Everyone and their brother says that connecting with people is the area of life where you have the most pleasure and happiness, and the most discord, and unhappiness.
Given my childhood, I am afraid of people, I am afraid of pain, and I am very reluctant to even have people around me.
Too much pain... and yet, surprisingly, I do crave unstructured human interaction, to a small degree.
Especially at times like this... Life is too hard for us... lol. I stumbled on the ebook this morning: "The Woman Men Adore...and Never Want To Leave"
Tai says many times in his 67 steps program: find a mentor who is 10 times what you want to be... in the area of life where you want to improve.
I am a mindset/health/raise your vibration mentor... and I may be able to help there. I am also a good mentor for most anyone, when it comes to eating according to what your body will get best with. And I may be a good mentor when it comes to living a life of fulfillment.
I am not a good mentor when it comes to money, any aspect of money.
I am not a good mentor when it comes to relationships: it has been an area of struggle for me all my life.
This morning I was looking at my spam folder... and an email caught my eyes. The subject line was: Do you know what YOUR man is thinking??
And looking at the recent "wave" of resentment of local men towards me... I was hooked. I am in no way consideering dating, I am 70 years old, but being liked would be nice. Being welcome would be nice.
And in spite of my efforts... that is not the result I am producing with people in my life. Not even close.
I wanted to ask.
Does your man's behavior totally confuse you
Saying he's going to call but then...
Bob explains a lot of men's very weird behavior.
And he reveals how you can use all of this behavior to your advantage.
Find Out How To Understand Your Man Here
and I love the part where he talks about The Man Repellent In Existence
I bought the course. I already see why I am not liked. What is unattractive about me... In fact what is repellent about me.
I needed this wake-up call.
There is one book that is for people already in relationship, or married.
I haven't read that, but I can feel it is also really good.
So if this is of any interest, go and get the book.
It's $47. I did not buy the videos and other books. I wanted to see what I am getting first. And how do I do with the information I did get.
It's not some flimsy thing... I do recommend it.
Here is the link, shortened for me to track how many people respond.
Followup: what did I get out of reading this book?
After I finished this article, almost ready to publish, I went to my Tuesday exercise class. That is my most social experience of the week...
There, I caught myself getting sappy, getting loud and obnoxious, then sad and needy.
The "Witness" 1 was watching my dancing feet and my sourpuss face together. Cognitive dissonance... the two didn't go well together in the same frame.
Then it heard 2 the inner voice saying: "Nobody loves me... Nobody will ever love me... I am worthless! Baaah!"
I swiftly identified as the "Heather" Bach Energy®, the energy of the needy child... And I said "to hell with it" laughed and started to have fun again. Exercising is fun.
Now, why am I sharing this with you? Because when you get clear and practiced even in only a few distinctions, like hearing the voices in your head as not YOU speaking, hearing what is said for what it is... b.s., you can snap out of any trap IT placed you in, and start living your life joyfully, purposefully, and free.
Every emotion (every single one of them) is a marker feeling... meaning, they come on the heels of some words, some speaking. The speaking needs to be heard... as the cause of the feeling. And 99% of that speaking is b.s., simply not true, or simply not useful.
What does this have to do with relationships?
Relationships with people is the "playground" most stacked with traps like this, with attitudes that don't attract, with behaviors that repel.
I do recommend this course. It is an eye opener. But it works best in conjunction with the clarity my work brings, the distinctions, the patterns, the principles...
I think that the most important one is the Amish Horse Training Method: being able to recognize when the voice speaking in your head is not you.
It takes practice, and it takes discernment. And asking the question: is this useful? Is this taking me closer to living the good life in health, wealth, love and happiness? If not, it is probably not me, and it is probably useful to ignore...
And if you have zero influence on your attention: what to listen to, what to ignore, then nothing can help you, including this excellent book.
So what should you do now? Go back to the Amish Horse Training Method and practice it.
And make sure you start restoring your integrity.
Without integrity nothing works... Integrity is an inside job: between you and you. If you have no integrity, then you won't listen to yourself, and you become a puppet of the Dark Side... the source of all those voices you hear in your head.
As you saw above, being able to identify the energy of that particular needy, attention seeking behavior I demonstrated at the exercise class as Heather Bach Energy was really useful.
Every person has a number of habitual energies, Bach Flowers, that are triggered by the Voice, the voice in your head.
It is useful, very useful to get acquainted with them so when they show up you recognize them. Every one of them is harmful to your health, wealth, love and happiness. Without knowing what is going on, you can't manage yourself to sane behavior, you can't master your emotions.
So, for a limited time, if you send me the receipt that you bought the course, I'll gift you with your own Bach Profile, that I normally sell for $35. It is a list of the Bach Energies that are habitual, and habitually rob you of being attractive, successful, calm, and happy.
I get paid a commission if you buy the book through my link.