How do you know what you are afraid of? Why you are afraid… even when you have no reason to be.

what are you afraid of?It was 1991. Georgia... some miles from Atlanta, in a hunting lodge. November. Communication Commando Course.

Just the name was enough to put the fear of god in me. But then they ushered me in this little room where I needed to answer some questions about myself, name, age, where I live, who I live with... in front of a camera.

Now, by that time I had been on television twice, seen and recognized by millions of people. And yet, I was terrified.

What was I afraid of?

This is what this article is about... what is it that you are afraid of, that you cannot tell what it is, but it is as real as that if they keep you underwater long enough, you'll be dead. Dead dead.... Continue reading "How do you know what you are afraid of? Why you are afraid… even when you have no reason to be."

If fear rules you and your life… Here is a strategy to reclaim your self and your life

flight. the spirit is only interested there be flyingMost people, to one degree or another, are ruled by fear. Most of that fear is fear of nothing-in-particular, just fear. And some of that fear is being afraid of getting hurt, of being laughed at, of looking foolish, of making a mistake, of losing face.

But fear is fear, and on the horizontal plane, for the horizontal self, there is nothing more important than to listen to the fear and avoid doing anything that awakens fear.

Result: your life is stagnant, your self-respect is disappearing, and you shrink, and shrink. It doesn't feel good.

Fear is getting stronger, and you are getting weaker.

Continue reading "If fear rules you and your life… Here is a strategy to reclaim your self and your life"

The plot thickens

In flu season the only things that can keep you safer are staying away from other people, frequent washing of hands, and being already well... high functioning immune system.

Normally this is a picture of me... but not this time around.

I have a weakened immune system, and I went to my exercise class yesterday.

I could even feel when the bug landed in my nose. I immediately sprayed my throat with my Dr. Schulze throat spray: I don't go anywhere without it. And I skirted a full blown flu... I hope. I spent the rest of the day in bed, shivering and blowing my nose. I also gave myself at least 10 liver cleanses. 1 Continue reading "The plot thickens"

Want to be the one who is making the decisions in your life?

back-to-the-future-2This week has been a success for Life, and a disaster financially. Everyone was spending their money on turkey, I guess.

So I am going to announce some sales for this coming week. I'll make them good... so you'll buy.

Now, about the successes that lead me to a huge insight.

Everything that people do is guided by memes, and they think they decided to do it. And you think they decided to do it from the goodness of their heart, from the badness of their heart, whatever seem to be the case. But in fact they never decided anything... It is the memes that are doing the deciding. Continue reading "Want to be the one who is making the decisions in your life?"

Not all complaints are created equal plus a funny story to wake you up

wake-up-dudeThis article may be the most important article you'll ever read... This is not an exaggeration. Any day is a good day to wake up, but around these weeks of greed and herdlike stomping to get more stuff, it is especially a good time. So, as you understand, this is a wake up article...

We all say we hate complainers. And we all complain.

But is there any form of complaint that is not a downer, that is not a racket, that is a good thing?

I like to watch entire series of television shows on Netflix. If I don't like it, I just start another one. No commercials, no TV needed, easy.

I watched Foyle's War, a British series, and I was encouraged: well written, well played. So I started to watch a Swedish series, Wallander. Five stars... must be good.
Continue reading "Not all complaints are created equal plus a funny story to wake you up"

Your consciousness is blocked from flying, your consciousness is starved

caged-consciousnessOne of the reasons the 67 steps coaching is wonderful, is because, done the right way, it leads consciousness on a trip that is both wide and deep. Wider than deep, by the way. But even if you remain on the surface, but go where the steps take you, you can raise your consciousness by a lot.

The insight came to me while sleeping... I was taken somewhere, and I consistently refused to go down a certain "tunnel"...

And that is the life of a human. It is defined more by the places you don't go than the places you do. Literally.

I know a lot of people who read, but dismiss certain topics, certain authors, certain ideas or ideology... so they don't have to go down the "tunnel".

Tunnel could be called "rabbit hole" if you wish. 1 Continue reading "Your consciousness is blocked from flying, your consciousness is starved"

The Truth of the Story you tell… or how to change your future by changing the story

your story gives you your lifeYour story is boring, repetitive, and fixed. You tell it the same every time the same way, and it gives you a life of gloom and doom, an ever narrowing, ever more impoverished version of the Life you could have.

This article is about blowing some life into your story, so you can have more life.

"Know something, sugar? Stories only happen to people who can tell them." - Allan Gurganus

Gurganus is right. The truth happens to everyone, but stories only happen to people who can tell them. And tell them well...
Continue reading "The Truth of the Story you tell… or how to change your future by changing the story"

I was looking at trust, the intangible capacity to trust… and its role in becoming a winner

no trust - no winningIn the past four months that I have been able to turn on individual capacities for people, I have received no request to turn on trust.

Why is that?

After all people, rightly, asked me for self-trust. But self-trust won't be enough.

So what can be the current world view with regards to trust, that trust doesn't come up as number one to turn on.

Because, whether you know it or not, without trust there is no winning. Without trust there is no flow. Without trust there is no fulfillment.

When I measured some winners in life, for whom it took years to hone their skills with which they won, money, recognition, admiration... trust was there, fully open.

As you probably already know, I use playing Freecell as my laboratory. It is much the way Richard Dawkins, The Selfish Gene author used the computer simulation "Prisoner's Dilemma"... very enlightening for me.

So, what I saw today, and it's only 6:45 am, lol, that without trust you can only play for keeps, or without trust you can't open your eyes wide, and take steps that will only pay off 20-30 steps down the line. Continue reading "I was looking at trust, the intangible capacity to trust… and its role in becoming a winner"

What does humility mean?

inhale the good shit-exhale the bullshitWhy am I pushing humility, the capacity?

Humility is one of those words that mainstream says it means something other than it actually means.

Humility simply means: you are willing to not take it personally. You are willing to not have it mean anything about you.

Why is this important?

When anything, and I mean any thing means anything about you, you are hooked. Your ego is hooked. It becomes a survival game... and in survival it is an either you or me game.

So, simply put humility means putting ego on pause.
Continue reading "What does humility mean?"

As long as you are stuck, no new capacities will be working… Cinematherapy anyone?

Inside-Out-Study-Guide-683x1024Most people are stuck... movement is not possible. It can be total or it can be partial.

To see where you are stuck is difficult, because the cause, the stuck part can be several layers deep.

A skilled coach or therapist may fail to find the linchpin issue, because in the normal course of a therapy, it is talking, the words, that are masking it.

One of my students in the Reclaim program has chosen to work with the idea of inspiring movies. Using movies to unstuck people is a brilliant method, and also fun. And even if the first movie doesn't do the trick, time wasn't wasted, because a good movie is also a great experience.

Reading people's responses of where their Dark Side is, looking through the idea of using movies to get them moving again, or maybe moving for the first time, is very appealing.

All movies have an element of "healing by proxy"...
Continue reading "As long as you are stuck, no new capacities will be working… Cinematherapy anyone?"