It comes up for me 4-5 times a year, to ponder who had the true grit... the little girl or the big drunkard marshal? 1
You see, in my family I was the dunce... meaning stupid. And even though I had straight A grades, and I was good at everything I tried, I remained stupid for my family.
How this works I don't know. But this seems to be the dynamic: people make a decision about you, and then they never really look at you again.
You take it on, as the truth, and freeze into it. You allow it to guide you through life.
With me it was a little different, because I am defiant. I am not defiant to the person who speaks it, I am defiant to the saying. I am going to prove them wrong.
My brother, my older brother was the apple of my mother's eye. He was smart, and good looking. And a boy. He had no challenge (as far as I can see it) because he didn't look at life's challenges as challenges... he didn't study, and his grades were pitiful. Continue reading "Fighting windmills? No time to do good stuff, let alone great stuff?"
It's not hidden. It is just not obvious to the untrained eyes. What your eyes need is training and guidance.
My methodology, observing life through many distinctions, is a winning one.
It drives up, and makes visible what has thus far been invisible.
Racket, frame, memes, voices, states... the distinctions are all opportunities to see another aspect of the invisible, and gain control over yourself, so you can start moving in the direction of the good life, whatever good life is for you.
For example, your soul correction. It is a distinction to look through and see some formerly invisible stuff. Continue reading "The methodology of making the invisible visible"
I have a tiny tolerance to heat, a small tolerance to cold, a small tolerance to running on empty.
Especially painful and unsettling for me is running on empty... while you, while most people spend their daily energy allotment on trivial things, and then run on fumes all day.
For me, that is unbearable, intolerable, hell. Continue reading "MVP… Life’s most valuable player? Minimum viable product? What is the connection?"
In this article I will use 'deserving factor' and 'your worth a damn factor' interchangeably. Do they mean the same thing? I don't know. My clarity, even after having written this article is 70%... Compared to the 10% it was when I started writing it.
I went back to step 1 on my 67 steps. I am finding that the foundational steps are really foundational, and I better hang out there a few times, to really harvest the value of the whole 67 steps.
The first step is about your deserving factor.
Tai says that you have what you have deserved.
But I noticed, that instead I hear something else: I hear "my value..." or "how valuable am I?" so my precious "I" starts worrying. Continue reading "Are you worth a damn? What is your deserving factor? Where do you look to answer?"
Yesterday I added integrity to the starting point measurements. so far all people I measured ranked on 3 out of 100. Wow.
I had an exchange of text messages with a guy, whose vibration was low, and that is all he asked for. His vibration.
He is a Polish person, part of the Starseed Global Alliance to save the earth or something. To me it sounds like a computer game... to him: it is reality. 3 Continue reading "Love feedback or else… Make it a feedback loop…"
Creativity, innovation, growth, learning, takes a lot of coherent energy. When your energies are incoherent, you are troubled, are in a hurry, or are afraid, creativity is impossible.
Just imagine yourself a juggler... because that is what creativity is: being able to keep and move around multiple objects in the air at the same time, so you can see new connections. Really...
Most people can't keep one thought in the air for longer than seconds... unless they fixate on it... fixating means: all other flying objects fall... So most people have no experience in creativity, because they are mostly incoherent.
And just like with water turning from incoherent to coherent only at a certain vibrational level (frequency?) you also need to raise your vibration to a certain level to become creative. Temporarily, at least. Continue reading "What can you do, what must you do to benefit from the teachings of the “Law of Attraction”, of “The Power of your Mind”, and Natalie Ledwell’s Mind Movies?"
And they fancy themselves all-knowing, all-expert at everything.
My brother calls this the "do it yourself" culture.
And utter disrespect for people with experience, education, expertise. Or for skills, expertise, experience, and learning.
I worked as an architect in Hungary, for 11 years. Every client knew everything better. They considered me their guy who puts the stamp to their plan so they can get a building permit.
My brother was in a different profession, and his experience was the same: no humility, no sense of what it takes to actually be good at something, to see things fully. Continue reading "How hard can it be? said Father Brown as he was grinding the car’s transmission…"
But like most of the books Tai recommends, it does have a kernel of gold... Maybe more than one kernel.
One of these is what he says about will power. Quite fascinating and very useful.
He says, that just like glycogen, brain food for thinking, will power uses energy, food, and can be depleted.
I don't have to rely on will power, because about a year ago I started to reorganize my life to habitually do the things that serve me, and remove the opportunities for doing things that don't serve me.
It did take will power to establish the habits, but I did it one at a time, and one at a time it was easier to see that the new habits served me. Continue reading "How we spend our days is of course how we spend our lives…"
It addressed something I wanted to address, because it is important: treating yourself well by providing yourself with what you need to be well, to do well, to feel well.
You treat your pets better than yourself.
If you were only judgmental and stingy with others, that would be one thing. But you are stingy with yourself.
You judge yourself harshly, you treat yourself badly, and you skimp on yourself first.
Consider yourself your own child, or your own pet? And your relationship, your treatment of it public.
A lot of people, in private, abuse with impunity, but would not dare do the same in public, or when someone can see it. They fear judgment. Continue reading "Is happiness even possible? Is self-hate, self-punishing a good path to it?"