Category: Original Design – DNA

How you look at a thing makes all the difference

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Sometimes I get up in the morning and then do maintenance stuff on my computer, of play Freecell, because there is nothing that is pressing me to write about.

As soon as I look at myself playing Freecell that it is a process I trust to bring up topics I could write about, within a game, 3-4 minutes, a whole topic emerges.

It was there, it just needed to be called.

Last Saturday I had a tech teacher of mine on my 3-wishes workshop. I invited him, I comped him in, and he came.

I treated him special, and he got to see something about himself that he can now deal with. He saw that his fixed way of being with nearly anything is that he is resentful… while he could be grateful. Continue reading “How you look at a thing makes all the difference”

What makes you should on yourself and others?

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

should racketWhat makes you should on yourself and others? The ‘should racket’, the invisible dynamic: you assume there is agreement, that things should be in a certain way

Joke: Why do violinists put a handkerchief between the violin and their shoulder? So they don’t violin on themselves…

Not many people play the violin, but we all should on ourselves. some more, some less.

I should already know it, I should already do it well

Some people can’t learn… and therefore they are stuck. We could even say: most people.

Let me ask Source how many. 70% of humanity has the affliction, the disease of the mind I highlight in the title of this article, I should already know it, I should already… [fill in the blanks]

Shoulding effectively prevents you from learning, let alone mastering anything. You are afraid to do anything in public, for fear of people finding out that you are not something enough to already be the best. Continue reading “What makes you should on yourself and others?”

Your dark side is your deepest source for joy, contribution

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

I have heard that your dark side is your deepest source of joy, fulfillment, yada yada yada, I have even taught that… but alas, I forgot what I said, I forgot why it’s so.

So in this article I’ll try to remember 🙁 … in my usual meandering way.

OK, first step: I google it:

Your dark side means that you have shadow aspects of yourself that you don’t want to look at and even less you want consciously work with them. Instead of facing your dark side from the place of presence, you ignore and suppress the parts of yourself that you dislike.

I call that ‘Face the Tiger‘… and teach it in the course of the same name. Continue reading “Your dark side is your deepest source for joy, contribution”

Feel powerless? What will it take to become powerful?

I have been observing that someone from Tallin, Estonia, a former Soviet Union country, has been spending time on my site.

And then in yesterday’s email, Vishen Lakhiani from Mind Valley announced a new masterclass: Unconditional Self-Love.

I don’t know what his wife is going to teach on that masterclass, but I know one thing: it will be, most likely, really beautiful, nice, heartwarming, and utterly ineffective. Why?

Answering that why is what this article is about… what they won’t teach you at Mindvalley. Continue reading “Feel powerless? What will it take to become powerful?”

Are 30 day challenges worth doing? Are 66 days better?

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Somehow it seems that 30 days are almost enough to establish a habit… even though other reports say: it takes 66 days.

One of my old students who had not participated in anything I offered for 8 years now, decided to join the Validation Challenge.

The discipline of doing something daily and get daily feedback on how that action worked started to create a miracle.

Some people surrender to discipline, some people welcome it as an accountability device, others continue doing what they always do… which is either doing nothing, or doing something that is based on some misunderstanding. Continue reading “Are 30 day challenges worth doing? Are 66 days better?”

You are like a dog wagged by its tail. The Mind is the tail…

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

You live as an object in a world of objects… an object with a mind, but nevertheless an object.

Your mind serves one purpose only: to live really like a machine, protecting itself, being self-concerned. Because if you are an object in a world of object, then every other object is a threat to you, physically, or otherwise, so you are always concerned with how you look, that you are right, that you dominate and avoid domination, you win and avoid losing, you justify yourself and invalidate others, and desperately scramble to avoid responsibility for anything and everything.

That is the life of an object living in a world of objects.

Your mind also tells you that you have to, you need to, you want to, you should do all the things that will make you look good and make it in this world of objects.

The problem with this setup, other than that it’s miserable, is that you are not ‘designed’ as an object: you are designed to be a person. But other than in labels, 99.99% of humanity behaves like an object, not as a person.

What is the main difference?

A person is not the dog that is wagged by the tail.

WTF are you talking about, Sophie? Continue reading “You are like a dog wagged by its tail. The Mind is the tail…”

Homo Sapiens is a fixing machine…

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

The underlying meaning that causes this rush to fixing is the idea that things are either right or wrong, good or bad.

A back and white way of thinking.

How prevalent this is? Regardless of social status, net worth, 99.99% of humanity lives on the level of black and white value judgment, and even smart ones, like my two coaches, like Bill Gates, like Warren Buffet, (NOT Charlie Munger, by the way) think, judge, and live that way.

This is the only reason that there are two parties… for the members, one is good, and the other is bad.

So there is no wonder that the world is going out in a hand basket.

Humanity, judging from the DNA was meant to be above black and white thinking, but it isn’t… Continue reading “Homo Sapiens is a fixing machine…”

The level of your fear, anxiety, upset, depends on…

The level of your fear, anxiety, upset, and to what degree you get offended depends on…

Also the degree you have to, need to, want to or should do things have things, be things depends on…

also to the degree you feel that other people’s expectations of you are important, should be complied with, measure up to, also depend on…

To the degree you react to your environment, try to be smart, right, agile, win, dominate, avoid domination, or avoid responsibility… to the degree you try to look good… these all depend on…
Continue reading “The level of your fear, anxiety, upset, depends on…”

Seeing sideways… looking sideways… visual field

Look sideways… meaning: see things sideways… not only straight ahead.

This is what Future Self suggested to the three entrepreneurial students on the call and later to me. Continue reading “Seeing sideways… looking sideways… visual field”

What do I do when I feel like I don’t measure up to life?

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Occasionally you need to go back and become a beginner in what you think you already know.

I don’t really know… I only know when I am doing it.

I have, supposedly, got good at tens of things over the decades I have been alive… But my life is showing that good is not good enough.

Maybe in some things I am masterful, but in others I am just good… or somewhat good.

And this is what is going on in my life… and maybe in yours?

So I started with the best motivator: I put a substantial (for me) amount of money on a ‘test’ of getting customers, new customers from Facebook.

The fact that I think of Facebook poorly, the fact that I think Facebook people can’t like me and what I do is immaterial.

I now have invested my money in that, and I’d better earn my money back, or say good bye to it: my opinion doesn’t matter. Continue reading “What do I do when I feel like I don’t measure up to life?”