You look around. Everyone seems to have it better than you. They laugh, they hug, they walk hand in hand, kiss... or have friends who like them... but you? If feels like you have no one, no one cares about you, no one responds well to you... You are not getting enough "strokes"... from others.
A "stroke" (in Transactional Analysis) is a unit of social transaction. A hug. A nod. A smile. A hello, a thank you, a "how are you?", or an f... you.... these are all social transactions. The more strokes you get the less your spine will shrivel up on you...
What is an adult, what is a child... and does your ego-state (Child, Parent, Adult) influence how much money you have, how much love you have, how healthy you are? 1
In the starting point measurements I measure (#19) To what degree you have access to your adult capacities. 2 or asked in another way, how much does your adult run your life? The more adult the more results...
And how much is the child running your life, how much is it running your life to the ground?
One of the most surprising thing in the world of humans is that humans can't tell if they are smart or not. This error leads to lives that are not fulfilled, filled with fear, trepidation, or on the other extreme: boasting and disappointment. 1
I just watched two episodes of a Korean series where most people were dimwitted.
Dimwitted is just another word for "not smart"... but it is a good word because you can see that something is dimmed... as in "it's dark here... you can't see much".
Why am I such a Nazi when it comes to who I am willing to work with?
Remember the soup Nazi? Who ran his soup takeout shop like a prison camp? And people lined up and waited patiently to be given soup... that was so good, and so hard to come by, they were willing to earn it... I want to be like the soup Nazi.
I am reading this guy's book. I say "this guy" because I don't want you to read it. I want you to read my blog...
In a lot of ways he and I teach the same things, even though we use different words. He uses words from psychology and woowoo science... I use words like Amish Horse Training Method, Memes, Marker Feelings.
Regardless, I am continuing on the theme, because this is one of the stumbling block for most of you... so although you don't know what is eating your lunch... although you have no idea how you are screwing up, I do, and I am here to help you till you get it. I already have a third article in the pipeline... ;-/