The unspoken price of happiness

This article is not politically correct, and you'll probably hate it... I am OK with that. I am even OK if you hate me... 1

I've been up since midnight.

Some nights even the most effective energy audio won't help...

I am OK now, but I'll probably be tired during the day.

Just before I got up, a few hours ago, my mind was churning a concept: what is happiness.

This is what I came up with: happiness is capturing enough value with what you like to do and are good at to make a living.

But there is a caveat: if what people are willing to pay for is just a promise... then of course the result is wretchedness, even if you get rich selling it.

This concept, capturing value is probably new to you: it was new to me when I heard it, and it still feels new to me.

We throw the word "value" around a lot, but like with other words, we have no idea what we are talking about.

So when I am talking about capturing value, I am talking about doing something that causes money to change hands.

But I could talk about love, and friendship, and request... they are all about capturing value... value for another.

As a salaried worker you may get paid, but the value you produce is between the employer and you... from the point of view of the consumer you are just a cog in the machine.

What does that mean? It means that you don't generate enough value for an end user to pay for it, because elements of value are missing.

But whatever you do, unless you do what you do with joy, unless it's satisfying, unless you would be willing to do it without money if you didn't need to make a living, happiness is not the result: the result is, at best, dutifulness. Earning a living.

Capturing value joyfully makes you a producer. A producer of value.

The number of producers in any population is very small. Why? The rest only pretends. The rest wait for happiness to descend upon them... they see no part in it themselves.

My guess is that our upbringing makes us a moocher. The culture, micro and macro... The memes, the slogans, religion (love your neighbor as yourself is most toxic there).

The moocher's most relevant characteristic is that a moocher feels entitled.

The expression: It is my due... I have found in every language I remember.

You get what is coming to you... because it is your due.

So you take people and situations for granted, no need to appreciate, no need to deserve, no need to earn, no need for anything... It is yours.

Of course that is not how life works, so entitled people are mostly pissed, angry, and "personally offended."

I used to be personally offended.

But when I expressed it with words, it was the most ridiculous thing, and I could not stop laughing.

It is a colossal misunderstanding of how life works, and I could see how taking this misunderstanding for truth made me miserable.

  • Parents are supposed to love their children... who said so? You did? That doesn't make it so.
  • Lovers are supposed to be faithful.
  • Friends are not supposed to stab you in the back.
  • Your grades are supposed to be good, after all you studied!

Baah, baah, baah.

Guaranteed to make you miserable. Even if you are surrounded by self-sacrificial lambs, and other moochers. Your soul knows it... and your soul will surely make you miserable... it's the soul's job.

When I test which Bach Energy expresses this entitlement most, I find that Yew and Peacock... Desire for the self alone... at the expense of others... and the soul pain of living life so out of sync with life.

If you feel, if you consider yourself entitled, on any level, your facial expression is the downward curling mouth... you feel like a victim, you act like a victim, and you want life to give you your due.

And your overwhelming sense of life is "there is something wrong here"... and of course it needs to be fixed.

That people need to pay for their wrongdoing, parents for not protecting you, not taking care of you, not making you an automatic winner.

That spouses, boy friends, friends, teachers... no one is good enough, because they have all betrayed you... they never gave you what is due to you.

That society, the government, the medical establishment, the army, god, all enemies... all traitors, and you are the sweet smelling rose by virtue of having been victimized.

That your husband is having fun while you take care of things? How dare he?

That a merchant is making a profit on your purchase? How dare he?
That your sister stops giving you alms while she has a hard time paying her rent?

This last one was, by the way, what triggered this whole conversation.

My little brother had his birthday yesterday. To the youngest in the family everyone looks like they got what they have for nothing, no work, no suffering... So the youngest in the family is the most entitled.

But, interestingly, my brother's behavior with me created the "personally offended" reaction in me...

This time I didn't laugh. I got really quiet.

After all I have the power to take responsibility for supporting him for years at my own detriment.

It is not his fault... I could have said no.

And that helped me snap out of it... and write this article.

With nothing in the way of seeing clearly.


  1. The American Constitution, the ground rules of this nation, sets it down that you have the right to the pursuit of happiness. This article talks about what happiness is meant by the Constitution of the United States of America, and what it doesn't...

    And if you are listening, instead, to the wretched Indian gurus or the copy cats in any country, you are missing what causes happiness... happiness is not something that comes to you... you earn happiness... with the pursuit of it.

    The United States was the first country that said that you have the right to pursue your happiness... the way I show it in this article... whereas all other countries told their inhabitants that unless you were born a certain caste, a certain rank... you have NO RIGHTS. India is on of those countries...

    And you are stupid if you want to learn from them how to become happy... Hell, I know the truth hurts. But it can set you free... unless you continue being stupid.

Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

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