How to take care of your emotions, the emotions that take care of you?

What takes care of you… that you can take care of?

I have told you how enamored I am with the principle “take care of what takes care of you.” 1

What I don’t elaborate about in that article, is how do you know if something takes care of you or not. How do you know if you CAN take care of something or not?

  • Especially because many modalities ask you to stop thinking, for example. Can you do that?
  • Or they ask you to think positive… don’t even sin in your thoughts, feel different, be happy, be appreciative, and things like that.

Do you have the power to take care of those?

Good question. Because depending on where you invest your energies, your life will get better or it will get worse.

In the movie The Piano is a remarkable 1993 movie about a mute young woman who is “sold” for a wife to a New Zealand rancher. Her only self expression was playing the piano. Don’t want to give it all away, but the part you want to pay attention to is the very end, when she can continue playing the piano AND learn to speak…

She took care of what took care of her. Remarkable film. Holly Hunter got an Oscar for her performance, and I learned big lessons from her.

As a rule, you can take care of what belongs to you. What you can own.


In essence the only thing that truly belongs to you is what you do, what you say, what you honor, what you pay attention to.

  • Your attitude belongs to you through the words you speak.
  • Your emotions belong to you through the words you speak.
  • Your happiness belongs to you through your attitudes through the words you speak…

You see the process.

The results don’t belong to you… they have to go through many “translators” but your actions, your focus, the amount of power you put into each action do belong to you.

So, seeing this chain that always involves your action, what can you do to change your emotions, your affect, and change your attitude with which you do things?

The one thing that Esther Hicks teaches that I find useful is this process.

She uses a 20-level affect guide, and a simple process, all words, that done correctly, reliably raises you affect. The same process, I trust, will also change your attitude.

It takes time, but it’s worth it. It is also very suitable for beginners.

For more advanced students who have been working with me for a while, I recommend internalizing that all emotions are marker feelings.

Marker feelings automatically arise from words spoken internally. The more practiced you are in finding out what you said, the less time it will take to shift your affect/attitude.

And the fastest and most advanced method is what I use: I ask: “should there be a reason for me to feel this way?” And if no, I let the feeling go. Or alternatively I ask; “Is it useful to feel this way?” And because it is never useful to feel any odd way, any marker feeling, I just let the feeling go.

99% of fear is marker feeling, 1% warns you of a real danger. Anxiety is, in essence, fear.

If your internal speaking doesn’t add logs to the fire, most marker feelings die out. Anger, fear, jealousy, even greed.

But first you need to learn with Esther’s method to see that indeed all emotions, all affects are marker feelings.

Once you are really good at that method, you can graduate to the more advanced method.

Just remember to practice it diligently. This is the most important work you can EVER do. It renders you from being an effect, a hapless victim of your internal voices, to someone who is a cause, a creator, godlike.

This is not self-reflection, navel gazing, or meditation. This is real work to knock you conscious.

The Science of Getting Rich cannot be successfully be operative in your life without this.

Because this is new and unfamiliar and maybe silly sounding for most people, only one in a million has been able to really benefit from that science… a science that operates on sound laws.

Now, warning: even though the Emotional Guidance Scale 3 is a good tool… but warning: every tool is as good as the person who uses it.

Unless you get good at words, it will not do what you need it to do.

Expressing what you feel will depend on your clear vocabulary. If your current vocabulary/clarity is 300, it will be hard work, and it will be difficult.

You want to train to understand the words more clearly, and to learn words that are more accurately express your emotional state/affect.

I am planning to do training webinars… NOT FREE… on doing this work. If you don’t want to pay for it, you will be forever stuck in the powerless state you now are.

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  1. One irate customer was complaining yesterday about my site being difficult to navigate.

    I started to wonder if my site takes care of me… hm. Great question, isn’t it?

    Then I muscle tested it because I wasn’t sure… If it takes care of me, then it is a priority to spend my creativity on redesigning the site… and that didn’t feel good to me.

    Muscle test says: no, it doesn’t take care of me. Just like your house doesn’t take care of you. Your job doesn’t take care of you. Even your husband doesn’t take care of you. So what you consider “take care of you” in the context of the Universe is not what takes care of you.

    • Your brain does belong to you!
    • Your attitude does belong to you!
    • Your health does!

    So as you see, this is not an ordinary distinction.

  2. this is the same rule for responsibility. But because the word responsibility is so vague, and so jargon, I refrain from using it, because you’ll pretend to know what I am talking about, while you don’t… And, by the way, that is one of the things you can take care of: making sure you know what a word means… look it up, verify, ponder it… or your accurate vocabulary and your clarity remains low, and your chances for a happy life are going to remain the same.
  3. Chapter 22 in the book Ask and it is given

Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

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