Politically correct living, living for someone else’s sake robs you of seeing who you really are.
I am talking about everybody. Empaths are a special case… they really don’t know much until they become conscious empaths.
Life cannot be lived authentically, unless you know who you are.
Authentic living means being the same inside and out. The more you are authentic, the higher your vibration.
So finding out who you are is mandatory if you want to be well, feel well, and do the best with what you got. This is what this article is helping you to do.
- The first step is to be able to know when you feel good, when you feel right, when you enjoy something. Not from memory, but right then and there… In the moment.
- The second step is to be able to feel when you do something well. When there is a rhythm, an ease and grace present when you do that.
- The third step is to be able to feel and note your tiny or not so tiny moments of success.
You need to become a hunter.
Why is this important?
Because life lived out of your natural strengths is a life better lived. Another way to say this: if you leverage your strengths, you get further in living the life you want to live.
My methodology, the Michelangelo method, is mainly chipping away who you are not. But…
The big but is: unless you know the final result you are going for, the David entrapped in the marble, you chip blindly, and the result won’t be a David, but a cripple.
The backbone of the sculpture is the winner in you, David who can.
You have it, everyone has it. You have been denying it permission to show up: your attention has been almost entirely on what you don’t do well.
Of course a whole life will contain activities that you don’t enjoy, aren’t particularly good at, but they are necessary. We’ll call them the grind, and we’ll call them the mundane must.
But backbone is the most important. If your backbone is based on what you are good at, your strengths, your life will be a lot more fun than misery.
So how do you find your strengths? 1
I am borrowing an article I saw, and will add to it…
5-ways-to-pinpoint-your-strengths so you can move towards the good life: success, health, happiness…
This is not my article. You probably will like it more than you like MY articles… I am not very offended.
First you want to get a journal and set aside just a few minutes to write in it every day. Best make it a small journal, so small that you can carry it in your pocket, so you can jot down a reminder when you catch something. By doing this, you’ll be able to capture the clues in your daily life that will point you toward your real strengths. And in the evening, expand on each, by going through the following checklist:
1. Areas of Yearnings…
The things you yearn for are like an internal magnet. You get pulled toward them no matter what. Over the course of your life, those yearnings may become less noticeable – because you or external “advice” make them seem unattainable. But they’re still there. Get present to them and jot them down.
2. Areas of Satisfaction…
Look at the things you did during a day that gave you the biggest emotional kick! The things that left you satisfied and complete. Satisfactions are not fleeting – they form our intrinsic motivation. So that means if it feels good… take note of it.
3. Areas of Rapid Learning…
Watch for the things you catch onto quickly. Or the actions that you can knock out in a hurry. Or just the things you’re just plain good at. Anything that you can (or have previously) internalized quickly is something you want to notice for. Write down what you discovered each day.
4. Areas of Excellence…
You want to take note of your performance. Something you did that you did well. Areas where you performed in an outstanding manner are always a key pointer to your most leverageable strengths. And finally…
5. Areas of Total Performance…
Where do you get into “the zone”? What are you doing when time stops and you’re in that flow state? Total performance is more than just a glimpse of excellence. Or doing something well (as in the last item). These are things that happen consistently. They’re repeatable. And they show up frequently for you. Write them down too.
Do This Every Day
Print (or write out) a copy of this checklist. And then open your journal every day and reflect on each item on this checklist. (If it’s easier, you can work with a pocket notebook you keep with you and just jot things down as you do them.) When you notice something, write it down in as much detail as you need to. Then check that area off your list for that day.
In a week or two, go back through your journal and start looking for patterns.
You’ll begin to see things that you do and areas in your life that you breeze through on a regular basis. Things that you love to do. Things that you’re great at. Things that give you an emotional boost like nothing else.
All of these things are pointing at your biggest strength – your most important leverage point… Your personal strengths!
Here is a little insight into me through some notes in my journal:
I don’t do artificial noise… I actually address the lurking dark, unconscious, or evil below the smooth surface.
I love it. It gives me satisfaction. I am good at it. It’s disruptive, makes me feel alive.
Most everybody, all my life, considered this behavior negative. It’s been the cause of me being beaten, thrown out, fired, ignored.
Used in the wrong environment it is not useful Used as a coach: perfect.
Doing this work alone is, unfortunately, hindered by your habitual way of not knowing what is important and what isn’t… So you may need a partner, an accountability partner, a mentor, or a coach to follow suit and then really know what to do with what you found…
Many of my coaching students are struggling with this exact issue. Because even though this checklist is good… until David is clearly seen, it feels like a struggle… too many other options too many distractions.