I could not put my finger on the attitude. I could see that it didn't work, I could see that it didn't serve them, but I didn't have a word for it.
Until today, through listening to Step 4 of the 67 Steps.
This step, step 4 is about learning through mentors. Mentors are teachers, but not classroom teachers. One-on-one instruction where the teaching is tailored to you. Where you learn through osmosis. You emulate their whole being, how they approach issues... it is largely nonverbal. 1
Mr. Miyagi makes him paint the fence, wax his fleet of cars, and sand the huge wooden deck in his backyard.
Daniel feels that he is exploited, that he is used. But when push comes to shove, he realizes that the moves he learned are karate defensive moves...
He expected to learn karate differently, and could not recognize learning from his fixed mindset view of learning.
Had he been taughtt the way he expected to be taught, by the end of the movie he would have been dead, or wished he were.
This is one issue that blocks you from learning: you think you should be taught differently. The HOW to be taught.
The other issue I see with people is that they seem to know WHAT they should be taught.
And given your tiny cone of vision, given that you cannot see the big picture, given that you look at life and what you need on the street level and from the mind and through an agenda... obviously you are locked in to the tiny box you see for yourself.
And that tiny box is your prison. A sad prison.
I have said before that at some point, according to muscle testing, humanity started to live on the Tree of Knowledge.
On the Tree of Knowledge everything is set, known, and it is either good or bad. Systemic rules.
One of the phenomena that starts to dominate people is being controlled through words, words that trigger emotions. Bad emotions. Words with "bad" connotations, one could say. 2
The best way to understand a human is to know that humans are guided by feelings, feelings of needs. This, being guided by feelings worked well as long as we lived on the Tree of Life, and our feelings were a good indicators of what is out there, what can be perceived by our senses, and also a good indicator of what is needed inside: rest, eating, drinking, companionship, safety, etc.
This, the words, separate us from reality and makes us easy to manipulate.
Orators, like Hitler can create negative, angry, vengeful emotions, or enthusiasm and joy... All unreality, coming purely from words.
And the world, because we don't know this fact, that words, the noises, the inner noises and the outer noises are just puff... hot air, we don't realize that we don't have to react to every word we hear, or think.
It is useful to say that a human has a self and a not-self. The not-self is highly reactive, jumpy, and is a noise hearer and a noise maker.
It is so loud and so dominant, that you, a human, have a hard time to know who you are. Because the not-self is not you. When you look into your behavior, into the emotions you feel, you can only find out what the not-self is. You have never been you.
When you can, with a lot of patience and a lot of presence, you can see that most of the things you hear are not-self, and almost all the feelings you experience are the reactions of the not-self to words. If you do this diligently, you can get to a place where there is a clear separation between you and the not-self. Where you can watch the not-self rant and rave, and it is a show you can watch, or not watch. You can go about doing the things you want to do, you need to do. You can start paying attention to the things you want to pay attention to. And not be jerked left and right and up and down, like before, by the not-self and its noise.
Language is just language. Attempting to create symbols for things that exist.
But it is not working. Language is the cause of all misery. Not the words, but how your not-self reacts to them. Indoctrinated by the culture that is hellbent on enslaving you.
Language wedges itself between you and reality, between you and what is.
A virtual world with no contact with reality. A prison.
Gurus, politicians are masters of manipulating you with words. Separating you from yourself. Playing you masterfully like a musical instrument.
If you want to be free, you need to learn to distinguish yourself from the words, and their emotional content. Half of our words are now on the black-list, and if you use them, people frown. Let them.
You cannot live a full life, full of joy, full of productivity, health, and fulfillment if you are trying to live in the tiny prison given to you by the "good" words.
Life is not like that, and what you are living is not life.
Chickens raised in large enclosed rooms with artificial light and manufactured food... that is the life you live.
And then you feel unhappy and come to me, and yet tell me what words to use or not to use to teach you.
But it was the words that made you unhappy... Can you see the oxymoron?
I bet you can't... You are now a trained chicken.
I am sorry, unless you can see... I can't help you. You are too far gone.
But if you have gotten a glimpse... then you can start gently and surely to liberate yourself, and start to live in the light and build a life for yourself, a life that is worth living, a life with joy, health and fulfillment.
It is not hard... but it is alien to the chicken factory. Because it is Freedom.
PS: if the concept still doesn't make sense, then consider that this is so new, that I am having difficulty verbalizing it in a way that it can be understood. So please don't just run away... hang around. I'll get it right. My students are getting it, but they spend a lot more time with me... they have that advantage.
If you want, please listen to my latest podcast...
- By the way, it's taken me 16 months to seriously consider picking a mentor or two... to emulate. In every other area I had some results... in this one I just got to considering it... this is an 18 month schedule, not instant results...
- Marker feelings: This is a relatively new insight, in parallel examined by Antonio Damasio and Margoczi Gyozo. I haven't read Damasio's books, but have read both books by Margoczi... Neither of them are able to get to the crux of the matter, in my not so humble opinion, because neither of them are empaths. But they are in the neighborhood, so it's worth reading their books, especially Margoczi's. My theory is based on Margoczi's, that words, read, spoken, heard, or thought, are associated with emotions and awaken them when encountered. But the part of you that experiences the emotions is the not-you part, the part that lives on the Tree of Knowledge, and is separated from reality.