Conceited… where does it come from?

los self-esteem-to conceitConceited

The dictionary meaning is only part of the story (excessively proud of oneself; vain)

The most important part of the story is revealed in relationships. Relationship to others, and relationship to tasks.

When I look, the people who are conceited are delusional… delusional in their relationships to people and things. In comparison.

They compare themselves to others and they are, as a fixed attitude, not as an experience, superior to them. And they compare themselves to things… and they are superior to them, as an attitude, not as an experience. Continue reading “Conceited… where does it come from?”

What makes you who you are today?

The obvious answers are that it is your past that makes you who you are. What happened to you. What was your education, your upbringing, your genes, your environment.

And all that seems to make you who you are today, and if you are anything like the people I deal with, day in and day out, you are not happy with who you are, how you are.

Why? How you are doesn’t get you the life you have always wanted, the accomplishments, the joy, the intimacy, the love, the care you wanted.

Is how you are really who you are? No, not at all. Nobody is. Or nobody is fully authentic.

You are is put together, while who you are is diligently covered up. Continue reading “What makes you who you are today?”

What is the right attitude when being coached or being taught by a teacher?

i-promise-to-teach-you-promise-to-learn.jpg… and by “right” attitude I mean the attitude that gets you what you wanted from life through coaching or learning from a teacher.

Most people don’t.

Why? My guess is an attitude issue… but the attitude issue is caused by something deeper.

I’ll get back to this…What’s underneath the attitude…

But for now let’s see what programs, teachers, coaches do or not do to weed out people who would not be the right match.

I did a training program twice when I was in Landmark Education. The introduction leaders program. Seven months bootcamp. Intense. Hard. Continue reading “What is the right attitude when being coached or being taught by a teacher?”

What is the difference between others’ methods and mine?

What is the difference between most people’s, programs’ approach to helping people, and mine?

I spent the past day studying, listening to several books, articles on how to cause ‘stuff’ and what struck me is that every approach, every method was valuable, except… Except they were fixed.

Once a human finds something that seems to be working, on a small scale, on themselves, for example, they get stuck… now they teach that, and don’t go beyond.

Whether it is about how to get rich, how to conquer fear, how the mind works, how to become the obvious expert, how to make marketing effective, etc… they stop probing deeper, and they teach what they had gotten.

I just listened to an essay on the fallacy of obviousness… on the theory that won the Nobel Prize in economics for Daniel Kahneman. Continue reading “What is the difference between others’ methods and mine?”

Breaking into a new field… how to do it right… or wrong

breaking into a new careerUpdated

It seems that many people are stuck in a profession they don’t like. And also many people don’t have a profession and are afraid to pick one.

Among my students we have both kinds…

Interestingly there is some commonality in the underlying attitudes.

One attitude is something I could call stingy, but it may not be the right word.

The commonality is: I want certainty, guarantees BEFORE I’d do anything. Continue reading “Breaking into a new field… how to do it right… or wrong”

What prevents you from getting what you want?

When things don’t work, there is something that you don’t know.

One of the capacities an architect needs to possess if they want to be a good architect is being able to move their attention at will, and to widen and narrow their field of vision at will.

Interestingly, these are the capacities that are needed for a lot of professions, CPA, business leader, politician, scientist, movie maker, coach, and, although it is not a profession, for someone who wants to get out of the morass of the human condition, and onto the vertical plane of clarity, joy, fulfillment.

I won’t explain why you need these capacities for the professions although I could.

Because the business I am in is taking people to the vertical plane, so I am interested in people practicing, using these capacities.

Enlightenment’ is the word other people use for what I am attempting to do here. Continue reading “What prevents you from getting what you want?”

How many balls, ideas, projects can you keep in the air?

One of the measures in my Starting Point Measurements is how many bits of information, how many balls you can keep in the air at the same time.

Most people can only keep one ball, reliably, in the air. The moment something better, exciting shows up, they drop it… If they start juggling two,they drop both off…

Off course I am not talking about juggling, I am talking about ideas, concepts, distinctions, projects… the kind you hold in your head.

The work we need to do to untangle the tangled wires of our emotions, the 13th, the 14th, and the 15th floor, needs you to be able to see and hold more than one ball in the air.

Even just managing your life to become a successful life, as I suggested, managing it like a business, needs you to juggle quite a few things, and not drop any. If you ARE in business, and it’s not as successful and as interesting as you hoped it was going to be, this is the reason: you drop the balls. Continue reading “How many balls, ideas, projects can you keep in the air?”

Let’s look at your life as a business, shall we?

One of the most impactful 10-week seminars I ever did with Landmark Education asked the participants to look at their lives as a business. Me, Inc.

At that point in my life I was better, much better at business than at life… and maybe, if you look closely, I still am.

I am going to ask you the same thing Landmark asked us: consider your life a business. If you are suddenly experiencing an oh oh moment, or an ugh moment, you are not alone.

Almost everyone I know is guilty of misusing their assets, wasting them, and not paying any attention at the bottom line… so this will be a useful article, if you can just get over yourself, and get curious… and into learning mode.

Ready? No? Then come back later…

‘Your business is kind of like sex. If you’re not enjoying it, you’re probably not doing it right.’ ~ Bill Maher

Continue reading “Let’s look at your life as a business, shall we?”

Beyond brain health: What robs you of the ability to make astute decisions?

Astute, astuteness has a bad reputation… so do the words: selling, ambitious… or taking care of yourself. But it is unjust, in fact it is against Life.

But, unfortunately, we live in an age where being selfless seems like a virtue… but it isn’t a virtue, it is imposed upon us.

It is stupid and a learned ‘value’…

The best people in the world are selfish…

Selfish… meaning: they take care of themselves… instead of hoping that others will be selfless and take care of them. And then they can contribute… from being well and being taken care of.

No matter how many times people understand, on airplanes, that when the oxygen masks are dropped at them, they should put on their own first… and then assist others… Because they see it there, but the ability to see it everywhere would require a wider cone of vision than they have… Take care of yourself first doesn’t live like a distinction, it lives as an example that is true on airplanes. Continue reading “Beyond brain health: What robs you of the ability to make astute decisions?”

Your brain, how smart you think you are, and sesame oil

remove plaque from your brainOK, I am going to share something new, something risque, something that flies in the face of all medical science and research, but Source is adamant that it is true.

When back in August (2019) I felt I was dying, my health numbers were horrible.

  1. One of the problems was that my arteries were clogged with plaque, 80%, in fact.
  2. The second problem was that my brain was clogged with plaque…30% clogged.
  3. And the third problem, as it turned out later, was that my heart was too weak to pump all that life giving blood. My heart operated at 1%… oops.

Continue reading “Your brain, how smart you think you are, and sesame oil”