It seems that many people have learned a profession they don't like. And many people don't have a profession and are afraid to pick one.
In yesterday's money workshop we had both kinds...
Interestingly there was some commonality in the underlying attitudes.
One attitude was something I could call stingy, but it may not be the right word.
The commonality was: I want certainty BEFORE I'd do anything out of the box.
And it seems that all the people on the call were withholding their power, their energy, their love, their curiosity, the adventurousness by demanding or expecting of the Universe to give them certainty ahead of time.
When I compare that with my attitude, or the attitude of some people who live a life I admire, our attitude of not sparing ourselves stands in sharp contrast to this self-sparing attitude of my students.
I never asked myself, or not really, if it is worth it. The effort, the trouble, the risk... I always considered that I'll make it worth it.
And sometimes I did, and other times I didn't.
Not everything has be worth it right away. Some things become worth it decades later.
I have competed in six sports. All individual. I wasn't good enough in either, but I find it that your ability for self-awareness is nothing or not much unless you are aware where your body parts are, what is your posture, and how wide is your cone of vision... all impossible to get without some kind of serious sporting activity.
In addition to competing, i also sailed, rowed, kayaked, climbed trees, pantomimed, danced on stage, etc...
Without these physical experiences I would have never become the empath I am.
Sometimes we learned one profession but we want to change... and it is not that easy...
Here are two examples: one is my own, the other is a student of mine...
In the end I'll ask for your input... please be generous.
After I came to the USA, I worked as an architect for about 30 months.
First I scoured the help wanted ads, and went on an interview with a prestigious Midtown Manhattan firm. They were impressed with me, my experience, and hired me on the spot with a salary that was four, nearly five times higher than what I made in Israel.
On my way out I passed pictures of their completed projects and realized that this job would have no integrity for me: I would be ashamed to say I was part of those projects. So I went back and told them...
I worked for half of that money for the rest of the 30 months, but at least I had integrity... by that time I learned that without integrity nothing works. Integrity between me and myself.
Then I was fired because I could not lie to cover up some scam... doesn't matter why.
It was time to start something new. I was 40 years old, and penniless. No family, no savings, no government support. -->Click to read footnote 1
I did the skill finding exercise from the What Color Is Your Parachute, and it helped me to find direction: putting ink on paper and communicate.
I decided that publishing magazines is a good match to "putting ink on paper and communicate", so I applied to two local rags, pennysavers, for a job. -->Click to read footnote 2
That is not what I had in mind, that is a skill I had no experience in, but I accepted the positions. You start where you can... I know many CEOs who started in the mail room or as a janitor... so why not. -->Click to read footnote 3
Shall I support her taking that job?
If it had been me: I would not have taken the job.
Taking an advertising sales job, where you go from one store to the next, create relationship with them, help them set up their ad, watch for the results with them... that was closer to "putting ink on paper and communicate" than any "corporate sales", dealing with people who are just doing a job, but don't have any vested interest in the outcome... Just a job.
Can't stand it. Can't stand people who do jobs like that. Orwell's 1984 for me...
My student is shy, and very self-conscious of what people think of her.
What do you think? Can you offer some suggestions?
PS: I do this work, one-on-one, in writing, with select people. The price is $100. Email me if you want to know what are your portable skills. Coaching with voice: $25/15 minutes... Probably 300-400 dollars, if you are good and coachable.
PPS: What holds you back is stinginess. Being stingy is based on false economy. You can't hold onto anything... It's all in a day's work. When the day passes your account empties. Energy you don't use won't be available the next day.
The only non-renewable resource is your time. Unless you make it enrich you, you live an impoverished life. Make your time on earth count... build something, build yourself. That is your job.
- I had one thing I invested in months earlier when I had a temp job: I did a really good job there, and I did it with enthusiasm and energy. That company asked me for 2-3 days work of job every month for the next 6-7 months, and that is how I paid my bills, that is how I could eat. Rice, beans, calves' heart. That was my diet... about two dollars a day, $60 a month.↩
But before I did that, I apprenticed with a printer, designed ads, wrote ads... I learned and practiced the skills I thought were useful for the new field I was attempting to break into. I did it for free. Eight hours a day. Much like college students do... except I didn't do it for the credits, I did it as an investment, to learn a skill.
Since then I learned that Lao Tzu, three thousand years ago, said: Do what's difficult when it's easy. I was jobless... and instead of hanging out, I used the time to add tools to my tool box. I had a direction, and I needed tools so when I get to the place where I do the "publishing" whatever that was, I would have the tools.
Even in those first jobs I volunteered to do work I wasn't paid for. Delivering magazines. Putting the magazines together. Writing Dining Reviews, which taught me an awful lot about using language in a way that people would want to try what I was talking about... the food. lol.↩
- I also met another architect in Germany in 1980, who sold advertising for the Yellow Pages. This is how he sustained himself between architectural assignments... And I remember respecting him for it.↩