I am talking about good stories. I am talking about shows with good or passable actors, good directing… And yet the show is scarcely enjoyable because the character doesn’t fit. the inner world of the character is off… tells a different story.
Like the serial killer in The Fall… more about it later.
I have been pondering this for the past few months when there are less and less stuff to watch, and I have less and less ambition to fill my day with work.
And finally I got it.
In fact some movie director lead me to it. He said: I prefer to let an actor do a character according to his or her inner personality, instead of telling them how to do it.
I completely get that.
To have a person become their character, to shape their personality, one needs to be a Meryl Streep, or a Daniel Day-Lewis… not your garden variety actor who says his lines, makes faces, and then goes back to their lives.
If your character, if your personality is “mildly narcissistic” you won’t be able to be credible as a serial killer, like the guy in the series “The Fall”…
Just like the female detective, Gillian Anderson would not do well in a role of a woman who is not domineering, cold, and unaware.
The character can do a lot more than the actor who plays it.
This is, probably, what “inspires” people’s pretenses. Because if actors can do it, if they can be cast in roles of president, and Secretary of State… you can be too… right?
But you (and probably the actors) confuse reality with your pretenses.
The role (psychologist) and the personality don’t match. The intellect they claim to possess isn’t there.
Now, why am I writing this article? What is my purpose? Is it hateful? Is it hurtful? Or do I have anything useful to teach you?
Good question, and I actually have to look… Because I don’t know if I am feeling my anger or theirs… Muscle test: theirs.
OK, then I can continue:
Authenticity, having a match inside and out, being willing to be your real self in the world, is the key to inner peace and happiness.
Because living a make believe life is pure hell. You know you are faking it. Deep in your soul. You know it.
And you have to wear that mask… Maybe even at home, where your spouse married you for the pretense. In your job, where you were hired and kept for the pretense.
And your children… who you fear would not listen to you if you didn’t pretend.
And they don’t… why? Because people feel the real you, see the pretense you, and despise you, doubt you, distrust you because you are full of crap.
This sentence is worth reading a few times, it is even worth being put on a sticky note… because most of you struggle with an inability to do anything to grow… and this is the reason.
If you pretended that you can read: could you go back to school to learn reading? I doubt it.
Just like I could not go back to study that part of architecture I missed… I was too busy pretending.
When you ask for your combo assessment, I am helping you to take a look at yourself. How you are. And then start seeing where and how you are pretending.
- Pretend to be loving and caring while in fact you have anger, hate brewing in your heart.
- Pretend to be smart while you avoid anything that would test you because you know all the ways you fail to be smart.
Until I decided that fighting being stupid, proving how smart I was was not a good deal, I was really miserable.
It took me a long time. Why? I had no guidance. No one who would keep me to it… And sounding so very smart brought momentary pleasure… although I did see it brought me a lot of hate from others.
Eventually, I remember clearly, I sat on my hands in class so I can’t raise it to blurt out the answer I knew… or ask the smart question I had…
It was the hardest thing for me to do, by the way.
And then I stopped going to class…
And that is all you can do: know what you are managing, and start managing it.
So you can be just a person… and no pretenses.
- For some of you shyness is a pretense.
- For some of you fearfulness is a pretense.
- For some of you being lighthearted and creative is a pretense.
Remember that article where I asked you to comment with three words that best describe you? Those are your main pretenses.
I can’t find the article… so I’ll write the relevant part here: 2
You have invented ways of being as your persona in stressful situations as a child.
- you got into trouble. Your father was going to punish you but you managed to crack a joke, and suddenly he is laughing, not punishing. So you made it your persona to be funny. This is how you make it in life…
- You didn’t have your homework, you didn’t have the answer, but you got into a profound conversation with the teacher, and saved your ass… you took it on as a way to win in life: be profound. Ugh.
- You got into trouble and you got out of it by being independent…
- Your little sister got into trouble and you didn’t… so you decided to be dutiful and never step out of line…
- and on and on and on.
You did that countless time, but according to Landmark Education, at least three times.
- Smart was one of mine.
- Being an f… you to the opinion of the world… I don’t care… this was a second. I still weep when I remember the incident. It is fake… because I still hurt.
- Being able to live on next to nothing… was a reaction to being deprived…
I need to manage these all… and I am doing only a so-so job at at.
To the degree I manage these, to the same degree I have room to grow.
Each is an opportunity to grow. Not through it, but through managing it.
They were and are all pretenses. You are not that.
In fact you are not anything defined.
One could use big words and be popular: you are pure possibility.
And although it is potentially true, it is not true for anyone, including myself.
The truth is: each pretense you consider yourself is an opportunity to use as a springboard to something new and unpredictable, by negating it, by limiting its influence.
So me being smart is an opportunity for growth by saying: I am not necessarily smart… let me look again. Let me not jump the gun.
Me being an f… you is an opportunity I miss the opportunity a lot: actually allowing myself to feel what I feel, and getting real with people. Scary!!!!!
I haven’t gained any handle on living next to nothing… lol. Oh, it is coming.
OK, let’s repeat the comment request as well:
What are three words that best describe you, and your friends, family, co-workers would agree to it?
Just the three words, please, not the stories. In the comment box below.
If you have posted before…post again.
- your vibration 100
your overall IQ including your intelligence 40
the number of spiritual capacities you have 9
your soul correction (your machine) 12-16-1955 Building bridges https://www.yourvibration.com/sc
do you have attachments? no
the level of your health 5%
the level of your cell hydration 4%
your teachable type: evil
- oops, just found it… the old article is here –> https://www.yourvibration.com/4992/asset/