What does positive thinking have to do with learned helplessness? what does belief have to do with it?

Why do I fight positive thinking, why am I trashing it?

This morning I got to a realization: the students that are not making strides, not moving higher on the evolutionary scale are the students that are confusing “there is nothing wrong in reality” with positive thinking.

Positive thinking says: avoid negativity. Turn your back to it. Make up something nice to say about things you don’t like, don’t want.

The French has a saying: The more things change the more things remain the same.

This is a principle: true in every area of life. Continue reading “What does positive thinking have to do with learned helplessness? what does belief have to do with it?”

Moses made the Israelites wander in the desert for 40 years… that is how long it took to change their mindset

Nature or nurture is a big question, even though, in the big picture, it won’t matter.

  • What is part of nature can be changed. In fact it is being changed effectively all the time.
  • What is part of nurture is harder to change, but it’s possible. It just takes more work.

Just the opposite of what you thought, right?

I am a good example for nature being changed: I got smarter than when I started, smarter than my siblings and my parents… through application. High achievers in the world are mostly of this type: born with little or average, worked harder, accomplished more than what they would get if they didn’t grow what they earned.

In my muscle testing the more you were born with the less you think you need to work, the less you want to work on becoming all you can become. Continue reading “Moses made the Israelites wander in the desert for 40 years… that is how long it took to change their mindset”

Signs, God, Revelations, Numerology, Astrology, Dreams, Magical Thinking… are ALL B.S.?

Signs, God, revelations, numerology, astrology, dreams, magical thinking

It’s all invented, it is all some rules or some laws to make sense of what cannot make sense… life, the Universe, this whole thing we were born into.

For a while it makes sense… while the parents and the family surround you, but once you are on your own, once what you do matters beyond the rules of the family, life doesn’t make much sense.

The ego, the part of a human that wants you to be safe, is not comfortable with uncertainty, with not knowing. It is only comfortable when the rules are clear, they work every time, and you know that if you do A you’ll get B.

But life doesn’t seem to have clear cut rules… and the ego is not happy. Continue reading “Signs, God, Revelations, Numerology, Astrology, Dreams, Magical Thinking… are ALL B.S.?”

The empath’s guide to: How to not feel alone, isolated, abandoned, not belonging…

You look around. Everyone seems to have it better than you. They laugh, they hug, they walk hand in hand, kiss… or have friends who like them… but you? If feels like you have no one, no one cares about you, no one responds well to you… You are not getting enough “strokes”… from others.

A “stroke” (in Transactional Analysis) is a unit of social transaction. A hug. A nod. A smile. A hello, a thank you, a “how are you?”, or an f… you…. these are all social transactions. The more strokes you get the less your spine will shrivel up on you…

Continue reading “The empath’s guide to: How to not feel alone, isolated, abandoned, not belonging…”

You can have everything, but not at the same time…

Look how hard I try! Look how good I am!

You can have everything, but not at the same time…

In certain areas of life it is obvious… Like eating sugary stuff and weight loss…

But in this work, the work of causing human evolution, from human to human being, I don’t address many obvious things, because the secret of evolution is in the invisible domain. Continue reading “You can have everything, but not at the same time…”

Focus on the things you can control… but what can you really control?

things you can controlYou can only control what belongs to you… Your thoughts, your feelings, your emotions don’t belong to you. Your actions, your attitude, what you actually heed, what you say… they do belong to you.

They are interestingly difficult to see… they are hidden from your view, overcrowded by noise.

We call these here: invisible dynamics. They are tiny machines, their behavior is predictable, manageable, and their effect on your life are detrimental. Continue reading “Focus on the things you can control… but what can you really control?”

One area where every student of mine is lacking is communication.

One area where every student of mine is lacking is communication. When suddenly they do something that I consider communication, I cry. One of my recent articles brought a furry of communication… but it was a “fluke”, an accident, a one time event.

What is communication, really?

The dictionary says: conveying information. Bah humbug.

The purpose of communication is to get what you want from life, through other people.

Communication is a tool. For the most part the purpose of communication is to get what you want from life, through other people.

If the purpose of life is survival, and survival is more guaranteed if you get what you want, then communication is the most needed tool.

Continue reading “One area where every student of mine is lacking is communication.”

Is it too late for you? Is it too late for you to change?

What do I mean too late? I mean this: The chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken

This saying sounds like the god honest truth, doesn’t it? But when I muscle test, it is only 20% true…

Why is the truth value of something universally accepted as truth?

It is true, because it takes effort and intention and commitment to break bad habits. And we, humans, are not very motivated to change any habit, let alone a habit that gets us pleasure… in another name, payoffs. But when people can see, when people can own that they pay with their lives, a lot more people are interested and are willing to make efforts…

The biggest hindrance is the goodies… What goodies? you ask. Continue reading “Is it too late for you? Is it too late for you to change?”

What are guiding feelings vs. emotions? Are you guided to look away? Run?

I would never have thought of asking this question prior to reading Margoczi’s books, Feelings and Words a few years ago.

The truth value of those books is about 40%… more for reasons of omission than for reasons of false teaching.

I have learned in Landmark Education that regret, remorse, resentment, the “infamous” three R’s are useless, and harmful.

I dare to differ.

  • They may be useless if you are unwilling to take responsibility for what they are signaling.
  • They may be useless or harmful if you make them your mood for life… pretending that you are a victim… you were never a victim, although you may have had abuse, misuse, or failures in your life.

What makes you a victim (also called an effect) is the unwillingness to take responsibility for what belongs to you… Continue reading “What are guiding feelings vs. emotions? Are you guided to look away? Run?”

Am I weak? Are you weak? What is the inside stick? How do you activate it?

Motivation… it is either a stick or a carrot…

And it is either an inside job, or an outside job.

I am more motivated, more nudged on to do a move, to do something, to make a change in behavior by the stick than by the carrot… the inside stick

Most carrots promise you some goodies… goodies you don’t already have, or more of what you already have. But human preference is not in that direction. No matter how trapped you are in desire, wanting, being induced to doing anything for what you want is really rare, unless it is for instant gratification. 1

The stick promises to take something away. Life, goodies, love, self-love, comforting lies about yourself. And that is the main motivation to take action for people. The threat, the “promise” of loss. Continue reading “Am I weak? Are you weak? What is the inside stick? How do you activate it?”