This is probably the most politically incorrect post I have ever written… I could not find a picture to illustrate it on the whole world wide web.
Why is it politically incorrect? Because the current Dark Side suggestion is that you are perfect the way you are, and your job is to forgive yourself any faults, if you even have any, and keep looking to the outside where other people are worse than you…. Dark Side suggestions are designed to keep you miserable and powerless till you die… 1
But the picture and quote I found is true, even if no one understands it. Oh well…
Before I get into the meat of the article, I’d like to share what happened in Israel during and after the War of Independence (1948-), lasting about 20-25 years.
Most new immigrants lived in kibbutzim, and in kibbutzim, a kind of ‘collective’, the children spent most of their times in children’s houses. They slept there too. Once a week they spent some time with their parents ( every kibbutz had their own schedule)
99% of the children who grew up in the kibbutzim became emotionally healthy, powerful youth and adults. Even the ‘runts’ were happier, healthier, stronger, than today’s people in Israel.
What you think has little to do with your actions.
The connection between speaking and action needs to be established, good example, when you read the instructions. It is not obvious how to do what the words say, and it is not obvious that understanding can lead you to that action. Seeing an action allows you to copy it: action to action: no translator is needed. But words to action… lots can be lost in the translation.
That is the biggest puzzlement of teachers… and very few are able to create a bridge between words and actions successfully.
Innocence: they are still surprised at deception. You are hiding it because you want to be right and admitting that you are a fool makes you look bad!
Personal notes: I am a teacher of transformation. I am a seller of my own courses and energized products. My products work, I use them, and I watch people who use them like a hawk. When something doesn’t quite deliver, I work until I find what’s missing, and provide it.And I am poor. Not quite penniless, but definitely poor.
I live in a small city, in a two bedroom apartment with one other apartment in the house, downstairs.
For the most part I am fine, the downstairs neighbor, 80% of the time, is OK… but when he isn’t, I suffer, and I suffer mightily.
It would be ideal for me to live in a cottage, so I can be far from people… but, of course, the money that all my brilliance is able to generate isn’t going to cover the cost of that upgrade.
This article came as a result of my musings how come I won’t ever get rich with my wares, and how come that teachers that teach crap are raking it in…
I am not bitter about it, by the way, this is just how it is, and I am well. As long as muscle test says “continue” I’ll brave the circumstances.
Most sales (of anything anywhere, including food, shelter, etc… but especially in the domain of self-growth, spirituality, abundance, and the other non-tangible areas of life) are based on deception. Sellers are either personally deceiving people, or “institutionally”, meaning that they are selling something that people think will do something for them, but they didn’t learn it or get it from them…
Let’s deal with both of them.
Individuals deceiving you, selling you snake oil
The first is easier: the seller knows that what they are selling is worthless or harmful. They know it by using it themselves and not getting the results, and getting to witness the “results” on their customers.
Like you, I want certainty. Like you, I want to be sure. Like you, I want to understand how the world works.
Why? Because we are coming from a personal world view that Life is dangerous. Or something to that effect.
Osho has a theory that when you are born and have to suddenly and without preparation leave the safety and luxury of the womb, your first emotional response is fear. Especially if you are born in a delivery room with glaring lights, lots of noise, and someone holding you upside down and slapping your bottom to make you breathe.
L. Ron Hubbard (of Dianetics fame) adds that people talk in the delivery room, and you absorb all of it as if it were the truth about you. One of my students had a hard time getting through the birth canal, and was stuck for a while. “She is stuck…” the doctor said, and she’s been stuck ever since.
Another student of mine (probably) heard in the delivery room “I can’t feel anything” and lo and behold, he can’t feel anything. Hunger, anger, love… none of it.
Now, whether that is the reason, or it is cultural, it is immaterial. You live in a world where the mood is: The world is dangerous, mistakes are bad, you need to know, and therefore you are incessantly looking for a safer way to live.
In that environment, you “buy” anything that sounds like an explanation to all the strange things you hear or feel. You follow anyone “who has the answer.” You follow religions, gurus, teachers, you become vegetarian, fruitarian, anything to avoid the uncertainty of life, i.e. life itself.
Do you have this attitude? It sounds something like this: why should I have to work so hard, pay attention, ask for it, earn it, dress up, look good, do well, get a degree, read that book, do my homework… they should just give it to me, because I am pretty, I was good last week, I am already tired…
I got lucky today. I have been playing the Self-disciplineactivator, and it must work wider than that, or maybe this is the point, but my awareness is over the top. I notice stuff about myself that I never knew I had.
This is how I caught this attitude, the killer of all results, and the genesis of a lot of grumpy, disgruntled people’s anger.
I knew about one aspect of it for a long time. As a business woman I have had this attitude that people should just buy from me because my product is good, without me having to tell them it’s good, without me having to sell it.
It never worked, of course. But I thought that I was over it.