No energy? Likely you are Twitchy Little Bastard… A Marshmallow eater…

This morning I am running on fumes… (or how to increase your Twitchy Little Bastard 1 score)

Some activities fill you up, some activities drain your energy.

One of the most important capacities one can develop is to tell the difference… and start managing one’s energy.

Sometimes you give your energy to another and get back nothing… Maybe money, but money does not fill you up. Money does not give you energy. It may buy groceries… but even groceries only give you physical energy.

The depletion is of psychic energy, of spiritual energy, of intellectual energy.

Your Twitchy Little Bastards score will tell you how well you manage this energy, the energy you need to get things done, to amount to something, to become worth a damn, and to deserve what you want. Low score? I can gamble on saying: you have been running on fumes for so long, you don’t even know what it feels like to be full, nurtured, and well.

And anyone who deals with you for more than an hour will be depleted… because you suck their energy, and then leak it out right away.

Baron Munchausen, one of my favorite characters as a child, and his half-horse comes to mind.

You have a low Twitchy Little Bastards score? You are the half-horse.

What you do with what you hear almost doesn’t matter from this vantage point, what matters is that it doesn’t reflect back to me at all.

My calls with TLB’s are long. Why? Because I am trying desperately to fill them up… but to no avail.

I am sure, regardless of the TLB score, you have people like this around you that are thirsty because they don’t retain any of what you say. Or do. Or give them. Wisdom, love, advice, food, yourself… they don’t even win, while you are used up.

A horrible way to die.

As you probably don’t remember, because you never actually heard it, the TLB is measured on a logarithmic scale.

So a 2 is not double of a 1 on that scale, a 2 is 10 times more.

And a 3 is a hundred times more.

And a 4 is a thousand times more.

I currently have two, a grand total of two people whose TLB score is higher than 1.

If I lived an ordinary life, I would be burned out. But I don’t live an ordinary life: I live a life carefully designed to keep my energy level high… and I make only occasional mistakes.

When I try to give more than the other person can use, when they are a half-horse…

Just like with eating, what starts it is an unpleasant feeling of hunger and an enticing feeling of appetite. And then at some point the appetite and the hunger diminish, to be replaced with the unpleasant feeling of fullness.

All functions of a human who is not corrupted work this way… I was corrupted, and obviously still corrupted to a certain degree: to the degree that the healthy feelings are replaced with the desire trap: to try to help someone who is not willing to be helped, not able to be helped, not ready to be helped.

Being able to detect the other person’s state is possible by gauging what comes back. Like a sonar can tell how deep a well is, or how deep is the ocean.

If nothing comes back… stop. Stop giving, stop selling, stop trying to persuade them. Just stop… in the middle of a sentence. They won’t even notice: they are not there to receive. They may be there to deplete you, but not for themselves.

So what should you do with the TLB 1’s in your life?

If YOU are a TLB 1, then pull your attention back to yourself, and find a way to go to TLB 2.

I tell you what I did. When I started I was a TLB 3. This was about six years ago.

With TLB 3 you can go far. I had all those degrees. I had all those business. I did relatively well with TLB 3. I was miserable, though. and not well.

The practice I chose came from my observation of myself of wanting to jump without looking.

Because the right-brain likes to jump, and I am dominated by the right brain (I am what you call a hidden-left-handed person, I’ll explain later) and I knew the end result of a process without doing the process itself.

  • In any activity where other people are managed, or taught, this is a horrible thing… they cannot follow you.
  • In any learning, not knowing, not wanting to know the steps, will lead you to a lot of failures: I should know, I am an architect. And yet I make decisions from the picture of the finished building (the result) and always forget that I am not willing to build… step by step.

I have spent too many thousands of dollars on this mistake: they were never taken out of the “shrink wrap”… I was unwilling to actually do what it takes to make the things I saw happen: the process.

The process, for a person like me, is sheer madness, terror, and the amount of unpleasant feelings I need to deal with is too much… So I had to build up my tolerance, if I ever wanted to build something, have something valuable, worth having.

I’ve been using Freecell, the solitaire card game all computers come equipped with.

It would be a leak, normally, and it was a leak six years ago.

But I noticed that if I can force myself to look before I leap, I can win more… I, occasionally, did that. It was painful, because all I wanted is to win, do, release the tension that drove me to the game… not hold onto it, and increase it by forcing myself to look.

It’s taken me six years to increase my TLB to 40.

The unpleasant feelings did not go away. They did not become weaker. I actually feel them stronger… but I’ve become stronger. A whole lot stronger. A whole more a person.

Working with students, it is MY JOB to help them find the one practice that is frequent enough and precise enough to be effective to raise their TLB score. I am your Mr. Miyagi… The boy in the movie was the Twitchy Little Bastard, remember him?

It’s all about jumping… or not.

Catching yourself judging? Can you see that judgment is always preceded by comparing? Catch the comparing and drop it… that is a good practice. it will increase your TLB.

Same with explaining, same with asking inane questions, same with lying, same with finding fault, same with eating, same with looking to be entertained. Cell phone, youtube, articles. For some: daydreaming. Sleep. TV.

It is important to work with one thing. You can zoom in on one thing, and don’t get confused.

It takes time. On one hand it reduces a leak, on the other hand it trains your TLB factor.

You will succeed only some of the time. It’s normal. But there will be an increase… in seeming jumps. You need energy, and you need the energy to pool… But if you don’t abandon the project, it will make the biggest difference in your life.

I grew my TLB score to 3 (sounds puny, doesn’t it?) by isolating myself, by setting a schedule that preventing myself from leaking all my energies by social “activities”, immersing myself in activities other people were doing, like dinner, like watching TV, like going out, like being called on the phone.

And all of the 37 point additional increase came from Freecell… boggles the mind, right? A time waster activity as a tool for growth.

You see, everything is useful in some hands, and dangerous in others.

Just like a kitchen knife…

PS: Want to know your TLB score? Unfortunately, I don’t sell that by itself. But you can get your Starting Point Measurements. In the context of “all of you” it will make a lot more sense.

Here is the Starting Point Measurement test. It’s $15, and includes
1. your vibration (1-1000)
2. your overall intelligence, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, body, relationship, etc.
3. the number of spiritual capacities you have
4. your soul correction (your machine) I need your date of birth for this
5. do you have attachments?
6. the level of your health (1-100)
7. the level of your cell hydration (1-100)
8. your relationship to feedback and instruction
9. The level of discomfort you are willing to allow without the urge and the habit of rushing to “fix” it… dispersing, leaking, it. Your TLB score

For explanation of these numbers, please register at

Here is the link to pay with paypal or with a credit card


no energywhen you feel tired even though you haven’t done much, your TLD score may be too low…
chronic fatiguethis may be a health condition, or this may be the result of leaking too much energy, most likely nutritional deficiency
wake tiredif you wake up tired you probably are not healthy, hve a low health number, and maybe an even lower hydration number


  1. TLB – Twitchy Little Bastard; a person who is counterproductively anxious for results. Who has no ability to control his urges…

Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

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