet a match to what the program needs.
How do I know?

Because I myself just woke up to the fact that all the stuff I have bought, maybe ever, didn’t really allow me to take action, because 1/ the strategy wasn’t there, 2/ the knowledge wasn’t there. Or 3/ my intellectual capacities were not enough.

90-day-wealth-conditioningA notable exception was the Millionaire Mind Intensive, that left me with the 90-day wealth conditioning program.

It was something I could follow, execute, while my awareness, knowledge, strategy revealed themselves in the process.

Unfortunately I fell off the wagon, when I found out that of the 2000 people from my Millionaire Mind Intensive I was the only person who actually did the 90-day challenge religiously. I have never been able to climb back again, even though it was very effective… and relatively easy.

I have been thinking of creating my own 90-day to become a human being conditioning program… a program that would condition you to be able to really benefit from what I have been giving you.

That would give me a project that I can first research (knowledge) and ponder (strategy), and execute.

The immense benefit of a 90 day conditioning program are the steps are so tiny, the ego that does’t like change doesn’t get all huffy puffy about it.

It is a lot like why the frogs in the pot don’t jump out when the water gets too hot. The increase of the temperature of the pot is so gradual, the frogs don’t notice it. There is no sense of threat.

That is, by the way, the art of dealing with ego… treating the ego like you treat the frogs. Gradually increase the heat.

So, what should you do while you are waiting for me to create the 90-day program?

Get into my challenges. A series of challenges that work on the same principles. They will open your eyes.

Why do you need your eyes open? Because you have been sleepwalking. You have been delusional. And you have been duped by other teachers.

By the time you are through, I’ll be ready with your 90-day conditioning program.

OK. That should be your project… incredibly synergistic with whatever you are doing with me.

The upcoming 5-day challenge, the Fulfillment challenge will handle some strategy aspects of fulfillment, that without you’ll end up not accomplishing. Or a meh experience.

Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar