Astuteness? Nah, You are making Decisions Emotionally?

Please email me if you find a typo or something unclear. Thank you. Sophie

emotional decisionsI wrote this article about making decisions emotionally back in 2013… and reading it was amazing: I actually now see how far I have come…

OK, here is the original article:

You are not stupid, you are just making your decisions emotionally

‘If you want to live with the masses, think emotionally. If you want to live with the middle class, think positively. If you want live with the world class, think critically.’ –Steve Siebold

I have been impulsive and hasty as long as I can remember. And I have known myself, by my results, stupid, stupid as the stupid does, as long as I remember.

My results in any endeavor, any relationship, and the business of life have been anything but stellar. Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes.

The past 4-5 years I have been paying attention, but bad habits die slowly or never, and I am, for the most part, behaving the same way as I behaved all my life, hasty moves, jumping into conclusions, only to discover moments or days later that I didn’t look before I leaped.

I wish I were flawless, but then I would be useless as a teacher: when you are effortlessly good at something, then you can’t teach it: you have no distinctions in the area of your expertise. Only when you can go, through your own awareness, from bad to good, that you have something useful to offer to the world that wants to follow you.

This is the main issue, by the way, with many of the famed and revered teachers, like Osho or Eckhart Tolle. They are really nice to read, very nurturing, but impossible to follow. Because they never went from where you are to where they are… they somehow found themselves there, using none of their own effort.

paradigmsAnd all the things you can distinguish about the world or paradigm where you already are, all those things are useless for someone who is in a different paradigm: your words will mean what they mean in their paradigm, not yours.

Paradigms are like concentric spheres with one-way mirror walls, much like the dome over his world, in the movie The Truman Show with Jim Carrey. Watch it if you can. You can see the lower paradigm through the one-way mirror, as if there were no dividing wall, but the person in the lower paradigm only sees the mirror and themselves going on forever. This is why sayings coming from a higher paradigms translate to useless wisdom in your paradigm, much like the quotes on those pictures on facebook: meant to inspire, but mean nothing to you, they come from a higher paradigm where they are true, they are just a nice idea in yours. This is the case with the writings of Osho and Eckhart… sound so good, but how do you get there?

This is the exact reason why I use my own examples of passage, even though most people want to follow an enlightened being, someone who has attained, but someone who can’t teach it. I feel way too human for most seekers’ taste.

The mystical, mythical, magical thinking of the masses wants two things from you, if you want to become their teacher:

  1. Prove it to them that they can get to where you are without doing any work. Better yet, do it for them. Some incantations (Christie Marie Sheldon), Law of attraction, some magnets, a prayer, a chakra clearing, Just smile, a blah blah blah, and they will follow you, and throw money at you. I could list the entire arsenal of all the people I have reviewed on this site.
  2. Behave like you are perfect, that you have it all, smile, laugh, sound holy, etc.

I don’t offer either of those, I have flaws, and I am trying to find my way, just like you.

So what do I have to offer that is worth your while to hang out with me?

I have managed to drag myself up from utter misery of an unconscious empath to the level of a conscious empath.

My vibration used to be 35. In 1985 it was 150, today it is above 700, and often as high as 990… not in the past month though.

I have managed to get out of my mind 90% of the time, and use the brain for what it’s for: thinking. Real thinking, not just having thoughts. Thinking to make sound decisions, thinking for planning a course of action, thinking to decide if something is true or false.

I have managed to become more self-aware, and aware of others, the environment, of energies, of trends, the root of issues of students, of a lot of things not very relevant for this article.

awareness and astutenessI am becoming aware that I am still making most of my decisions without thinking. But more importantly, I got really clear in the past few days, that unless you want to just tread water, and think the same unproductive thoughts that you already thought yesterday, you need to do some looking, with awareness, and with no preconceived notions.

This is why I am writing this article, by the way, to share this discovery.

The possibility of changing habits came up last August, after I read the book, The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg. He offers a method of changing habits that I can teach, that I can follow… but it has one ‘shortcoming’ for most people.

Before you can change anything, you need to catch it. Not just the top of the iceberg, you need to be able to see all of it, the motivation, the emotions, the unconscious thoughts, the whole situation that triggers it.

You can’t catch what you can’t see, but you can’t see what you don’t bring conscious awareness to.

Conscious awareness is difficult for people, because awareness is non-judgmental. So, before you can tackle any habit that needs changing, judging from the consequences you don’t want, you need to change the habit of judgmentalness.

Judgment is, for the most part, a systemic judgment. Systemic judgments have two phases, on, and off. Right/wrong, good/bad, pretty/ugly, clever/dull, stupid/smart, high/low, worthy/unworthy, loved/unloved, etc.

All systemic judgments are societal, cultural, and not-intrinsic, non-inherent. They don’t live in the ‘thing’ they talk about, they live in your speaking. All systemic judgments are your enemy if you want to be aware. All systemic judgments are given to you by others. Nothing is inherently bad or wrong, but society taught you to divide the world and people and events to bad and good, and unless you can loosen that fixed way of being, fixed way of compartmentalizing the world, you will never be able to change any habit, because you won’t be able to get to the awareness that you need to actually see and catch what you want to change.

I am working on a new Avatar State activator, ‘non-judgmental.’ I will update this post when it is available.

So far I’ve caught the following about my hasty behavior habit: I don’t want to change. I don’t want to look before I leap.  I should be OK the way I am, no matter what I do! HAVING TO look before I leap is a restriction imposed upon me by others, and others can’t be trusted…

Now, why on earth would I have such unproductive notions? The explanation lies in the Soul-Correction theme I was born with: Forget Thyself. Forget Thyself wants to be the top, the only one, because others can’t be trusted. Only I can be trusted… now, laugh with me, out loud. If it weren’t horrible, it would be funny.

And when you look, all roots of all bad habits can be taken back to the Soul-Correction you were born with. And getting crystal clear about what that is and how you can become conscious of it, manage it so it doesn’t ruin your life, is what we do in the Soul Correction Workshop.

I will make, for myself, a Custom Activator to activate looking first and postponing leaping…  and I am sure, I can taste it, my life will change forever.

The only thing that has stood between me and excellence is this hasty habit. Watch me: I can smell my new life, I can taste it, I can feel it… it is as real to me as if it were already mine.

PS: you need to realize that you are listening from inside a different paradigm, so you’ll get what I say to match your paradigm. There is no escape, you can’t even get glimpses of a higher or just different paradigm unless you get into it. I am showing the path… you need to follow. All the compliments, opinions, judgments you send my way come from your current paradigm: I don’t need opinions, etc. I need you to follow suit.

Catch your judgmentalness, consider that your life defining experience comes from decisions you made from your soul-correction, and unless you learn how it works, no incident, no dianetics process, no process, whatsoever, will get you out out of your misery and into the happiness that is your birthright.

This is a brand new discovery. I just saw it today. I had hunches that it may be so, but never actually saw it.

This is why all the work you have done has produced only meager results.

In the Inner Authority boot camp type workshop we’ll learn to tell emotions apart from feelings, guiding feelings… so your decisions will not come from the past, from other people’s standards, from judgment, they will be a more accurate response to what is real.

Learn to make better decisions
PS: Just for completeness’ sake: feelings are what you feel in your body… Emotions are what you say you feel… the overlap is scarcely more then 10%… astuteness begins at 70% overlap.

So when you think you feel something (NOT what you actually feel, but the words) you are off, and you are not astute.

In addition to that: feelings move: it is their nature to move. Emotions don’t move… they are constant: the words keep them fixed… and this causes you to stay with emotions that have nothing to do with what’s going on… so you see:

You are not stupid, you are just making your decisions emotionally… but you definitely show up in the world quite stupid.

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Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

2 thoughts on “Astuteness? Nah, You are making Decisions Emotionally?”

  1. Thank you, Sophie. Don’t stay flawed just for us, even though it makes you endearing and approachable. Well, your “confessions” do…To be awake and aware and to practice observing our own minds, good stuff. Doable, not easy, not exactly encouraged in modern life. Think outside the blob (ordinary mind).

    You might not be perfect, but you do not seem to be one of those teachers who has fuzzy hypocritical edges where you play out your weaknesses on your students. You seem to keep all your weaknesses to yourself.

    I don’t think all judgements are bad. I know my mind is full of judgements. I appreciate the one that keep me safe. The ones I use to keep make me feel superior are all pretty cheap, or using them that way certainly is. It would be interesting to attempt to live a whole day without habit or reflexive action, to actually decide upon and question each action. I will get out of bed now…I will make coffee, I wil turn on the tv, I will speed to work, etc. I think awareness always involves slowing down into the present moment. To get to the point where Eckhart Tolle says, my purpose right now is to drink this glass of water does sound extreme, but from the perspective of the infinite, all human experience is the same and is ripe with the opportunity for awakening to the enjoyment of experience and to all realities above and below. We live in such a linear fashion, when reality is so stacked like a layer cake. Which way to look to really taste it?

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