The Enchanted Forest, Fairy Tales, and how to start living like a person

I have one student who actually is doing the work the way the work was meant to be done.

It sounds meager... but it is all I ever wanted... really.

If you have one student who actually does what you teach, you can tell if what you teach works or not. Or tweak what you teach to accommodate the difficulties they experience. And watch if the changes you made will make the results match what you intended to accomplish.

What do the rest of the people do? I mean the students in the same program? I am not sure. Apple polishing? Feeble attempts to fake me?

Humans live this fake, apple polishing lives, thinking that life should respond to their feeble attempts, to their intention, to their desire, or whatever the heck they were taught should change reality to what they want reality to be.

This, humanity, humans, include the millions of writers who dish out advice... Continue reading "The Enchanted Forest, Fairy Tales, and how to start living like a person"

…And live to tell the tale…

You want to live a life where you say this about yourself, a lot. "...And I lived to tell the tale..."

Where you are on the edge... and come back to tell the tale.

The edge? it feels like the dividing line between life and death. It is just a feeling. Some edge is quite inconsequential, but the going there is tremendous.

I signed up to be coached on Monday, and it's Sunday, and I am already "fired".

Another man's integrity may be out of integrity for you. Another man's wisdom is not YOUR wisdom. That is what happened.

I was asked to do something that doesn't agree, doesn't foster love between my two selves. Everybody is doing it... but for me to love ME, I can't do it.

If you are not free to be yourself, then your integrity number is low.

Integrity is an inside job, and only you can call the shot...

But... Without integrity nothing work. Continue reading "…And live to tell the tale…"

Internet Marketing Beginnings

I had an inspiration this morning: I woke up early. I made myself a cup of tea, went back to bed, and read a little.

About an hour later I woke up from a dream of writing THIS article. Here it is, just the way it came to me in my dream:

Each great thing that was ever built started with something that had the greatness, as a potential only.

Most didn't look like the start of something great. Many times it was a comedy of errors and their correction that took someone to something big.

But, you say, we are always told to create with the big picture in mind... Oh yes, that one. I know that well. The misunderstanding of that notion has robbed me of many successes...

The misunderstanding of that principle has rendered me indecisive, unresponsive, tentative, or jumping from one sure thing to another.

Imagine if the tree thought that every seed it is producing must become a big tree... it would be so afraid of living, it would start to shrink and refuse to go to seed. The prospect of so many wasted seeds would kill the tree's aliveness and creativity.

No, greatness is a potential, dormant in every little seed, and with enough great little seeds produced, one of them may become a big tree...

Let's look at MY story.

Back in 1988 I found myself unemployed from architecture, and unemployable at the same time... don't ask me why, I won't tell.

I was spending quite a few months depressed, going to self help programs, 12-step, Werner Erhard and Associates, etc. ... barely having 3-day worth of work a month to live on.

I couldn't think of anything to do... I was too entrenched in being an architect. At some point, I did an exercise from the "What Color Is Your Parachute" and found that what I wanted to do, that caused me pleasure, is "put ink on paper and communicate."

I took it literally at the time, and thought advertising or publishing.

I didn't know much of either.

I went and apprenticed (free) with a small printer for a while, and learned some stuff, bought a letter press with some letters, wrote advertising in mail order magazines... to sell some pyramid schemes... and then when I really needed some money to earn, I wrote a letter to the two throw-away magazines in my area, asking if they had a job opening for publisher's apprentice.

One of them called and said that such a job didn't exist but I could start selling advertising. No "draw" (salary), only commission. Does that put me closer to publishing, I asked, and the guy said yes. I took the job.

I was trained by another salesperson. We visited a few stores in my town--typical advertisers in that paper. We sold 5 small ads that day. I say "we", but I think it was her. That day completed my training. Next day I walked back to the business area of my little town, and found that by the time I got there, the training salesperson had driven there and sold them, or attempted to. I had no wheels, and soon I had no hope.

I called the other magazine, and bragged that I had sold 7 ads my first week for their competitor... they were impressed. They gave me a 200 dollar advance, and a beat up car with a gas card.

I worked my butt off, sold ads, delivered magazines, partook in every office meeting, went to the printer, went to the typesetter, collected monies... two months later, I was put in charge of designing the ads and laying out the magazine. Two more months later I was offered a partnership in the magazine. Still, my best week I made $400... I didn't have many good weeks.

I worked 20 hours a day 7 days a week... I was bossy, I was certain, I was "dynamic", I was disrespectful... 5 months later I was offered the choice to resign, or... it was blackmail. I resigned. No-brainer.
Continue reading "Internet Marketing Beginnings"

Do You Think You Can Tell WHAT You See?

Most of us are sure we can. We make decisions based on what we see, and our decisions and actions take us to live the life we live.

Most of us live a life of quiet desperation. It was true at the turn of the last century, and it is true now.

There was a discipline and coaching paradigm I studied and used about 9 years ago. It is based on axiology, the Nobel Prize nominated work of Robert Hartman.

Axiology is the study of value or quality. It is the science that deals with what is good and what is not. Beyond and independent of subjective judgment.

The test (Value Profile) we ran in axiology had 4 parameters by which we could map out the potential for success of any individual.

One of them relates to the title. The parameter is called "clarity".
Continue reading "Do You Think You Can Tell WHAT You See?"

Did Your Personality Get Put Together vs. You Were Born That Way?

I got a thank you note today. I get quite a few of those, I must admit.

They are a great way for me to track how the methodologies and principles I use in my teaching work. I mean, how effective I am, how effective the methods are. They track my ability to make a difference in the world. (Someone please remind me to write about how I view my making a difference... OK?)

This note reads

Today was a huge success. I did not even recognize myself. I was attempting to have a conversation with my sister when she became extremely aggressive upon trying to control me and failing. She was in my face yelling and pacing around in circles. I remained calm and did not attempt to defend myself as the lies flew at me. I was able to stick to the subject and not accuse. At this point her husband jumped in and tried to intimidate me, pointing his finger in my face and yelling. They both looked like mad men ganging up on me. I did not raise my voice or get emotional. This is the first time in my life I had no fear in a confrontational situation and it felt GREAT! To be honest I think it frightened my sister & her husband. They did not know what to think of me, I have had many weaknesses in the past but now I am strong.

Continue reading "Did Your Personality Get Put Together vs. You Were Born That Way?"

Will You Succeed or Will You Fail in Internet Marketing or pretty much any other endeavor?

When you ask people what made them who they are today, invariably all of them answer a version of the same thing: The past.

How they express this varies: my parents, my schooling, what I have been doing, my genes, etc. etc. but all in all, they all mean the same: what makes me who I am today is the past.

If that were true, that would be bad news, really.

Imagine that it is true. Now see yourself trying to be successful online. Given your track record, and your genes, and your past behavior, how much chance do you have for success?

I'd love to say zero, but it would be unfair to many of you. So instead, I answer it in a way that applies to all of you:

The same as yesterday. Or a year ago...

Now, that is a total bummer, isn't it? Continue reading "Will You Succeed or Will You Fail in Internet Marketing or pretty much any other endeavor?"