To be able to love life, to do fulfilling work, you need to know and organize your life around what is special about you.
I just acknowledged a woman for what she wanted to be acknowledged for.
I have known her for some time, but it turns out: I didn't know her at all. The organizing principle was missing, so I added my opinion to organize her around in my mind: scared.
But it turns out that she moved from one country to another to start a new life, away from a husband she no longer wanted. Start a new life without a support network, from scratch.
Knowing that about her I can support her more effectively, because now I know that she can. She has done it before, she can do it again... because that life experience is a lot like starting and running a business... no safety net, no real support, no umbilical cord, no running back to mama.
I am going to use myself as an example:
I may have an abundance of things I feel special, or others would say I am special,
Others' opinion doesn't matter. What YOU say matters. This is important! We are listening in to your Self... with capital S.
The conversation I had the other day with the woman from Syracuse has proven to me that what others think about me is none of my business... as in: it is showing me from their vantage point... and living a life to please others is a life not worth living. I think this is what happened to many comic geniuses, Robin Williams, or Jim Carrey... Robin Williams killed himself, Jim Carrey re-invented himself. 1
You want to be the one who re-invents himself or herself. OK?
So, back to me:
I have found that I have a unique ability to hold, manage, and keep lots of plates in the air spinning... in every area of life. That includes 20-30 acquantances, even if they are present all at the same time.
I remember their names, their stories, their pains, their pleasures... and it is fun for an hour or two a week. But it is empty, for me. It is fun, like an exercise. But not what I want my life to be about.
It's taken me a lot of time, many decades, to develop this capacity, it is useful, but only as a tool.
So, if not that, what is special about me that others may not know, but I can and want to build a life on and around?
The fact that I can connect to any person, or nearly any object at will, if I see their picture or if I have seen their picture, is unique about me. I don't have to use my mind to imagine, visualize, or throw a cord at them. I just connect... is a special thing about me.
The fact that I can connect to Source, whatever that is, and create a "threesome" is another unique thing about me.
And the fact that I can completely do this from nothing, including not even feeling my body or my self is also unique.
And that I can muscle test questions about the person or the thing inside this threesome... and trust the answers I get, that is unique.
THE ONE UNIQUE THING
If you look at the many things I do to grow, to become a better person, to restore and restore and restore my integrity and authenticity: these are all serving the ONE UNIQUE THING I can give the world... so I can be even better at it.
Instead of trying to be everything for everyone.
Now, I can hear your objection: "But Sophie, there is nothing special about me" and you may be right. And you may be just missing the point.
It is so natural to you, that you miss it.
It is often a fault... a fault you have. Really.
I once wrote an article about the gift you have to give is connected to what is wrong with you...
The woman who built a whole life on teaching this was Debbie Ford. I have two of her books... I'll put them into the subscribers area... please remind me. If you are clueless, it is worth reading those.
Now, let me talk about a few issues that can rob you from the results of this inquiry, finding yourself:
1. You stubbornly insist on something that is a vehicle, not you... or a dream... not you. You'll find a racket hidden there somewhere.
You are not in touch with You... because your mind has already decided.
But a path is not what we want to talk about. We want to talk about You... what is it that You bring to life that is special FOR YOU.
I use my exercise class for something else: I watch people's faces for the sudden appearance of joy.
It's temporary and fleeting, but it shows that there is a person there somewhere, and that person just got touched...
2. You feel trapped in resistance and struggle. Then look where you resist from. It might just be your unique contribution to life, or your unique ability to see through the b.s.! Don't discard the baby with the bathwater!
Stick with this exercise. Submit your findings to me, if you want. I may be able to hear you... and strengthen your connection to You.
The main issue with this exercise, again, is being able to see the forest for the trees.
- The forest is the You, the uniqueness.
- The trees are all the activities, all the good and bad things, all the days, all the trials and tribulations that we all go through. You are the forest... inside which all those trees do their thing.
Just went way over your head?
Try, maybe, to read it again, and ask the question: what would I like to be acknowledged for?