Your behaviors, your feelings and emotions are the tip of the iceberg, hiding the below water part, your attitudes.
How do you eat your cherries?
Remember or imagine having a ball of cherries in front of you. Or blueberries. Or a box of different chocolates.
You reach out and take a cherry, or whatever you have in front of you.
- Did you take the largest, most ripe cherry? The best of all the chocolates?
- Did you take the puny little cherry first? The kind of chocolate you don't really like?
- Did you just take any of the cherries?
The underlying attitude shows clearly on your behavior.
- If you took the largest cherry... you want your results now, not later. If you look deeply enough, you don't want to work for your rewards either.
- If you took the puniest cherry, then you are planning for the journey: every cherry will taste better than the previous one. And you are probably willing to work for success... and enjoy the work.
- If you just took any of the cherries, then your relationship to life is based on not even seeing the difference. You are probably unaware, and not present.
Now, reading this, I guess, will want to change your behavior.
But alas, changing the tip or the iceberg won't change the depth... the attitude.
A student of mine is struggling. She is asking me what to do so she can change her life. What she is unaware of, is that the attitude, deep in the sea, is running the show... That she is unwilling to look at.
So let's look at some attitudes, the bottom of the iceberg, and some emotions that are on the top.
let's look at some emotions, and see what attitudes feed them.
Now, before I get to it, ask the question: why are we doing this? And here is why: You have no control over your emotions. None. But you have a lot more control over your attitudes. 1
Of course your control over your attitudes is largely influenced by the number of "intangibles", the number of DNA capacities you have working. I don't want to lie to you: there are attitudes that you'll not be able to change with the number of capacities you now have. But at least you'll know...
- So, emotion: Frustration
The attitudes underneath are:
- there is something wrong with it, with them, with me
- Life should be different than life is (it should be easy, fair, fun, etc.)
- It should be instant...
The essence is: it's wrong how it is. I am a victim...
- I should be faster than I am
- You/he/it should be faster than it is
- It should not take work or process to make it happen
- It is not up to me to make it happen. I am a victim...
- AnxietyAnxiety comes from the attitude of unwillingness to be present. Why? Because the mind can't connect to the present. Because the present may be unpleasant.
So the attitude is: one-day, someday... but because the future doesn't exist, and the future is built on the action you are taking today, the future is both uncertain, and certain: more of the same... or worse.
So, we can sum up the attitude: I don't matter, what I do don't matter, I am a victim.
And another aspect of this attitude: whatever is coming: I can't handle it. 2
OK, I can't think of more emotions right now.
Want to help me out? Please post your suggestion in the comments below. No emails on this one.
The comment must be organized like this:
the emotion or behavior (mine or someone else's) is this:
Question: what attitude does it cover?
Let's see if you can follow instructions.
If you can't or won't follow instructions... it covers up the attitude of arrogance... that you know better.
- Notice that the most successful, most famous teachers, hypnotists, gurus, are teaching you to change your emotions, or change your behavior... without ever teaching you that what they are teaching is bogus, doesn't work, but pays their riches.
The reason I love Tai Lopez because he is completely different, at least the stuff I have seen, or listened to.
- If you have attempted to activate self-trust, you see that lack of self-trust is about 50-70% of the anxiety.