There is no such thing as enlightenment… is there?

There is no such THING as enlightenment.

There is moving to and living on the Tree of Life, raising your vibration. But enlightenment?

It is a concept to dupe the gullible billions into striving for enlightenment. Into believing in instant and permanent salvation. Into giving up personal growth and learning… These are ways of thinking, ways of being all OK on the Tree of Knowledge.

Our civilization, the Tree of Knowledge culture is full of ideas that are just simply not true. But they will keep you running in place forever, craving, longing, yearning, and never attaining what you yearn for.

This is why people in courses, ANY courses, don’t do anything in earnest, and don’t attain what they claimed they were going for, because… they weren’t going for it.

No one can give you anything. You can work towards and get most anything, but not without your work.

I could say that I am a myth buster, but being a myth buster is like being a revolutionary: just stirring up dirt, bringing the bottom to top is not useful: all the revolutions in the world resulted in more of the same, no mindsets were shifted.

So that path is not for me.

I prefer to go for the Original Design… going back 7,000 years, going back to the Tree of Life way of living and thinking.

Life comes to people without a manual. In many ways bibles, the Gita, the Koran, scriptures could be manuals to some aspects of life, but they are so full of mysticism, and bull, that they are useless except for the most astute… and their number is in the tens in the world, not even in the hundreds. I know of only one… (Roy Williams)

It doesn’t matter what religion, religion is ‘the opium of the masses’ only helps them to be more delusional that they would be otherwise.

I have been coming to what I see that ‘truth’ is, the manual for life is, gradually, over the past 32 years. Slowly, drop by drop.

No moment of enlightenment, no magic turning point: instead a whole lot of turning points.

A piece just clunk fell into place… the second piece this week, just as important as the first.

There is a saying: jump and the wings will appear.

It is very true for me.

Everything ever reveled itself to me came as a result of me jumping, without a parachute, not knowing where I was going to land.

As I am falling the pieces needed for ‘earth’ to appear… appear.

Just look at my articles this week: all about having a solid core, a self.

But I have been failing to teach anyone how to have a solid core…

Why? I wasn’t sure… until this afternoon.

Some of my students are real slackers. and they suffer, as a result.

I was clear that there has been something I am not seeing, but what?

This afternoon it showed itself to me.

First a heated exchange with a student… then another with another one… and finally the interaction that I needed for clarity:

I am going to quote the whole interaction, so you see and follow what I saw

That guy Tai’s talking about did seminars on real estate, and it was his way of becoming a millionaire.

Investing in skills and knowledge is bound to pay dividends, if only I give it time.

I’ve had a glimpse of it in my piano practice. I’ve learned to play fluently a song that I hadn’t really thought was in my reach. It took me a long time, but I made it.

And there’s an experience of getting the feel for the instrument, being generally more relaxed while playing. I’m getting better at my scales, too, starting to put my heart into them, so that they’re not just scales but music.

Unfortunately, other than that, I’ve been wasteful, spending my time on trifles that won’t bring back much. And they are not like orgasmic either, especially when underneath I feel kind of shitty about myself for not taking up the challenge. They are just random, easy or even mindless things (TV equivalents) that feel somewhat comfortable in the moment. They offer escape.

But very little compared to what directed skill- and knowledge-building can bring me in the long term. And that is the kind of activities that I’ve been investing way too much in. Giving up (almost) everything else for that tiny bit of comfort. For scraps.

That behavior has deep roots in me, it keeps coming back.

(It’s funny how I can take pride in certain things, such investing no money at all in clothes or other trinkets, but break that same principle and not really notice it in other, often more important areas. And I’m the one calling my mother a hypocrite, lol.)

It’s time to grow up and grow out of falling for the illusion that comes with all kinds of (passive) entertainment: Grow out of the idea that the momentary, instant feel-good is a good investment.

It’s simple enough, though probably not easy: just say no to passive and purposeless entertainment, and keep at it. Return to coherence whenever you catch yourself incoherent (piano practice and dancing are useful for that) — get better at it. Keep your long-term/big-picture vision active, by doing the steps regularly.

Building and/or repairing foundations that I can then stand on.

And my answer… I wrote with curse words, but I will make them politically correct for your comfort here:

…what you are seeing is normal. You are trying to hang your hat on a future that you have no interest in. That may or may not happen… so what if you don’t do anything for it.

When I look at myself, what keeps me straight is not what I say I want, the goal, the reward, or whatever.

No, what keeps me straight is who I am. The Self.

And believe it or not, it is wholly invented.
There is no way I am going to be anything less than magnificent

No freaking way… and the core, that Self keeps me straight.

I don’t believe in any future, and I am not going for any result. I don’t care.

Of course I want to be able to make a living, and be reasonably well, but other than that… meh… I don’t care.

But betraying who I am? no freaking way… THAT I will not violate.

Invent a self… or you’ll stay in the gutter… because that is where you are

OK… if you didn’t quite see what I saw from the interaction, what I saw, for the first time, is this:

We are taught, our culture teaches us to gain ambition, motivation, inspiration from a FUTURE we want. Something to HAVE.

And for some people it may even work… though their whole life is poisoned by greed… because wanting is greed.

They say: have a big enough ‘why’… a reason to be in action.

What they are not saying is that it doesn’t work… or doesn’t work well. And even when it does, it leads to a miserable existence.

Yeah.

So when I look at myself, I see that what is giving me my actions is not what I want. Not what I’d like. Not some having… not now and not in the future… not that.

  • I don’t give a flying fig…
  • I simply don’t care enough to have anything. Not weight, not money, not love, not fame, not notoriety. (But judging from your actions, or your inaction, neither do you… you don’t care enough. And that would be good if you had a Self… but you don’t. A Self you could honor.)

What gives me my actions is who I am. And who I am is invented.

I wasn’t born with a ‘who I am’.

Most people think that what I just said is ‘how I am’… and then do all kinds of tests to find out how they are.

You hear what is consistent with your world view!

But I didn’t say ‘how you are‘. I said ‘who you are‘…

But I didn’t say: ‘who will you become?‘ I said ‘who you are…

There is no becoming in the dominion of being. It is from moment to moment. You are either someone in the moment or you aren’t.

Does this mean this ‘who you are’ is a straitjacket?
No.

I said: ‘there is no way I am going to be anything less than magnificent.

And then spent decades being magnificent doing not necessarily magnificent things.

I brought magnificence to life.

To everything I did. But not the choice of things… because ‘who I am’ is not about the choice of things… it is about the person who is doing them or interacting with them.

My ‘who I am’ writes articles, explores the edges of human beingness, vibration and such.

I could bring that same ‘who I am‘ to music, to literature, to acting, to robbing banks, or to running a big business.

I choose to bring it to what I like to do, what interests me, what I see as useful… for now.

But if you don’t have a ‘who I am’ then you are going to be lost… and you are going to be flailing. Going from doing one thing, then two things, and three things… the way you have always done them… shabbily, because you don’t have an organizing principle.

Your Self, your ‘who I am’ is an organizing principle.

So for now who you are is ‘wanting to be liked’, floppy, wanting to have fun, wanting immediate, wanting to be given. That is who you are… That is your organizing principle.

And, it seems, that is what most of humanity’ organizing principle is, following the ‘what are you up to?’ or ‘what do you want?’ model.

But there is nobody home… no person there.

Your organizing principle needs to be invented by you.

And then you need to honor it as your Self. Respect it.

It will be the Self in self-expression. It will be the Self in self-esteem. And in integrity.

And when you don’t… life won’t work… until you return to it and start honoring it again.

It is not easy. Mainly because you want everything given to you. And you have never invented anything.

Maybe fantasies, but this is not fantasy. This is inventing for life who you are going to be. Like I invented to be magnificent. Whatever that means.

The less you know what the word means the more potent it is.

  • Inventing being generous… you have no idea what generous is… so you’ll think it is giving stuff… so it won’t work.
  • Inventing being creative, or smart, or a leader, or anything you know something about won’t be good, because you’ll think it’s a behavior, or a doing, and you won’t fashion your beingness correctly.
  • You could invent being guided by the spirit, if you have no idea what being guided is, what spirit is, so you are innocent.

You need innocence to become a Self. No past. No already knowing. Innocence, like a newborn child.

I have been working on innocence…

…but I still haven’t left the idea behind that I am a Jew and that is where my heart belongs. Everything else I have let go…

How many ideas do you insist on being true? Being you?

So you see, when you invent your self, your ‘who I am’, a period of clearing and cleansing has to take place, or it will be just another abandoned project.

It won’t happen by itself. Your current behavior is in a perfect dance with all the ideas, ideologies, beliefs you entertain as the truth now.

So to be that person you invent, that ‘who I am’ will be in conflict with everything you are now. If it isn’t, then it’s not going to be a solid Self, it is going to be flimsy.

In a series of workshops I will lead the few of you who are willing to invent first, and clean, clear after.

The first session, when you invent yourself is going to be almost free.

It will be both wonderful and horrible, I promise. It will cause a breakdown… but breakdowns are wonderful… because you can see what is in the way.

That is why it will be an ongoing project for the very few who are willing.

I don’t want any impulse buyers. I want you to be prepared… Start trusting your choices, trusting what you invent, or this whole ‘who I am’ process won’t work for you.

Please sign up to this notification list… so I know you want to get the gifts on awareness, the gift of trusting your awareness. If you haven’t been on my email list: be aware that I am also going to send you notifications about new articles, as often as daily. You can unsubscribe any time. But then you won’t get the gifts either…

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PS: I’ll watch who reads who downloads and who fizzled out after filling out this form…
PPS: If you want to email me your thoughts, your ideas for your ‘who I am’, I’d love to hear it.

PPPS: I have an audio recording called ‘Personal Authority‘. What I never said before is that personal authority, and then the Inner Authority, the course I lead after that: they are all based on you having an invented inner core, a ‘who I am’ or it is completely misunderstood.

And without self-trust… ahem… you won’t be able to choose who to be, because you have disappointed yourself so many times.

If you’ll be in the workshop to invent your Self, I’ll activate self-trust as often as it is needed, so you can succeed… if you so INTEND.

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Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

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