Updated: Can your teacher teach you what you want to learn?

positive-deviance“The reasonable man adapts himself to the conditions that surround him… The unreasonable man adapts surrounding conditions to himself… All progress depends on the unreasonable man.”

This post was triggered by me reading a few really good articles… Observing myself I was really clear, that although I enjoyed the articles, it never became knowledge, it stayed information.

Words don’t teach. Speaking only talks to the mind… Real teaching happens NOT when you get stuff with your mind… Transformation doesn’t happen in the mind: transformation happens by taking you out of your mind… All that talking keeps you in the mind. Alas…

Growing up I lived in the shadows of my famous father. He was some kind of genius in the area of economics…

As I was dyslexic, and the public opinion of me was that I was a moron and a failure, he took it on himself to tutor me in my schoolwork, so I can succeed.

His idea of learning was to memorize. I wasn’t willing. I wasn’t able. My whole being rebelled against it… I much preferred to be called a moron to being force-fed.


Hungary is famous for two geese related products: goose liver and white dawn filling… People all over the world fight force-feeding ducks and geese, but they are force-fed ideas and don’t even know it.

He, himself, never memorized anything. He always looked at the big picture and gleaned from it the connections force-fed people never make.

But the problem is that people that can, normally can’t teach it. And people that can’t, can only teach what they learned from others. Unconscious competence doesn’t connect to conscious incompetence: where all teaching must take place.

In order to be taught, you must declare yourself incompetent

In order to be taught, you must declare yourself incompetent, so what you know, right or wrong, doesn’t prevent you from hearing what is being taught. So a teacher must be able to connect to the level where you are placing yourself: conscious incompetence, the level where you know you don’t know.

be unreasonable... be an individualPositive Deviants

People, like my father, never had to go through that level: he tapped into a well of brilliance where it caused him to be instantly unconsciously competent.

There is a genius in our age, Marshall Thurber, who call these people positive deviants. Once they find a positive deviant, it is a long task to take them from unconscious competence to conscious competence… the distance is vast.

positive-deviantsYou cannot teach something you didn’t have to learn. Or not effectively.

My father could not teach me learning… and many people who are effective at the game of life, can’t teach you to follow suit, because they didn’t have to learn it.

I can’t teach you to be an empath. I was always an empath, so I never learned it. And although I have trained myself to be more of an empath, it was more an awakening, an activating process than learning.

It takes a genius to teach effectively. This genius’ most important area of talent is teaching and not doing.

This is why the best sports coaches are not the people that were the best at the sport, in the doing of it; their talent is connecting the incompetence levels with the competence levels, effectively.

When you are looking for a teacher, you have these categories:

  1. a fake, a marketeer. can’t do it, can’t teach it
  2. can do it, can’t teach it
  3. can’t do it well, but can teach it well
  4. can fake doing it… but is completely off… fundamentally off in what causes what (Manifesting teachers, energy healers, etc.)

You want to find #3… they are not flashy. They don’t have a lot of following. They don’t have the signs of personal success. They may even smell like sweat and tears. They don’t have the smooth style of speaking, the mannerisms of the one who has got it…

I, like you, wish this weren’t this difficult. I, like you, wish that someone could teach me the things I need to learn, but wishing won’t do much now, will it?

My learning style is to distinguish it for myself. My learning style is to test it, teach it, test it, teach it… and tweak it, until it works for the most people.

No style of teaching works for everyone. That is not the same with transmitting energies, thank god.

Though, just like in teaching, declaring yourself consciously incompetent increases the effectiveness of the energy products: you stop blocking them when they don’t agree with what you already know.

Remember, what got you where you are is what you know. And what keeps you where you are is what you insist on still knowing.

If you want to go to the next level, you need to disable the knowledge by declaring yourself consciously incompetent.

Hard but not impossible.

And I have to learn to teach better

In this, I have been adding to my favorite program elements that are designed to teach better. To produce the result of learning every step of the way.

In The Playground you learn to go through incidents and memories such that your view changes. Your view is hard to change, by the way. Why? Because you put your view in your mind… and then nothing gets to it. So even when you do stuff that allows a different view to emerge, you still stick to the old stuck view… unless.

In The Playground I give you a script. I ask you to step out of the incident, step out of the memory, and play it like a movie, with actors, with sound, and THEN see what you see, hear what you hear, feel what you feel.

Lately every single Playground participant has either left the movie out, or put themselves into the movie.

If you look at things from the same place, you’ll see the same thing.

And nothing changes. NOT A THING.

If nothing changes… then you’ll remain the same, life will remain the same, and that is not good news.

When Tiger Woods discovered that there was something inferior with the way he was hitting the golf ball, he took a year to unlearn the old way and learn a new way. A whole year… never falling back to the old way… like my participants in the Playground…

So you see, all teaching is co-creative… unless you do things the way I say, you are not doing your part. And you won’t get the results. And I won’t get the results.

And we’ll both feel bad.

PS: Want to get a discussion about how to change your perspective, so your life can change?

I am doing a free webinar tomorrow Wednesday, July 10 at 4 pm my time (New York). All welcome.

Register here

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Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

1 thought on “Updated: Can your teacher teach you what you want to learn?”

  1. Sophie,

    I think you also teach active learning. Learning where we the students are real participants, not just receivers. Sometimes I wish the Activator energies were more effective for me. That’s clearly the lazy moocher in me. This is such an area of resistance for me. I squirm and strategize in an attempt to keep from actually working at something I said I wanted. Ugh. I could puke for 2 reasons: A) From disgust, B.) From real fear of not being able to do thing. Second puke probably a better to live through.

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