The synergy of well-being and coaching…

A-leader-is-best-when-people-barely-know-he-exists-when-his-work-is-done-his-aim-fulfilled-they-will-say-we-did-it-ourselves.-Lao-Tzu-quotesThe arrogant me would say: I had a breakthrough in teaching the most important thing anyone can learn: getting what they want in life as a side-effect, not their whole and only intention.

I have been attempting to teach this for about 30 years.

The truth is that people got there with my help, but did not learn it from me.

I am filled with gratitude... to Tai's program and to my students.

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If I had to write a vibrational review of Tai and his program, I would not have thought that it could cause miracles like this. But the proof of the pudding is in the eating... so far every person who actually did the steps diligently has grown disproportionately to the amount of work it's taken to be in this coaching program.

Disproportionately.

Why am I saying that?

81e68d081796b726e77b21cdab6ca276I have had private clients, I have offered expensive courses and group coaching, and none of these took people, seemingly on their own volition to the recognition that unless they create a context larger than themselves or their lives, fulfillment, enjoyment, and even motivation is going to escape them. I said all that, but no one heard me.

On their own accord, on their own volition. Amazing.

I am planning on exploring the topic deeply what creates a fulfilling life, a meaningful life, a life lived on purpose.

I know lots of people teach that, but I don't think they do a good job: I can't see any people in my sphere who have even scratched the surface...

Instead I get people whose single most dominant emotion is wanting...

lao-tzu-be-content2-500x227As I wrote in my last article, the life that feels smooth and is like a heated butter knife is the life that has enough knowledge, enough distinctions, enough practice to be able to know without thinking, to try without trying, to want without wanting.

I always "want" something. But I want it without wanting...

Instead I have a preference, but life, my work, my efforts will create whatever they will create... and my preference is a direction, not a goal, not something to have, to control, to attain.

It's a preference, but it is a small part of the whole "cone of vision"... a really small part.

And that is the work my students are discovering for themselves... the secret of a meaningful life, the secret of a purpose driven life.

I could not be more proud.

where-are-you-headingOn second thought: I have realized another common characteristic among the students that have turned a new leaf in their growth: they have all spent hours with me tweaking and defining a diet that allowed them to grow.

People who have done the health consultation, but not the 67 step coaching did not reach this milestone.
And people who have been doing the 67 step coaching, but did not get their health numbers up, did not get this same result in their personal evolution.

By the way, the best coaching program is where you, the student do, talk, and the coach does very little... very little talking.

I first heard this 2500 year old Chinese poem by Lao Tzu (Laozi) 25 years ago.

Go to the people
Learn from them
Love them
Start with what they know
Build on what they have
But of the best leaders
When their task is accomplished
Their work is done
The people will remark:
"We have done it ourselves."
~ 2000 Year Old Chinese Poem

At the time this was not possible for me. I wasn't going to learn from anyone. My level of humility was about 10%.

6koctgvxtkk25 years of constant and diligent chiseling away pride and arrogance, my level of humility is at 80%.

I am still having a hard time wrapping my arms around the idea that the student is going to teach me... even though I have learned this past few months a ton from my students... But I have a hunch that my students are starting to say "I have done it myself..."

I am proud of them and I a proud of myself.

It is all in the synergy.

And that is very monumental... given what the goal is: have a group of people who become human beings... to show how it's done.

We are doing it...

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Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

6 thoughts on “The synergy of well-being and coaching…”

  1. This article is beautiful Sophie. I never thought I would experience the level of change that has occurred in these few months of your coaching in the 67 Steps, and your health consultations. Nothing like this EVER happened with the multitude of teachers, gurus, retreats and programs enlisted over the last 10 to 15 years. And life within the change holds a sense of peacefulness, an “it’s-okayness”. The progress IS what it needs to be without urgency or anticipation. No question…the facilitator of the change. I am so grateful for all you have done. You are MY beloved Sophieji.

  2. Sophieji…

    When I look at myself, I see myself as a Mongol mother pulling and straigtening out my children and their limbs… Gentle pulling… totally instinctive, totally gentle.
    It seems to be working, as it worked for the Mongol mothers and their children.
    I am sometimes moved by who I am.

    Everyone says: you have to be able to say, in one sentence, what you are doing… but some things cannot be translated to a sentence like that… so I have a public sentence, and a non-verbal deeply moving sentence for myself.

    I would appreciate if you found a name for me that doesn’t make me sound like one of the Indian gurus…

    When I published my magazine, people lovingly called me Doctor Ruth Sophie… I liked that.

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