This is one of the things I haven't seen anyone teach... So here you go.
I have taught it on live webinars but this is the first time I am attempting to do it in writing: it may not go well... Let's see...
Many people are in search of truth. Many are activists. Many are into self-improvement.
What is in common with all of us, humans, living in society, is that everything we do is to fill in a void, to fix what's wrong, and get away from what's bad.
Prescription for unhappiness: deny, resist what is, and strive to get to something that isn't.
This is rich, so please don't nod: it will be a pretense if you do. There is no way you actually got what I said... no way.
It's near impossible to get that standing in the middle of it: your ego, your mind will prevent you from seeing it.
You can only get it from the observer's position.
You may be able to get it about another person, but not about yourself.
You see, to be able to see reality, you'd get to get out of the constructs of the mind... and that is only possible if the vantage point is outside of the mind.
Instead of searching for the truth, instead of eliminating what shouldn't be (activists) and instead of improving yourself... you need strive to see reality the way reality is.
If you look at how it is and it is wrong, or lacking anything: you can be sure you are not looking at reality. You are looking at the should or shouldn't be reality.
Reality is the way things are, and there is nothing in reality that shouldn't be, and there is nothing in reality that should be but isn't.
Reality is all yes-yes-yes-yes...
No matter how long you look at reality, you won't find a "no", no matter how hard you try.
"No" is a human construct, only lives in language, not in reality.
Happiness is loving what is real. That is the reason you haven't been happy... you have only loved what you liked... not everything that is.
You live inside trying to fill what is missing, trying to fix what's wrong, becoming something you are not.
Meaning: you are not dealing with what is real, you are spending your whole life in what is unreal.
You and everyone else around you.
You are in perfect agreement with everyone around you: you are not what or who you should be... total unreality.
How you do anything is how you do everything to the rescue:
You see, normally we use this saying to point out what you do wrong... but the reverse is also true: you can learn with low-risk activities to do the right thing, to start interacting with yourself and the world based on reality and not on unreality.
It's a learning process, not an event. The trick is to remember... not to do it right. The more you practice the more areas will be available, the more you practice the more it becomes a way of looking, a way of life.
The big step towards happiness.
Here is how the practice goes:
Exercise 1: Go to your kitchen. Look around. Observe what you have, food, utensils, dishes. Then make something for yourself with what you have: cook, combine, etc.
Notice if your thought wanders to what you'd rather have, what you don't have, what you forgot to buy, what you should buy next time.
Bring creativity into what you'll make with what you have.
Exercise 2: If you are in business, or if you want to be in business: look and make an inventory of what you have. Observe that what you don't have wants to push at you.
With creativity, look what you can make/do with what you have.
Notice that the resistance will take you to the thought of what you are missing... what you are lacking, inside or outside.
Comment on what you saw. Shy? Send me an email.