The tyranny of the pursuit of happiness

More books are sold on happiness than maybe even on dieting... especially because 98% diet books' hidden attraction is happiness.

Weird, eh?

I have read my share of the books on happiness, of all kinds of psychologies, philosophies, and just inane silliness in articles, TED talks, youtube videos...

In my humble opinion no one is willing to shout out that the emperor is naked. that our desire for happiness is what causes this sea of unhappiness we are all swimming in. Continue reading "The tyranny of the pursuit of happiness"

This is, still, my favorite TED talk… Amazing TED talks to enrich your concept of emotions, feelings, and self-image

Here is one... what makes it stand out is the passion, and the using of sound effects... her own voice, really authentic... I really loved it.

But what makes it really my favorite, that my clients and students who have been in a quandary about who they are... are starting to see the importance of recognizing the pattern this TED talk introduces: how you make up a new identity that is wholly inauthentic to you.

I am on a roll... I will be watching, and posting if I find the TED talk useful.

Two things about this coming TED talk: the more views a talk has, the more the talker speaks the common man's language, beliefs, and stuff... words that are inaccurate.

Regardless, this is a good talk. Not excellent, but good, and worth your time.

I always check if my female students will relate to it... and if it is a yes, I'll post it.

This one passed the test... Even if you never got anything I said in The Playground, you'll benefit from this one... so please watch it. It can change your life, and start you on the path to what you always wanted: freedom, easy, power... Continue reading "This is, still, my favorite TED talk… Amazing TED talks to enrich your concept of emotions, feelings, and self-image"

I am starting to change my mind about Jordan Peterson. Here is a 60% truth value video

Yesterday I found a quote that shook me to my core... So I want to start with that. You could say: that quote accurately expresses my attitude about life... and I am moved by that

It is 60% truth value, not because 40% of it is not true, but because it doesn't quite distinguish the path, doesn't look at the invisible dynamics of life it a way, that people can catch themselves as they make themselves miserable...

It is never circumstances, nor other people that make you miserable, it is your inability: lack of distinctions, to see exactly what creates your attitude and behavior.

You can't catch what you can't see! And lack of distinction is the cause of it.

Distinction is the ability to tell two things apart, even if and when they are very similar.

Until you can... and to the degree that you can't... everything is the same for you as everything else... you are a bumbling idiot when it comes to life. Continue reading "I am starting to change my mind about Jordan Peterson. Here is a 60% truth value video"

The bumbling idiot’s guide to living a life worth writing about

"The only thing worth writing about is the human heart in conflict with itself" said William Faulkner. I agree, even though the language, the vocabulary is imprecise.

The "heart" is one self, and the other self is the precious "I", the delusional "I", the lower self.

The conflict, the struggle to make those two selves align, as William Faulkner says, is worth writing about... because it is like a hero's journey.

I call it "soul correction" because I am firmly rooted in Kabbalah's view of life. But it is the same thing: bringing the two selves in harmony so they cause synergy that allows living a life worth writing about.

This pretty much the context for the next quote: "Either write something worth reading (about) or do something worth writing (about)." - Benjamin Franklin. I added the word "about" in brackets for clarity. Continue reading "The bumbling idiot’s guide to living a life worth writing about"

The Michelangelo Method of becoming you

As I said it before, I have a strong affinity to the dramatic... in every area of life. This may be part of my bipolar personality... taking things to the extreme.

I do that with food... I call them experiments, but largely these are experiments taken to the just too much...

And, or course, I pay the price. With my health, mainly.

But... as in everything, there is a silver lining, a benefit, that I would be amiss not to appreciate.

I have discovered almost everything in the area of health this way. Or in the area of training, self or others... or in anything else.

So my latest "fad" thing has been sorghum. I cooked up a huge vat of sorghum seeds with sauteed (fried?) onions and butter... delicious. Continue reading "The Michelangelo Method of becoming you"

Cyber Monday: Get Innocent… Get your emotions activated… or remain dead and deadened… Your choice.

I have been pondering what to offer you for the traditional Black Friday/Cyber week orgy of consumerism.

Yesterday, having several conversations with people, I decided that the best way to bring dead people back to life is to offer them the Second Phase Activators.

You see, when I look at people, they are soooo plagued by negative emotions, and they so hate them, resist them, hide from them, that they have no chance to feel anything uplifting, inspiring, heartwarming... Continue reading "Cyber Monday: Get Innocent… Get your emotions activated… or remain dead and deadened… Your choice."

How to get reasonably clear of your past?

This morning, while I was measuring someone's starting point measurements, I wondered if there was another word for the desire measure. And it is... drumroll: entitlement. The person feels entitled to get from nature, from the universe, from the world those things that are desired without having to earn it, work for it, barter for it, compete for it... just because they are themselves. Knowledge, love, respect, compliments, stuff, money... It is almost always the same number as the lack of humility number, how much you think of yourself as the center of the universe, as it's about you, take things personally.

The higher those two numbers are the less satisfying life becomes, because you always feel cheated.

Every young child thinks that the world, other people, their emotional state and response is centered around them.

So when something happens, and something always happens! they are sure it has something to do with them, that somehow they caused it. Continue reading "How to get reasonably clear of your past?"

The secret of being intelligent and staying intelligent

The secret of being intelligent and staying intelligent

what is a secret?

knowledge
seeing
keeping your head about you

just knowing is enough

next: 3 examples

Feelings, emotions… if you could just feel better! How to increase your emotional intelligence?

We talk about feelings and emotions as if they were the same...

But they aren't... And like with everything, on the current level of humanity we have a really hard time holding it together, and even hope for a life that is bearable.

But with knowledge can come power... and that is what I am offering in this article.

Self-actualization, self-realization means: becoming the best you.

And the definition of good (according to Robert Hartman) is: that which fulfills completely its purpose.

One main area of life where we have been living in a dense fog is feelings.

Continue reading "Feelings, emotions… if you could just feel better! How to increase your emotional intelligence?"

Being judged

We are judged all the time. Justly, unjustly, the feeling of being judged is familiar to all of us... and some of us is bothered and paralyzed by it more than others.

What's painful in being judged is that the judgment contains a kernel of truth (or more) and the other part is the judging themselves: in judging they place themselves above us... simply unbearable to the sensitive Precious "I".

This story is about my very recent "bout" with being judged... and shows what is on the other side of judgment... how to free yourself from it so it doesn't sting quite that much... maybe not even at all.

OK, here we go:

If you've known me for a while, you know that I don't do housework, or really shamefully little. Continue reading "Being judged"