…And I recoil from dirty laundry…

I should be doing some laundry. I have run out of socks… And anyways, I want to tame this beast of not doing my laundry.

I gather a load’s worth of stuff, carry it to the washing machine… and the distaste, the disgust is so strong… I take a beeline… and sit down by my computer.

Distaste, eh? Yeah, says muscle test. Disgust? yes. Was it always there? No. Was it from when i was 3? later… from age seven.

What was happening at age seven? I went to school. We had a live-in help: my mother was working on her Masters Degree, coming home around nine every night. My brother was about a year old… and was probably driving the live-in help bonkers.

And I recoil from dirty laundry…

I sit really quietly. The fear joins the distaste. I feel terror. I feel being beaten. Screamed at. Wrapped in wet sheets… Can’t breathe…

I must have wet my bed. I don’t remember. My body remembers. The fear, the disgust, the gagging.

The body remembers.
Continue reading “…And I recoil from dirty laundry…”

How does your past get into your future… and make you repeat the same life

I have an older blog that is attacked by hackers every week. They install malware… so I don’t want you to go there…

It’s an old website, more than 10 years ago it was my main blog. Most of it is still useful. 1

I have started to move the old blog posts, one by one, to my yourvibration.com site.

One of those posts reminded me, that until you get what I am writing in it, your future will be much like your past.

While I was researching for pictures, I found that what I am teaching is against the mainstream ineffective, all in the visible… the mind is powerful type of teaching.

Reality, if you watch a person, reality doesn’t work the way THOSE people, those memes, those motivational speakers tell you it works. The nature of reality is that 90% of what moves anything or anyone, the CAUSE, is in the invisible/unconscious domain of life. Continue reading “How does your past get into your future… and make you repeat the same life”

Reframing: What is your higher power?

Frame: Your higher power? 1

Back in 1988 I had an emotional meltdown. I suddenly remembered things from my childhood.

I was suggested by someone in Landmark that it would be beneficial for me to join an ACOA group. Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families.

I did. I had clear signals that I belonged. #1 of the identifying features of ACOA people is “I don’t know who I am”. 2

Anyway, an ACOA group is not a fun place. Continue reading “Reframing: What is your higher power?”

How do you think of yourself less? What does that mean? Thinking of others? Becoming a do-gooder?

OK, I am going to clarify something that myself don’t quite know how it works, and why it works that way.

So it may come out incomprehensible, botched up, and useless. But, in my view, it is worth to try…

Note: if you only read one example, make it #5!

OK, the issue: one of the measurements is to what degree your life is about you and your life… the words I use I borrowed from someone else… 1 and the words are “to what degree you think of yourself”… as a measure of humility i.e. how much room you have to learn and grow, how much room you have for the world, for work, for life… for others. Continue reading “How do you think of yourself less? What does that mean? Thinking of others? Becoming a do-gooder?”

What is Negativity?

negativityWhat is negativity?

Most of us seem to know what it is, we feel it, some in their guts, some in their heart, but feel it, especially when other people are negative. When it’s within us, we feel despair, anxiety, worry, we have a sense of dread, or we are sad, nervous, stressed, hyper, manic, depressed, or just listless. We get sick from it.

We do not recognize it as negativity on ourselves and that allows it to go rampant, unmanaged, something that happens to us and all we can do about it is complain, bear it, or take some pills.

In the normal course of events we don’t notice anything special tied to what we think or say, because we are so mired in negativity, it’s normal. Our life is lived in quiet (or not so quiet) desperation, and that’s that. Continue reading “What is Negativity?”

How To Beat Depression Without Medication

How To Beat Depression Without Medication

Eppic Smith

You Can Beat Depression… if you recognize it as depression

I found this article when I searched for the phrase “beat depression.”

Many of us are depressed. Depression can be low-grade or raging… I am most interested in the low-grade depression, it is easier to beat depression that is low-grade without medication.

The writer of this article uses valid arguments for self-management, but misses a lot of factors, like what did he do, exactly, that allowed him to beat depression to begin with.

He says he took responsibility for his feeling down and out, ad he kicked the medications… so far so good.

But what he isn’t saying is that depression is a sign of something.

What is it a sign of? In my experience, as a once depressed person (for 40 years!) I have noticed a few common characteristics with my coaching clients.

  1. I lacked desire.
  2. I was not happy with myself
  3. I could not see myself clearly doing what I thought I wanted to do… the picture was there like fuzzy patches, but not like a movie.

So, how do you get out of these three interconnected and synergistic (negatively) states of mind?

I think that the easiest is to start with number 2.

Why? Because it is easier go get happy(er) with yourself, especially because you need energy for the other two, and having a good feeling about yourself will give you energy.

You can also start really small, like doing something that you consider hard to do, but still doable, like

Continue reading “How To Beat Depression Without Medication”