In a recent article I pit reed-mode against oak-mode.
I call one flexible and the other inflexible or stuck.
But there is more to it.
- Reed can be blown in any direction, and it doesn’t resist
- Reed will return to its neutral state once the wind stops blowing. It knows what it is, and it returns there. It’s a natural state of growth, happiness and peace.
Sometimes you think you are a reed, because you are blown, in one direction: misery. But you are mistaken.
You have a tendency to be blown to one direction, and stay there.
You may view yourself incompetent, lazy, unorganized, etc… and that is the path you are going to cover… from one end to the other.
Your natural state is misery.
You are not flexible, you are like a pendulum: stuck in a rut, swinging between two extremes.
Now, if that is not horrible enough, there is another aspect that I’d like to bring your attention to:
You’ll be able to appreciate, notice, value, and be only what fits between those two extremes.
I could not see that I could stop exaggerating, telling tall tales, or gossiping about others.
Until I could get out of that smart/stupid ditch, the world had only two colors…
When I look back at who I was, I am mortified. But at the time I could not see it. All I could do is swing from smart to stupid.
Other people gave me praise and gave me criticism, and I was as if nothing happened, because anything they said I could not relate to at all.
They called me fearless… but I was just smart or stupid… They called me condescending, but I was just smart or stupid.
And if you had the misfortune to have to deal with me, I saw nothing of you, except smart/stupid. No such thing as loyalty, or brave, or honest, or on time, or diligent, or having dignity… No, that was outside of the ditch made by the pendulum, and I could not see it, could not appreciate it.
I saw my limitations for the first time back in 2002 or 2003… I don’t remember.
I had the good fortune that someone told me that I was a gossip and that I was a liar… and they had the words to support their statements.
At first I was up in arms, then I was devastated, ashamed, then I was trying to change how I was…
And in the end, I was able to fully call on flexibility, and allow people to be how they are without having to talk about them, and I was able to allow how it was, without having to embellish it.
It was difficult, because I had to do it alone.
The world is more than willing to play your game, agree with you… and in essence, betray you.
Misery loves company… and being stuck in judgment, and in pendulum mode IS misery.
So, as you see, in addition to activating Flexibility, you are going to have to do some work, maybe even a lot, to be 360 degrees free and flexible.
Is it worth it? Hell yeah.
For a little bit I’ll do this work on the weekend activation session. Then I may create some other programs, maybe I’ll revive the Playground.
Unfortunately, to me, this type of work works best in personal voice interactions, not in writing. My only coaching program, at present, is the Reclaim… and it is all in writing.
But you will need to get to a place where you feel that you need it… So please get Flexibility activated, if you haven’t.