Emotions are like firestorms, they cause incoherence, and are the most manipulated aspects of a human

eft-emotional-guidance-scaleThe best way to examine whether emotions give you a reliable internal guidance system is looking at the flip side of emotions.

In emotional terms, for example, love’s opposite is hate, disgust, being appalled, repelled. But if you look at your emotions, these opposites are right there, right behind the emotion: love… They come together like the front of your hand and the back of your hand. You are in perpetual ambivalence, yoyo-ing back and forth, ups and downs, and incoherence.

Love, the one that vibrates at 525 or so, is not an emotion. Love is a commitment to love.

Love is a commitment to accept another human exactly the way they are and exactly the way they aren’t. Whether they do the right thing, love you back, chew their food with their mouth open, lower back the lid on the toilet, or leave the top off the tooth paste.

Commitment. Not a promise, a commitment.

No ifs, no buts, no conditions.

No action necessary, just acceptance.

No show of love, no giving till it hurts, no nice talk… those are not part of love, they are societal demands.
Continue reading “Emotions are like firestorms, they cause incoherence, and are the most manipulated aspects of a human”

How you dampen the fire that motivates you to grow

I came up with the expression “top 10% of your mind” many years ago, when I was teaching the What Color is Your Parachute workshop.

It is said that you only use 5% of your brain. But, of course, you use  your brain most of the time, but not for something worth using a precision instrument even the stupidest person possesses. Continue reading “How you dampen the fire that motivates you to grow”

Strategy: should you have one? Plan: should you have one? and what about Goals?

certain of your self

Summary: to have a sense of self, to have a strong self, you need to be self-directed in your journey… which also means having a journey. The size of your life is the size of your project, and most people have small projects, mostly for otter people. You’ll learn how to start building a life and how to be directed by Self by using some basic principles.

We begin, today, the process of building up and protecting the Self from the world, never mind that you have no idea what self is: it will be clear after a few articles, don’t be impatient. It is not a simple task: after all no one has done it before… REALLY!

You’ll need to walk with me through this discovery process, without using your mind to understand: the mind is not able to understand this: this is new! And a new type of process: I am not giving you the results of years worth of thinking: I am doing this with you: live.
Continue reading “Strategy: should you have one? Plan: should you have one? and what about Goals?”