I used to think that when you are an avatar, when you are a change-agent, people find you lovely and are attracted to you. I wanted that. I haven’t had a lot of “being liked” experiences.
I used to think that. Never thought that being of high vibration can create bad feeling in people’s hearts.
Don’t misunderstand me, I knew of historical facts, but I never connected them with the fact that the person was high vibration.
Until yesterday.
I knew what really beautiful women share: that they are mostly alone. That people are afraid to approach them. But I am not really beautiful, so I didn’t think it applied to me.
But yesterday drove it all home for me.
I have prepared a list of the fragments I have discovered, fragments of the self. My self…
What am I talking about?
When you are born you are born whole and complete, unless you had an unfortunate in-the-womb experience, and a good 10% of babies have had. I did… in that incident I left 6% or my original self… a fragment of my self.
When you are whole and complete, your energetic signature is the same as all things whole and natural: your self has a perfect torus 1In geometry, a torus (pl. tori) is a surface of revolution generated by revolving a circle in three dimensional space about an axis coplanar with the circle, or donut shape, energetically.
Then life happens and in traumatic incidents you abandon fragments of that perfect self… for shame, for guilt, for condemnation, you leave it. You dis-identify with it. You dis-own it.
Most people I know come to me with 3-10% of their original self.
That little remnant of self is unbalanced, incomplete, can’t be at rest, seeking its missing parts, egging you on… but you only feel the urge, so you go into self-punishing or pleasure seeking directions.
Bottom line: you can’t be joyful, you can’t be happy, you can’t be fulfilled, satisfied, contented with a fragmented self.
So what is there to do?
The job is to identify, forgive, and re-integrate the abandoned fragments of the self.
This is what we do in the Activate Divinity Course. One fragment at a time, one fragment per month.
There is a technology for finding the fragments, and there is a technology to integrate it back into the whole.
The processes that exist in the world are imprecise, and ineffective. I have tried the Theta Healing Method’s process: I guarantee that not more than one out of a thousand can actually benefit from it, a little bit. And those are the ones that have identified, successfully, precisely, the incidents before.
As a true teacher, I am also a student. Not just any student: I am a student of the same course I am teaching.
A true teacher doesn’t already know. Doesn’t already have it… if they do or have, they can’t teach. That is why all the teachers I have studied, teachers of being and attainment sound good, but are lousy teachers.
A good teacher is the one whose student is successful at learning what there is to learn.
Rabbi Akiva, a famous teacher with tens of thousands of students comes to mind. Out of the tens of thousands of students five learned, the rest of them studied.
I love Osho, but muscletest says, none of his students attained.
When a student goes on to become a teacher, you can be almost certain that it is to cover up that they did not attain.
But that is just an aside: let’s continue this topic of integrating the fragments of the self so we can become whole and complete.
In preparation to the Activate Divinity class this coming Saturday, I took one of the fragments I found, and did the process on it.
You would expect that you’ll suddenly experience peace, joy, and self-love… I did.
Instead I was dredged with all the grief, all the sadness also trapped in that fragment.
I know, I know, without actually sharing the particulars, you’ll never be able to get what I am talking about, so I’ll share…
…in part two of this article. I like to string you along. I hope I have made you curious enough to come back tomorrow.
Why come back? Why be curious? Your life depends on it.
You see, you can either continue being fragmented and trying to fill yourself with sex, food, shopping, money, fake love… or you can identify and integrate your missing parts, and need none of those.
Can you imagine when you can just have those “vices” but no urgency, no rush, no hunger, no greed, no lust… just enjoyment?
It is possible only to the completed self.
Now, are you curious? I hope so.
thank you Ann
Sophie, I read some of your posts, write to you, then erase them. I used to wonder why no one commented on some of them. Now I know why. It’s just too much to put into words. Thanks for writing them. The tough ones too.