What does they mean: ownership, deserving, and being equal to what life throws at you?

This is a long article... it explains some things everyone has misunderstood... and chances are, most will still misunderstand after reading this article...

As I have said before, one of the best ways to find out what a word REALLY means is to see how other languages say it.

Your vocabulary, your accurate vocabulary is the level of the truth value of your knowledge, of your thinking.

And judging from the puny numbers most people have for accurate vocabulary, you can take from sure that your understanding of the world, of reality, of what is being told to you, of what you read, is equally puny, equally pitiful.

I don't know what you understood until you ask a question, and then I know why my amazing articles can't, won't make a dent, won't do anything for you.

One of these words, owning, ownership is such a word.

If your accuracy is good about it, it is a transformative word. If it is what most people have... it makes no difference.

The fact is, that you are sure that you understand the words correctly...

Like the word "deserve" or "deserving" you think they are a value proposition: you are good, therefore you deserve to be happy... or some other happy horseshit.

In Hungarian deserving is tied to an accomplishment... namely work. The Universe doesn't decide who is deserving and who is not... no matter what the bible says. No, you deserve a result and the accompanying reward through work, work that may earn the reward... and may not.

Deserving is a "bookkeeping" word. An accounts receivable. Not all accounts get paid, not even near.

The Universe may be fair (who decides? lol) but society, people aren't.

I took a peek at a TV show on youtube yesterday, thank you Kawa, of an investor's attempts to save people from ruin... people who thought they deserved success.

But all those people courted success, but didn't really know what they were doing... they had only a good product, or a good location... not all the skill it takes to really earn success.

Consider that you are, in essence, a business, You Inc. without the tools to succeed as a business. No idea how things really work, no idea how to do most anything, no capacities, no skills, no efforts even.

I am talking to YOU. If you are reading it, the chances that I am absolutely correct about you, about you being a failing You Inc. business thinking that you should succeed, is near 100%. In fact, muscle test shows that only one out of a million is equipped to succeed.

But why? I have seen the why in a student's question the other day... was it yesterday?

In one of my articles I share my story from 1988, when my Center Manager attempted to fire me. I said: you can't fire me from MY JOB, you can only fire me from YOUR JOB...

I OWNED that job... So my student saw, that she should attempt to OWN her jobs, so she can stop being terrified of getting fired...

She wrote to me on a private platform:

If I feel like I can get fired from something (even a relationship or a goal I'm pursuing) it's a sign that I don't really own it. I put the power in someone else's hand. If I can manage to shift my attitude to "nothing can keep me from doing this or being a certain way" I can really own something.

When you push me really hard here I got worried a few times about getting kicked out of the program. So apparently I don't really "own" it yet. But after contemplating giving up (hey - it is easy, right?) I decided that it wouldn't keep me from working on myself. Nothing would keep me from following the blog or reading the recommended books.

I think there are three things that nothing could keep me from doing (or at least trying), no matter if I suck at it or if others try to keep me away: working with horses, raising my son and working on becoming a human being. I might be totally off, but this is what I feel.

But here is what ownership means...

In Hungarian the word ownership and the word characteristic are the same word. Which indicates to me that in Hungarian you would not think someone can fire you from something you own... after all that is who you are. They can destroy what you own, they can strip you of what you own, but they have to do it with force...

I am Jewish. An ethnicity that has been, traditionally, only allowed to own what they could do, what was inside their head.

Pretty much the same relationship as the Hungarian word indicate: part and parcel with you.

I owned that job back in 1988, because I was doing it, alone, with talent, exuberance, commitment, dedication, and, believe it or not, on my own dime.

I racked up a 270 dollar phone bill by the time I filled all the positions... hundreds of long distance calls... by the deadline.

That is ownership.

In American English, I think you would call that accountability... the buck stops with you.

You are equipped to do every job and you will.

I am surrounded with people who can't or won't do 90% of the jobs in their lives, in their businesses, because they are not accountable, or in essence don't own their lives.

But not just my clients and students are like that.

I have recently encountered an amazing Australian entrepreneur, whose second in command, an employee, came up with the idea of teaching and training people to do some of the things they, as a company, can do.

The entrepreneur said: ok, go for it.

But an employee is an employee... they are not equipped with the skills and the knowledge of a business owner, or an entrepreneur. They expect things to come to them because... because... because they deserve it.

So this dude expects prospects, clients, students to recognize the value of the course... without him doing effective sales and marketing... Actually typical of an employee.

The course "deserves" to be well accepted, but people will be people: they need to be sold.

  • If you cannot sell... you won't make money.
  • If you cannot show how it will change your client's life, you won't make money
  • If your about-me score is high (anything above 30% is too high) you won't make much money.

And you'll be pissed... Permanently pissed. Slighted. Offended.

But all the work you may have invested doesn't compensate for a missing action, a missing skill, for something that you didn't do.

The culture of humans... homo sapiens, puts understanding on a pedestal.

But understanding doesn't earn you more in the game of life, than the starting position: you are now poised to actually start appropriating the knowledge.

I have a private student who came to me with dreams of becoming a billionaire.

It took me a whole year to disabuse him from the mistaken belief that he could start his journey to billionaire...

And then, after that first year we found a path to make him first own his own business, not just in name, but actually be able to be accountable for his results, for his state of mind, for his time.

And then we built on that solid foundation... we created activities that produce value, to the same clients he already had, without even the thought of cashing in on those values... like every Tom, Dick and Harry would have.

In his pitch, even free services need to be sold! so he is practicing, among others, effective selling... in his pitch I trained him to set the context right: his report back to me, he says to the client: "look I help businesses and go through the clutter in their business and find at least $1000/month they can earn by finding some gaps and because you are my client I want to do this for free with you. Oh. Actually, this serves me more than it serves you, so don’t thank me ok."

His client is sold, and he is now practicing the skill of selling his service, and practicing the conversations, and finding that elusive $1,000 a month they left on the table.

He still has his training wheels on, but eventually they will come off...

And then he'll have a whole different situation where he'll have the option to get paid for his expertise...

Most people lose the ball there... they want to get to the money too fast... and overestimate their own contribution.

Value is not what you give: value is what is received. Somewhat up to the giver, but not entirely.

For example, my Cyber Monday offering, the Second Phase Activators Course can raise your vibration to 400 by activating the 100 missing feelings/capacities...

The people I have spoken with, so far, think nothing of it... They think they may need a feeling here and there...

They also think that they bought hundred feelings and they will be dumped into them, and they will magically have them... OWN them...

But that is NOT the nature of reality.

You need to earn, you need to appropriate everything you want.

You need to download the new feeling into your whole system at least six times for it to get a chance to take... You have to be able to feel them, to see others feel them.

I have some students struggling with one emotion to activate... one hundredth of that course.

They struggle because in order to feel what they can't feel, they need to give up being the center of their universe, give up being stingy, give up superiority, give up being judgmental.

Here is an example I have shared before: the feeling of being prosperous... There is no Prosperous, or even prosperity in reality, it is a word that says that you feel that you have enough. That you command enough resources to feel that you have enough.

So in the 1987 "More Money" course, the course started with asking the participants to mill... and meet others in the course, and say "I see that you are prosperous". And the answer of the addressed person needed to be: "Thank you for noticing".

The instructions were: LIE AUTHENTICALLY.

What the heck does that mean?

I tell you what it does: you need to know that it's there, or could be there... except that YOU can't see it. It is invisible to you. Your own prosperity or the prosperity of another...

So you need to speak from that knowledge that it is YOU who cannot see, and not as if you were reporting on what you see... Because then it would be just lying.

Obviously that course, The More Money workshop, attracted people who didn't feel prosperous... so those first few minutes were the most confronting minutes of our lives... But those minutes pointed to the invisible... and the possible.

I have less money than I had back in 1987, and yet I feel prosperous 70% of the time... the only things that I deem not enough is not having wheels, and not having dental care... otherwise I am prosperous: I have everything I need.

Returning to the Second Phase Activators Course: 100 feelings, this process I describe about prosperity, feeling prosperous, a 100 times.

You need to activate 7-8 of those feelings to hit the 400 vibration... Less than 10 people are that high on the planet at this time.

At the time when I first delivered this course back in 2012, one person hit 300 vibration through activating just one of those missing feelings. And even now, six years later, there is something special about her... it never went away.

I am sure she isn't conscious of it... just like you aren't conscious of what you don't feel... for you it isn't missing.

But most of those 100 feelings are missing for all of you...

The client who is supposed to be struggling with feeling being enough, feeling equal to life, could go from 100 to 200 vibration, from 70% about-me score to less than 10%... will he? Probably not.

He is still only interested in what is visible, in what he can see... and the feeling is not in the visible... so he is looking for his lost keys under the street light, not where he lost them... like the drunk in the joke.

This, feeling enough, feeling equal to what life throws at you, is a missing for almost every person I see.

And the ones that have been, maybe forever, feel enough, once what life throws at them is new... they don't feel equal to it, and get pissed, or discouraged.

I am old, and have the opportunity to watch old people... and of course some young people.

Unless you feel enough, equal to what life throws at you, you probably won't even consider learning things you need to learn so you can now beat life at its own game.

I am doing it in my person right now, by the way. Chronic pain in my knees... can't even fall asleep at night for longer than an hour or so...

Unless you take on your life as your own, as something you are accountable for, you'll always be a victim...

Being equal to life is an attitude in addition to being a pleasant feeling. The attitude of being a perpetual learner, without complaining that life changes the game.

Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

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