I prefer the second path.
Once you love yourself, learning new things to do well is much easier.
So far 46 people read my article about the exercise for self love.
One of them actually did what I did, followed my example, and wrote to me about his experience. He is astute 1.
So what did the rest of them do?
Some of them, at least, hugged themselves, and felt the pain or the sadness.
Did any of them have a conversation? Yes. Some of them.
Instead I talked about the things I did or didn't do.
So, what does it matter? It does.
You see, if you want to get self-love, you can't put your labels between you and you. They are interpretations, and they will be near impossible to remove.
Isn't that what I did? No, that is not what I did. I spoke about my messy house. I spoke about my age. I spoke about my missing tooth. The legs that hurt. My tone of conversation (harsh), the amount of money I have.
There are things that are closer to reality, even a Martian would see them.
They are not a matter of opinion, they seem to be facts. That most people would agree upon. Maybe "harsh" doesn't belong... forgive me.
Interpretations on the other hand, are skewed, slanted views of reality... He is a jerk, I am a waste, I am stupid, I can't do anything right, I am not good enough...
Lots of people will agree, but not all. Because they are opinions...
So, in your conversation between You and you, you want to ask about facts that could make the big You not love you.
If you ask the big You: Can you love me, even though I am a jerk... if You answers yes, you are stuck being a jerk...There is nothing you can do, because you can't fix what is not real.
I asked about my house and the mess... Can I fix that? Yes, because it is real. I can even hire someone to fix it for me.
Can you hire someone to fix that you are a jerk? I didn't think so.
So, please, I know you can't or could not see the difference. I know that you are this vague everywhere in your life... You know why? Because seeing clearly is made up of several capacities you don't have.
But now that I have explained, can you at least go back and try again?
Please? For your own sake?
Humility is the capacity to look at least twice, and say: hm... is that what it says? Is what I see is what is there?
99% certain that the answer is no. But until you know that you need humility, you won't ask for it... You won't use it. You remain blind, arrogant, and clueless.
PS: Quite a few interesting things are happening. For example, this French woman sent me an email to tell me that she feels for me and for my misery. WTF... did I share misery. She also recommended that I follow some guru who teaches exactly what I say won't work...
When I told her that I don't think that guy's stuff works, she became all huffy puffy...
Let me set you straight: if you are here to prove that some program you believe in works, and my stuff doesn't... Please just go away. It is both non-astute to solicit me to your stuff... and to think that I'll like it. Please don't be stupid. Please?