Stay Open In The Pain. Experience it with your eyes open

Yehuda Berg says: Our spiritual work is to grow more connected to others around us. Our obstacle to building bridges to other people is stored hurt. Perceived or real... When we don't resolve conflicts in our relationships, our lives can't move forward.

Today, tell your boyfriend or boss or brother exactly what you want, what you feel, what you think. You are going to worry about what they will say or think. And honestly, that's the work. Just expose yourself and be vulnerable. Ask the Light to give you the strength to stay open in the pain.

Your soul will love you for having the courage to speak up.

You see, pain is inevitable in life. No matter where or when you were born, your financial situation, your family situation, whether you are fat or thin, sick or healthy, loved or despised... pain is inevitable.

Mind you, suffering is optional... and while it is true, this is not what this blogpost is about.

You see, I just hung up on skype with a friend of mine from Architecture School, Panni. We went to architecture school together is Budapest, and we got reunited about 3-4 years ago. We now speak once or twice a week on skype, with camera. It is the most intimate media every, it is like we are sitting at her kitchen table and drink tea or coffee and talk. Continue reading "Stay Open In The Pain. Experience it with your eyes open"

Who am I and what gives me the right to write about Kabbalah

kabbalahchick is Sophie Benshitta, aka Maven SophieGood question, right? You were just about asking that... Gotcha!

OK, simple question, simple answer.

First I tell you what I am not:

  • I am not a Kabbalist. Kabbalists study, practice, and teach Kabbalah full time, for many many years. It could be even said that being a Kabbalist is like an insider... you need to be appointed.
  • I am not a teacher of Kabbalah
  • I am not a guru
  • I am not someone who knows a lot about Kabbalah but doesn't live it.

OK, then what am I? Continue reading "Who am I and what gives me the right to write about Kabbalah"

Kabbalahchick hello post

overcoming scarcity mentality
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scarcity psychology definitionWelcome to my Kabbalahchick blog.

When I say, hello world, I mean the 1%. Where you and I locate ourselves, what you and I consider the whole world. the visible, the tangible, the perceivable, the measurable, the world of scarcity and therefor the world of scarcity thinking, scarcity mindset.

Kabbalah says that this world, the world of matter, the world of thoughts and words, is only 1% of all reality. The rest, the 99% reality is the world of unlimited possibilities, the world of unending fulfillment, light, and pleasure. Much like the Christian bible describes heaven.

In the 1%, the world of scarcity, human beings live in scarcity thinking. Some people seem to be different: they treat the world as their oyster, and lo and behold, the world complies.

In this blog we are (you and I) will explore what it takes to receive more of what is coming to us, more light, more fulfillment, more pleasure, lasting and deeply satisfying... not like the pleasure of a candy bar or a glee of winning an argument. 1

I would like to cause a conversation, a dialog, where you, the reader is a participant.

Internet Marketing Beginnings

I had an inspiration this morning: I woke up early. I made myself a cup of tea, went back to bed, and read a little.

About an hour later I woke up from a dream of writing THIS article. Here it is, just the way it came to me in my dream:

Each great thing that was ever built started with something that had the greatness, as a potential only.

Most didn't look like the start of something great. Many times it was a comedy of errors and their correction that took someone to something big.

But, you say, we are always told to create with the big picture in mind... Oh yes, that one. I know that well. The misunderstanding of that notion has robbed me of many successes...

The misunderstanding of that principle has rendered me indecisive, unresponsive, tentative, or jumping from one sure thing to another.

Imagine if the tree thought that every seed it is producing must become a big tree... it would be so afraid of living, it would start to shrink and refuse to go to seed. The prospect of so many wasted seeds would kill the tree's aliveness and creativity.

No, greatness is a potential, dormant in every little seed, and with enough great little seeds produced, one of them may become a big tree...

Let's look at MY story.

Back in 1988 I found myself unemployed from architecture, and unemployable at the same time... don't ask me why, I won't tell.

I was spending quite a few months depressed, going to self help programs, 12-step, Werner Erhard and Associates, etc. ... barely having 3-day worth of work a month to live on.

I couldn't think of anything to do... I was too entrenched in being an architect. At some point, I did an exercise from the "What Color Is Your Parachute" and found that what I wanted to do, that caused me pleasure, is "put ink on paper and communicate."

I took it literally at the time, and thought advertising or publishing.

I didn't know much of either.

I went and apprenticed (free) with a small printer for a while, and learned some stuff, bought a letter press with some letters, wrote advertising in mail order magazines... to sell some pyramid schemes... and then when I really needed some money to earn, I wrote a letter to the two throw-away magazines in my area, asking if they had a job opening for publisher's apprentice.

One of them called and said that such a job didn't exist but I could start selling advertising. No "draw" (salary), only commission. Does that put me closer to publishing, I asked, and the guy said yes. I took the job.

I was trained by another salesperson. We visited a few stores in my town--typical advertisers in that paper. We sold 5 small ads that day. I say "we", but I think it was her. That day completed my training. Next day I walked back to the business area of my little town, and found that by the time I got there, the training salesperson had driven there and sold them, or attempted to. I had no wheels, and soon I had no hope.

I called the other magazine, and bragged that I had sold 7 ads my first week for their competitor... they were impressed. They gave me a 200 dollar advance, and a beat up car with a gas card.

I worked my butt off, sold ads, delivered magazines, partook in every office meeting, went to the printer, went to the typesetter, collected monies... two months later, I was put in charge of designing the ads and laying out the magazine. Two more months later I was offered a partnership in the magazine. Still, my best week I made $400... I didn't have many good weeks.

I worked 20 hours a day 7 days a week... I was bossy, I was certain, I was "dynamic", I was disrespectful... 5 months later I was offered the choice to resign, or... it was blackmail. I resigned. No-brainer.
Continue reading "Internet Marketing Beginnings"

Do You Think You Can Tell WHAT You See?

Most of us are sure we can. We make decisions based on what we see, and our decisions and actions take us to live the life we live.

Most of us live a life of quiet desperation. It was true at the turn of the last century, and it is true now.

There was a discipline and coaching paradigm I studied and used about 9 years ago. It is based on axiology, the Nobel Prize nominated work of Robert Hartman.

Axiology is the study of value or quality. It is the science that deals with what is good and what is not. Beyond and independent of subjective judgment.

The test (Value Profile) we ran in axiology had 4 parameters by which we could map out the potential for success of any individual.

One of them relates to the title. The parameter is called "clarity".
Continue reading "Do You Think You Can Tell WHAT You See?"

What is “Natural Growth” and how to Accomplish it, Spiritually, and in Business

Most of the people I know are either stagnating because they don't put themselves in a situation where they need to grow, or they put themselves in the courses and seminars and coaching programs to grow, but they don't grow because ...

Well, what comes after that because is what this article is about.

I was in Landmark Education for 20 years, and I went from seminar to seminar, from course to course, from training program to training program.

In the past three years I probably have done 20 programs, seminars, coaching programs... But only 3 in the past year. What happened?

Good question. I grew.

Very much the way you grow a muscle (especially if you are a body builder), one day you use/overuse a muscle, the next day you allow it to rest, and then do it again.

People that follow the pattern I followed for the 22 years leading up to this year, when I actually grew, actually NEVER grow. They use seminars as a way to avoid actually growing. I was guilty of this, myself. Secretly, in my heart, I knew that my parents were right, that no matter what I did, I would not amount to anything.
Continue reading "What is “Natural Growth” and how to Accomplish it, Spiritually, and in Business"

Did Your Personality Get Put Together vs. You Were Born That Way?

I got a thank you note today. I get quite a few of those, I must admit.

They are a great way for me to track how the methodologies and principles I use in my teaching work. I mean, how effective I am, how effective the methods are. They track my ability to make a difference in the world. (Someone please remind me to write about how I view my making a difference... OK?)

This note reads

Today was a huge success. I did not even recognize myself. I was attempting to have a conversation with my sister when she became extremely aggressive upon trying to control me and failing. She was in my face yelling and pacing around in circles. I remained calm and did not attempt to defend myself as the lies flew at me. I was able to stick to the subject and not accuse. At this point her husband jumped in and tried to intimidate me, pointing his finger in my face and yelling. They both looked like mad men ganging up on me. I did not raise my voice or get emotional. This is the first time in my life I had no fear in a confrontational situation and it felt GREAT! To be honest I think it frightened my sister & her husband. They did not know what to think of me, I have had many weaknesses in the past but now I am strong.

Continue reading "Did Your Personality Get Put Together vs. You Were Born That Way?"

Who Were My Teachers in Transformation and Mindset… ?

Well, this could be a real long article, even a book.

I won't go there! writing a book is way too long for my ADHD personality.

But there is one teacher, who I admire, Colin Wilson (of "Outsider" and "The Mind Parasite" fame, who wrote a book, "The Books In My Life" where he strung about 15 essays into a book, and I learned more from the writers he speaks of than I would have learned, had I read the original books. Continue reading "Who Were My Teachers in Transformation and Mindset… ?"

Are You A Knucklehead?

Hey, when you are being a knucklehead... does it mean, you ARE a knucklehead? Or you are just doing the only exercise most people do: jumping into conclusions.

Listen if you can recognize yourself in these stories:

A lot of my clients find themselves in a trap...

For example, they make a mistake. They are frustrated. Or they are scared. Or they are angry. Or they are devastated. Even suicidal.

They say to themselves: Here I go again!... I am never going to get it right! I better give up while I am ahead! I am stupid! I am a loser! and on and on and on I could go with the examples how people abuse themselves.

Continue reading "Are You A Knucklehead?"

Will You Succeed or Will You Fail in Internet Marketing or pretty much any other endeavor?

When you ask people what made them who they are today, invariably all of them answer a version of the same thing: The past.

How they express this varies: my parents, my schooling, what I have been doing, my genes, etc. etc. but all in all, they all mean the same: what makes me who I am today is the past.

If that were true, that would be bad news, really.

Imagine that it is true. Now see yourself trying to be successful online. Given your track record, and your genes, and your past behavior, how much chance do you have for success?

I'd love to say zero, but it would be unfair to many of you. So instead, I answer it in a way that applies to all of you:

The same as yesterday. Or a year ago...

Now, that is a total bummer, isn't it? Continue reading "Will You Succeed or Will You Fail in Internet Marketing or pretty much any other endeavor?"