The hardest pull to resist is the pull of your “how” nature. Or what type of activity you rush into… headfirst…

actions-over-wordsThe hardest pull to resist is the pull of your “how” nature. Or what type of activity do you rush into… headfirst… That activity can be four kinds… four conative types, four types of conative actions… reading, planning, action, and execution.

Scientific name for your “how” is Conation. It is innate, and it is NOT changeable.

Regardless… I have been looking at taming my own… I find that it is not tamable. It is what it is.

But I have come to suspect that what you do after you do what your Conation makes you do is when the magic happens.

You see, all people belong to three types. People who make things happen, people who watch things happen, and people who wonder what happened. But all three types will, if you ask them, explain why they did what they did… and it will be all a lie. A big fat lie.

You don’t know why you did it… And that’s the point. Your machine will act without your agreement, and then you have to hold the bag… or do what I am teaching in this article.

OK, let’s see how this works. Don’t let the big words scare you: this, your conation, is a very important distinction, especially if you haven’t produced in life the results you think you are capable of.

You see, this article will teach you how you can become a whole lot smarter, a whole lot more effective, if and when you can see under the hood, under the surface, and then, take control… now consciously.

So come with me, will you?

OK, let’s start with the instinctive, built in tendency to do things. Important things and unimportant things. Your “how” profile…

Your how profile is as important as any other personality traits, like introvert and extrovert… you’ll see.

OK, how dynamics:

Four types:

1. The researcher
2. The systematizer
3. The starter
4. The executer or finisher

Let’s start with 3 and 4: both are doers… but they have the “classic” division of labor: 3 starts things… and never finishes, because new things come up that can be started. Or he runs out of ides. Or he is just not good at it.

4, on the other hand, has rarely any ideas of his own, but is excellent at turning an idea into reality.

Examples: architect is the one who has the idea, the blueprints… but the guy in the field is the one who turns that blueprint into a house…

We’ll come back to these two… because a lot of you lose it in these two: nothing gets done, nothing gets built.

Now, let’s see on the front end, 1 and 2:

The researcher catches the scent, and he reads and her watches videos, and eventually will know about everything about everything. But… has no idea inside the researching mode what to do with it.

The systematizer or planner or organizer, 1 is good where the researcher fails: the systematizer will see how the knowledge can be made a system. The becoming worth a damn factor depends on the work of the systematizer: system is what builds the interlocking Sequoia roots. No system? You have a big head, but no results.

You can see an awful lot of smart people, many with multiple PhD’s… with no results in life.

I even know a PhD who drives a van for a living. Educated underachiever.

Now, you can see that like a table, a person will do best on their own if and when these different how’s are in balance in them…

But none of us have the legs even. And none of us is conscious of it… we just like to do things the way we have always done them… and never get any better at life, at business, at getting things done.

personality-hackerThis article will be an attempt at opening your eyes to how you are, in a manner that you can actually see, that the “call of the wild” so to say, your tendency to do things is like a wild beast… And rare are the people who can tame that beast.

I have seen loads of people fail… including myself.

And today I saw something that can make that predictable, unavoidable failure not so predictable.

Now, before I can go to the second step, I need to make something clear:

Everyone has a mix of all those how’s… You have 20 units of how, distributed in a particular, unique to you way.

I have 20 units. No one has more, no one has less. Why? Because I say so… It is science works… Just like David Hawkins said: your vibration can go from zero to 1000… on a logarithmic scale… it is made up. Because it is only for demonstration purposes.

The how that decided is the executer… by the way. The executer who makes things linear, who makes things visible, who makes the leap from good idea to something tangible.

If that went right over your head: don’t worry, it is the hardest part of the system.

OK, 20 units, distributed…

Like even the most autistic person has one he can interact with…

So, you have 20 units, and each how can have maximum 10 of those 20… so in the worst case you have 10 and 10 in only two hows… and you continually fall over. It’s rare, but it happens.

But more typical is the case that you have one of those in overabundance, and the rest somewhat evenly distributed.

new-12-instinctive-strengthschart-smHere is mine: I am a 4,4,9,3

Not very even… and if you ever wondered why I am not richer… here is your clue.

I have four units of strengths in researching. Which says: I am not very curious. I don’t ask enough questions, I don’t spend enough time going deep into what I want to know.

I have four units of strengths in systemizing… building interlocking roots. On one hand it looks and sound puny… but on the other hand I am not prevented from looking wider. My ability to have a very wide cone of vision is from being somewhat liberal in these two… I can look at things that are unrelated and see the relationship… I can use language in a somewhat unconventional manner… I am relatively good with stories… stories that teach.

If I were stronger in these two strengths, my nose would be closer to what I am studying, and my cone of vision would be filled with it. Not very good for a visionary… which is MY ambition.

sidebar-kolbe3OK, the third… the outlier, the sore thumb, that nine in starting.

Having a nine in starting automatically makes me a jumping jack… thoughtless, and reactive.

Ugh… right?

It also makes for a lot of false starts, energy spent in endeavors that don’t, that won’t pan out.

Unless I notice it, I will follow those whims down the rabbit hole, and waste all my life. But if I can notice it: I can say… oops… and come back to start something else. Most of my life is a lot of starting. Not conducive to success… unless… you’ll see what comes after that unless later.

The last how is the executor: he makes things, he finishes things, he has his hands full… coders, accountants, builders… you tell them what to build and like a machine they do it. No thinking, no looking, no context… My number in this how is a 3… I don’t like it. This is what I hated in being an architect the most.

I suffered. And the work suffered. And my colleagues when I had any, hated me, despised me. Because they had to do that work… I had the glory, they had the work. Haha… I don’t particularly like being hated.

Now, how can you become more balanced, even if your conative energies are distributed very unevenly? Like mine.

I have spent a considerable time and effort in training myself to look before I leap.

energy in each area has a different temperatureI have found that the beast will run away nine times out of ten… Too much effort for very little result.

But… I have also found that most things are correctable.

The first big rush took me to a point where the going got tough, or I saw that the tunnel I dug goes nowhere.

Now, instead of quitting, I now go back to the starting point and do the looking, like I didn’t look… and the second attempt, because of the looking, is always successful. Always.

That made me think… and instead of calling myself names, like I used to (stupid being the nicest of the names… by the way) I considered to surrender to my nature, to my how… and let off steam, and then return, calmer to the starting point and do the looking.

Yes, the how’s energy is a lot like steam… big rush. Excitement. Exhilaration… on the wrong thing.

Maybe this is why Tai says: don’t try to make a living with something you love… go with what you like.

Love is the big rush, the steam… after you run out of the steam, it has nothing to sustain it. Or sustain you.

I LOVE starting things… and thankfully I like going back to the starting point and look and see. See a path, see a direction that is going to work.

And ultimately this is the big f…ing thing I discovered today.

That if you can stay aware, keep your eyes open, then you won’t go all the way into the tunnel you dig, unsuccessful experiments, useless research, building systems for something that will never happen, or creating displays for something that is useless, executing plans that are ill-conceived.

And that is the secret: staying aware, keeping your eyes open, allowing the Observer aspect of you to signal to you when it’s time to go back to the beginning and look.

So what are you looking for looking?

When you go back to the beginning, you need to keep your cone of vision really wide.

You are looking at all of life. You are looking at the four areas of the good life, wealth, health, love and happiness… and who you are in all those areas.

Who you are will be the context. Who you are, what you are about, what you want to accomplish with your life.

Also, what is the bigger, larger thing inside which your life makes sense…

It can be family, community, society, the species. The meaning of your life comes alive when it is looked at inside a relationship to the bigger thing.

My life, without my bigger thing, causing humanity to go to the next level of evolution… has no meaning.

When occasionally I get depressed, that larger thing becomes fuzzy, or impossible, or so what… and my life loses its meaning.

So you go back to your starting point, because your Observer snapped you out of the trance you got yourself into… and you have a chance to look: what is my context? Who am I? What am I about? What do I want to accomplish with my life?

What is the bigger, larger thing inside which my life makes sense, inside which my life has meaning.

And when you see that, the next steps will be steps that build that which you saw… instead of the adrenaline rush of excitement.

You will have rush and you will have contemplation. You will have deliberate action… and you’ll accomplish.

Now, what if you are afraid? Afraid of failing, afraid of action… Or what if you are more interested in having a meaningless good time that making your life matter?

Well, nothing wrong with that. But you will have to explain to me why on earth you spend time on my site…

Oh, it’s exciting… I wish I could transfer the taste of disgust from mouth to mouth… So you get what your effect is on me. lol.

PS: Thanksgiving is a good time to observe… you’ll act out, pristinely, your conative profile… just watch.


PPS: Can you guess what “how” type Walt Disney is talking about? Researcher? Planner? Starter? Finisher? To me it is obvious. You can test your understanding of this whole article by pondering this question.

Here is the quote: In most instances, the driving force behind the action is the mood, the personality, the attitude of the character – or all three. Therefore, the mind is the pilot. We think of things before the body does them.

But it is true for only one of the HOW types… which one? which one will choose thinking before anything else? Definitely not me… NEVER… lol.
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  1. or “practical” according to Tai’s system

Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

6 thoughts on “The hardest pull to resist is the pull of your “how” nature. Or what type of activity you rush into… headfirst…”

  1. This was enthralling to me. Maybe because I see the relevance to my situation. It took me some time to ponder the information and your question. I’m far from positive, but thought maybe the “how” type for Walt Disney’s quote may be the researcher?

  2. it would make a lot of sense. But surprisingly, the researcher doesn’t act, almost as a rule. And the researcher doesn’t think either.
    I muscle tested, and it is the last category: the guy who uses his mind to envision is the one who he is talking about.

    Envisioning does happen in the mind… and the executor or finisher needs to see it in his mind before he can do it.

    And surprisingly a lot of people are weak at this step, no matter how much the “establishment” pushes developing your mind… most people use their mind to do bs. treading water.

    Anyway, thank you for pondering.

    I think I’ll do some more thinking about this… people have no idea how they operate in the world, this is the reason there are so many underachievers… they don’t know how to use what they have.

  3. Thanks Sophie. Very interesting article. I am definitely a professional water treader. Best wishes

  4. I am answering your comment in an article… almost ready.
    And please, pay attention to your urge to condescend to me… That “Best wishes” is your ego asserting its right to be more than who you are saying it to… Clearly indicating that you feel bad…

    How inauthentic is that? You don’t have a good life? Start paying attention to your utterings… they will give it away. Just stopping pretending will make your life a lot better.

    It’s OK to be where you are. It is OK to feel less than a teacher. That is totally normal… Accepting teaching needs that… Otherwise there is no chance to learn from someone.

    Oops, I just measured your vibration… I apologize. It is guaranteed that my communication will not be gotten by you. so maybe someone else who reads this comment will get it for themselves.

    I get it… you’ve been so enamored with the “what” of reading, that you don’t even know that what is missing is a bunch of “how’s”
    Read the next article…

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