You are not stupid, you are just making your decisions emotionally
"If you want to live with the masses, think emotionally. If you want to live with the middle class, think positively. If you want live with the world class, think critically." --Steve Siebold
I have been impulsive and hasty as long as I can remember. And I have known myself, by my results, stupid, as long as I remember.
My results in any endeavor, any relationship, and the business of life have been anything but stellar. Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes.
The past 4-5 years I have been paying attention, but bad habits die slowly or never, and I am, for the most part, behaving the same way as I behaved all my life, hasty moves, jumping into conclusions, only to discover moments or days later that I didn't look before I leaped.
I wish I were flawless, but then I would be useless as a teacher: when you are effortlessly good at something, then you can't teach it: you have no distinctions in the area of your expertise. Only when you can go, through your own awareness, from bad to good, that you have something useful to offer to the world that wants to follow you.
This is the main issue, by the way, with many of the famed and revered teachers, like Osho or Eckhart Tolle. They are really nice to read, very nurturing, but impossible to follow. Because they never went from where you are to where they are... they somehow found themselves there, using none of their own effort.
This is the exact reason why I use my own examples of passage, even though most people want to follow an enlightened being, someone who has attained, but someone who can't teach it. I feel way too human for most seekers' taste.
The mystical, mythical, magical thinking of the masses wants two things from you, if you want to become their teacher:
- Prove it to them that they can get to where you are without doing any work. Better yet, do it for them. Some incantations (Christie Marie Sheldon), Law of attraction, some magnets, a prayer, a chakra clearing, Just smile, a blah blah blah, and they will follow you, and throw money at you. I could list the entire arsenal of all the people I have reviewed on this site.
- Behave like you are perfect, that you have it all, smile, laugh, sound holy, etc.
I don't offer either of those, I have flaws, and I am trying to find my way, just like you.
So what do I have to offer that is worth your while to hang out with me?
I have managed to drag myself up from utter misery of an unconscious empath to the level of a conscious empath. 2 I have managed to get out of my mind 90% of the time, and use the mind for what it's for: thinking. Real thinking, not just having thoughts. Thinking to make sound decisions, thinking for planning a course of action, thinking to decide if something is true or false.
I have managed to be self-aware, and aware of others, the environment, of energies, of trends, the root of issues of students, of a lot of things not very relevant for this article.
And I am becoming aware that I am still making most of my decisions without thinking. But more importantly, I got really clear in the past few days, that unless you want to just tread water, and think the same unproductive thoughts that you already thought yesterday, you need to do some looking, with awareness, and with no preconceived notions.
This is why I am writing this article, by the way, to share this discovery.
The possibility of changing habits came up last August, after I read the book, The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg. He offers a method of changing habits that I can teach, that I can follow... but it has one "shortcoming" for most people.
Before you can change anything, you need to catch it. Not just the top of the iceberg, you need to be able to see all of it, the motivation, the emotions, the unconscious thoughts, the whole situation that triggers it.
You can't catch what you can't see, but you can't see what you don't bring awareness to.
Awareness is difficult for people, because awareness is non-judgmental. So, before you can tackle any habit that needs changing, judging from the bad consequences you don't want, you need to change the habit of judgmentalness.
Judgment is, for the most part, a systemic judgment. Systemic judgments have two phases, on, and off. Right/wrong, good/bad, pretty/ugly, clever/dull, stupid/smart, high/low, worthy/unworthy, loved/unloved, etc.
All systemic judgments are societal, cultural, and not-intrinsic, non-inherent. They don't live in the "thing" they live in speaking, in consciousness. All systemic judgments are your enemy if you want to be aware. All systemic judgments are given to you by others. Nothing is inherently bad or wrong, but society taught you to divide the world and people and events to bad and good, and unless you can loosen that fixed way of being, fixed way of compartmentalizing the world, you will never be able to change any habit, because you won't be able to get to the awareness that you need to actually see and catch what you want to change.
I am working on a new Avatar State activator, 'non-judgmental.' I will update this post when it is available.
So far I've caught the following about my hasty behavior habit: I don't want to 3 look before I leap. I have an underlying notion that "I should be ok the way I am, no matter what I do!" and even HAVING TO look is a restriction imposed upon me by others, and others can't be trusted...
Now, why on earth would I have such an unproductive notion? The explanation lies in the Soul-Correction theme I was born with: Forget Thyself. Forget Thyself wants to be the top, the only one, because others can't be trusted. Only I can be trusted... now, laugh with me, out loud, if it weren't horrible, it would be funny.
And when you look, all roots of all bad habits (I think) can be taken back to the Soul-Correction you were born with. And getting crystal clear about what that is and how you can become conscious of it, manage it so it doesn't ruin your life, is what we do in the Soul Correction Workshop.
The only thing that has stood between me and excellence is this hasty habit. Watch me: I can smell my new life, I can taste it, I can feel it... it is as real to me as if it were already mine.
PS: you need to realize that you are listening from inside a different paradigm, so you'll get what I say to match your paradigm. There is no escape, you can't even get glimpses of a higher paradigm unless you get into it. I am showing the path... you need to follow. All the compliments, opinions, judgments you send my way come from your current paradigm: I don't need opinions, etc. I need you to follow suit.
Catch your judgmentalness, consider that your life-defining experience comes from a decision you made from your soul-correction, and unless you learn how it works, no incident, no dyanetics process, no process, whatsoever, will get you out out of your misery and into the happiness that is your birth-right.
This is a brand new discovery. I just saw it today. I had hunches that it may be so, but never actually saw it.
This is why all the work you have done has produced only meager results.
- Paradigms are like concentric spheres with one-way mirror walls, much like the dome over his world, in the movie The Truman Show with Jim Carrey. Watch it if you can. You can see the lower paradigm through the one-way mirror, as if there were no dividing wall, but the person in the lower paradigm only sees the mirror and themselves going on forever. This is why sayings coming from a higher paradigms translate to useless wisdom in your paradigm, much like the quotes on those pictures on facebook: meant to inspire, but mean nothing to you, they come from a higher paradigm where they are true, they are just a nice idea in yours. This is the case with the writings of Osho and Eckhart... sound so good, but how do you get there?
- My vibration used to be 35. In 1985 it was 150, today it is above 700, and often as high as 990... not in the past month though.
- look before you leap