What does your pretense do to you and your life?

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I just had a conversation with a long-time student of mine who hasn't been coming to any of my classes, but still follows my teachings..

She bought the Big Bundle of energies... for the second time, So instead of giving her a refund, I opted to adjust her predatory genes, and also her oldest son's.

They both had 10 predatory genes active, and they were both miserable... trying to force life to fit them, instead of gently and naturally fit themselves to life... to reality.

There is, probably, nothing more harmful than that, unless you are a Elon Musk or a Bill Gates... with matching sechel (brains) and matching courage.

Cowardice and high number of predatory genes are a really poor match, and yet that is most of humanity. Self-immolation, Ayn Rand calls it. Eating your own heart out.

Energy not directed toward something constructive is destructive...

It's not an accident that the issue came up in the middle of the Playground. The Playground is a program where I experiment with methodology to see what inner changes a homo sapiens needs to he/she can become a human being. Human being is the next evolutionary stage of humans...

There are no human beings on the planet, even though the expression is used... inaccurately. The evolutionary stage humans, the species are at is called Homo Sapiens.

It seems to me that the most fundamental difference between the evolutionary stages is the number of predatory genes.

Predatory genes are the energy source behind "desire to receive for the self alone"...

Human Being is motivated by "desire to receive for the sake of sharing"... alien to everyone, alien to homo sapiens.

Homo sapiens is closer to the animal kingdom, where the genes, the selfish genes dominate.

You could ask, and you would be right to ask: what about the people who have too few predatory genes? 30% of humanity...

Are they not a proof that too few predatory genes will make you a human being?

It is not that simple... unfortunately. I had zero predatory genes till August 24 of this year, a month ago.

I have found out, watching others with too few predatory genes, we all have other issues, like I have had: not taking care of myself and my needs. Sabotaging myself, immolating myself. Offering myself up for fodder...

I just had a profound, for me, conversation with that student of mine who hasn't done any work with me for a long-long time, 4-5 years?

The woman who I write about in the beginning of this article...

As we were talking, I realized that I had been living a pretense that I was living for other people... but I was not seeing the complete truth.

While I did all the seemingly generous things, I was doing them for myself, my own sake, and mostly only for my sake, for my self immolation. Immolation means self-sacrifice. I sacrifice myself for something I expect to get.

But the world, reality, doesn't know about the deal... so I get nothing, other than a self-image in which I am good... and they, the others, are bad. Ugh... quite disgusting, if you ask me.

It is not generosity, it is still desire to receive for the self alone...

To the degree I own this "desire to receive for the self alone" to the same degree my vibration can rise, and I can make a living, I can maintain friendships, I can make a difference in the world.

I need to own it.

My own personal growth has been a journey to own who I am, how I have been, what I do, what I have done.

Don't think it is easy. It isn't.

To the degree you own those things to the same degree you grow your integrity.

I have a student like that... he hasn't been able to see that there is nothing wrong with being interested in looking good... if you own it.

What is most dangerous is pretense. Why is pretending so bad for you?

When you pretend, your two selves, your real self, who you really are, and who you pretend to be, are too far from each other...

And the result is utter misery. Of course.

If the distance is too big, you really hate yourself...

One of the things that the Playground starts to handle is the reduction of this gap between your precious I and your real self.

When most of your energies are tied up in pretending, posing as that person, the precious "I", you have no energy to do anything useful with your life.

Integrity is a function of the relationship between you and you: your public persona and who you really are, the two selves.

  • In my humble opinion when you have high integrity, you don't go around trying to be liked by everybody. Impress everybody.
  • When you have high integrity then you love yourself, because self-love is a function of integrity.

But integrity is so important, that many things, desirable things depend on it.

  • Performance is a function of integrity. Without Integrity Nothing works.
  • Consistency is also a function of integrity. Without consistency there are only flash in the pan results. Without consistency there is no sustainable growth

“Happiness is a function of accepting what is. Love is a function of communication. Health is a function of participation. Self expression is a function of responsibility.”

OK... enough for today...

Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

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