Before i say anything else, all the illustrations about negative energy, negativity I use in this post are b.s. and harmful… The Hungarian Christmas pictures… I remember being a child…
I just learned something terrible about myself. A lot of people hear me as if I were their father.
You see, in my family I was the dunce… meaning stupid. And even though I had straight A grades, and I was good at everything I tried, I remained stupid for my family.
How this works I don’t know. But this seems to be the dynamic: people make a decision about you, and then they never really look at you again.
You take it on, as the truth, and freeze into it. You allow it to guide you through life.
With me it was a little different, because I am defiant. I am not defiant to the person who speaks it, I am defiant to the saying. I am going to prove them wrong.
In this article I will use ‘deserving factor’ and ‘your worth a damn factor’ interchangeably. Do they mean the same thing? I don’t know. My clarity, even after having written this article is 70%… Compared to the 10% it was when I started writing it.
I just came back from climbing the steps for the second time.
I went back to step 1 on my 67 steps. I am finding that the foundational steps are really foundational, and I better hang out there a few times, to really harvest the value of the whole 67 steps.
In the 67 steps there is a method to make decisions using a calculator. 1
Nine out of ten students skip it, the one that does it does it shabbily. Students won’t do it or won’t do it right even after I send them back to do it.
Why? Because the method uses questions that you don’t want to ask. Why? Because they upset the apple cart.
I read a book, years ago, by a therapist, for people who can’t make a decision to leave or to leave… 2 The one question that no one asked before was: when it was the best: was it really good?
I was in a relationship when I first read that book, so I asked the question and looked. And then looked at every relationship I had ever had. I found that even when it was the best, it wasn’t really good… for me. As hard as it was to accept that, I decided that I am not going to live on crumbs any more… I am happiest alone, married to my life-purpose… I left and I have been a lot happier ever since.
I found a movie that explains this. The explanation will surprise you and delight you. It is actually easier to travel between the universes than you thought. You don’t need a time machine, and you don’t need a rocket that flies faster than light. You have been actually doing it without your knowledge.
Find out what you have been doing, so you can start doing what you have always wanted to do.