You put them in water. And then, slowly raise the temperature. So slowly that it is near imperceptible for the frogs. They will not jump out of the pot, because they won’t feel it.
The way you cook frog is the surest way to change.
Wild turns, jumps, dramatic workshops are dramatic, but ineffective.
Most things you want to change are stuck on the genetic level. All the behaviors are lined up neatly, like apples on an apple cart.
So to cause an epigenetic shift, you need to go slow, or the genes will jerk you back to how it was.
Chiropractors know it, good teachers know it… most people have no idea.
In my 26 years in Landmark Education I participated in breakthrough programs that were exciting, but didn’t make a difference… for most people.
From one weekend course I saw dramatic shift possibilities, but I took one thing, instead: that I had the tendency to offer assistance. Even today I have a chest pain remembering. I still have that tendency, but today I see what it is trying to do, and exert control over the behavior.
Was that worth a few hundred bucks?
Well, compared to my dramatic classmates, who “got my life out of it” happy, but then went back to how they were in about three days, my tiny shift of awareness has been worth many thousands of dollars over the years.
Tiny gains in awareness.
And then you start again, either with the same or with a different agenda… and fail again.
Your method belies of your profound misunderstanding of how you work… and how things work.
I am a turtle too.
If you could learn one thing, and one thing only, I’d recommend this: become a turtle. Not flashy, not dramatic, not even visible till the moment of “overnight billionaire”, “overnight success” stage, where every Joe, Dick and Harry will try to emulate the visible part of their success: the 1%.
Now, what if you put years of turtle effort into something that isn’t it?
Well, consider that you’ve become a new human being through the epigenetic shift your effort created.
If you can consider that growth is satisfying, that the journey is the important, and not the destination, they you can say: it was easier to shift myself on this project, because I wasn’t pulled out of my turtle state by the smell of sweet love of success.
What allowed me to be who I am today is the many areas I took to completion in a turtle way.
Architect, structural engineer, seven languages, athlete, competitive swimmer, gymnast, making it in two foreign countries, magazine publisher, coach, spiritual beacon, empath, marketer, energy practitioner, etc. etc..
I know myself as someone who can do anything, and I can trust myself. And if I cannot do it today, I can learn anything and do it well.
Can you say that?
I have had clients and friends that had an accidental fast success in their past, and could not understand why they couldn’t have it again.
It was simple for me see, but not for them.
They never actually did what it takes to be successful. It happened to them.
Just like the lovely night to the woman who was instructed by Dear Abby to pray for rain.
I am sure I have written an article about this woman… but I can’t find it.
Here is the story: this woman writes a letter to Dear Abby:
Dear Abby. The other night I had too much work, and I stayed late in the office. When I was done, it was late. It was raining, and I missed the last bus to take me home. As I was standing pondering what to do, a car pulled over, and a good looking man asked if he could help me.
I never get into the car of strangers, but he was so good looking, and it was raining… so I asked him to give me a ride home.
On the way home we stopped at a bar and had a few drinks. Now, I don’t ever have drinks with strangers, but it was so cold and I was so wet, and he was so nice… and we had such a good time.
When we got to my house, I asked if he wanted to come up. I don’t do that… but we were having such a good time…
Next morning, when I woke up, he was gone. I want to meet him again.
What shall I do, dear Abby?
Dear Abby answered: pray for rain.
Build a track record so you know that you can.
PS: My Playground program is a frog cooking process… little by little you learn… through doing.
All my programs where I did most of the work, where I did most of the talking were really enjoyable… but didn’t cause much.
One of the most dramatic of all my programs was the Level2… with the Pebble process. I loved it. The participants loved it. But when you looked at participants… nothing much changed.
I am making it part of my Playground now… and make the participants practice it in the Partner calls… I’ll report back on the results.
If it works, I’ll retool all my programs to use the Partnering method. More work, but will produce the results.
It literally hurts me in the heart to watch people who can’t get from A to B… who get trapped in the desire trap. Who get trapped in the “I’ll do it for you”. Who get trapped in the “I surely cannot do it”. Who get trapped in the pink colored glass only to be used, and abused by everyone.
If you are already in the Playground: I am happy for you.
If you want all the magic of the “frog” method… We’ll start a new Playground group as soon as we have four people.