Astuteness? Nah, You are making Decisions Emotionally?

emotional decisionsI wrote this article about making decisions emotionally back in 2013… and reading it was amazing: I actually now see how far I have come…

OK, here is the original article:

You are not stupid, you are just making your decisions emotionally

‘If you want to live with the masses, think emotionally. If you want to live with the middle class, think positively. If you want live with the world class, think critically.’ –Steve Siebold

I have been impulsive and hasty as long as I can remember. And I have known myself, by my results, stupid, stupid as the stupid does, as long as I remember.

My results in any endeavor, any relationship, and the business of life have been anything but stellar. Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes.

The past 4-5 years I have been paying attention, but bad habits die slowly or never, and I am, for the most part, behaving the same way as I behaved all my life, hasty moves, jumping into conclusions, only to discover moments or days later that I didn’t look before I leaped.

I wish I were flawless, but then I would be useless as a teacher: when you are effortlessly good at something, then you can’t teach it: you have no distinctions in the area of your expertise. Only when you can go, through your own awareness, from bad to good, that you have something useful to offer to the world that wants to follow you.

This is the main issue, by the way, with many of the famed and revered teachers, like Osho or Eckhart Tolle. They are really nice to read, very nurturing, but impossible to follow. Because they never went from where you are to where they are… they somehow found themselves there, using none of their own effort.
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Emotions are like firestorms, they cause incoherence, and are the most manipulated aspects of a human

eft-emotional-guidance-scaleThe best way to examine whether emotions give you a reliable internal guidance system is looking at the flip side of emotions.

In emotional terms, for example, love’s opposite is hate, disgust, being appalled, repelled. But if you look at your emotions, these opposites are right there, right behind the emotion: love… They come together like the front of your hand and the back of your hand. You are in perpetual ambivalence, yoyo-ing back and forth, ups and downs, and incoherence.

Love, the one that vibrates at 525 or so, is not an emotion. Love is a commitment to love.

Love is a commitment to accept another human exactly the way they are and exactly the way they aren’t. Whether they do the right thing, love you back, chew their food with their mouth open, lower back the lid on the toilet, or leave the top off the tooth paste.

Commitment. Not a promise, a commitment.

No ifs, no buts, no conditions.

No action necessary, just acceptance.

No show of love, no giving till it hurts, no nice talk… those are not part of love, they are societal demands.
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Your emotions make your decisions for you, not your mind. The mind only justifies your decisions

emotions vs mind making the decisions

american_goldfinch_birdbath-mindA student of mine sent me this article because of my recent discovery I talked about in the “What’s wrong with me” article, and have been elaborating on it on the free webinars that I have three times a week.

I had always taught what I learned, that first is the word, that creates the feeling, and that triggers the action. But this past Tuesday I finally put that to the test and it is now proven to be absolute horse manure: not true.

When something happens, your other than conscious mind, your emotions already react, whether you are aware of it or not. And that makes you act… even before the mind gets any of this.

Whether it is 7 seconds as they claim in this article or not, is immaterial, your mind is always late to the party…
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