What you don't know is that if you are not allowed to take, you won't be allowed to give... the ultimate stingy... If you are not allowed to live according to your nature, you will do cartwheels to avoid it... even if and even when your nature would take you where you want to go.
There is a major difference between you and your dog. Your dog is happy, and you are not.
It is worth looking into that, because all the psychology articles, all the books, and all the therapy sessions will be un-needed once you get what it is about you that makes you unhappy.
While you, seemingly without any scolding, collapse into yourself, frequently, and stop playing, stop wagging your tail, and don't want to do anything... or if yes, want to do escapist activities, eating, talking, binge watching... anything to take your mind off the invisible scolding.
Humanity's fall from grace (grace as in "grace and ease" also known as happy) happened when language was used to tell people, explain people how their true nature, how their natural inclination was wrong, bad, evil, and how they should abide by some rules that are made up to corrupt humanity's self-image, self-view... and make them all a slave, voluntarily or involuntarily.
Fall of man, Christian term used to describe the transition of the first man and woman from a state of innocent obedience to God to a state of guilty disobedience.
Fall from grace: a situation in which you do something that makes people in authority stop liking you or admiring you.
I have a man in my street who used to have a gorgeous Hungarian bred German Shepherd. He walked him several times a day to my end of the street where there is a big round field where dogs can play...
The man carried a stick with him, every time, and beat the dog when he did anything he didn't like, which was whenever she (the dog's name was Ginger) did anything consistent with what a dog likes to do... like eat grass.
And, or course, the dog was bullied, and dogs don't like it.
I must have liked it too... when I was around 20, I double dated two brothers with my friend Panni (we are still friends!) and I remember making a decision that the brother I was assigned to (lol) didn't really care about me, because he didn't tell me to stop smoking. Until this day that amazes me.
Of course I was lucky, my parents never actually told me what they expected of me, and never told me what they expected me not to do either... Even when I was beaten, which was every day, if my memory is accurate (probably not, lol) they never actually let on what I did wrong, except a few times...
So I learned this way not to ever ask for what I needed, because that invited serious beating. I learned that eating according to what my body told me what a no-no, invited serious beating.
One of the elementary school teachers called me amoral, which sounded very derogatory, but I can tell you today: it saved me from becoming a sheep.
You can start to see why your dog isn't unhappy, but you are.
Your dog doesn't have language, and you do. And language tends to work like the stick of the guy with the German Shepherd... hit you every time you cross the line of the cultural morality.
Ginger didn't think he did anything wrong. I promise. He thought she wasn't allowed to do what she wanted to do. It made no sense to her... but there it was... the stick came down, so he stopped. For now. But it didn't kill, didn't change his nature: he managed to remain a dog.
Your "love" means: I hate most everything this person does, but some things I approve of... ugh.
Your care means: I will turn you into an obedient sheep who can't tell where they are, who they are, what they are supposed to do.
The more a nation is dominated by language, the more miserable they become.
I speak about your case in other articles.
Your case says something about you that violates the moral code of your family, your religious group, your society.
And then you alternate between trying to prove it wrong, or trying to prove it right. It now forms your box, and you have stopped living in reality, trusting your inner inclinations, and live entirely dominated by what you think others expect of you.
Here are a few sentences:
- You can't be trusted to do the right thing, to follow your own "nose".
- You are nothing. Inconsequential, you will never amount to anything.
- You weren't even supposed to be born... you should be dead.
- You were supposed to be a boy. You are a ugh girl, worthless
- You were, maybe, an excuse for a child, until your brother was born. Now you are nothing...
- You are stupid and have no value for anyone
- etc. etc. etc.
You, as a baby, see how others treat other children, and learn fast the contrast, and learn that you are not what they want, not what they wanted.
Your soul correction will tell you exactly how to interpret what you see.
Your dog never gets a sentence... even if each dog has a temperament, and a personality... but their inner needs, inner inclinations, their "dog-ness" wins every time.
In the Playground program we are removing the tyranny of the words, the rules, the sentence, to the degree that you can get in touch with yourself.
If you see yourself irreparable, you probably won't do the work it requires. You could... but you won't.
You'll quit. You'll blame it on me... of course, but that doesn't set you free. What sets you free is seeing that you are obeying some words, some sentence (the judicial meaning) and are stuck with it.
Remember: you can either be right or happy. You can either be rich or right... You can either be free or right
Whether you yearn to be free, rich, or happy, catch that you are trying, insisting on being right about something or someone, and put a tiny bit of doubt there... That tiny bit of doubt will let you return to the path that will lead you back to yourself, and being able to do what you want, what you want really. What will make you happy, free, and rich.
What are you right about? Everything...
Why be right? So that others can be wrong. It gives you an illusion that you are better and that gives you an illusion that you have redeemed yourself. From what? From that original sentence.
But it is an illusion... the opposite is true. As long as you are right, you are still in the same darn tiny box... trying to prove THERE that it doesn't exist.
So watch out to being, feeling right... and remember that when you are right, someone, something needs to be wrong...
I told you it was going to be difficult to escape. And now you can see it really is... The case is a shape shifter, this time it came to make you feel right... that is the same thing wearing different disguise.
You see, it is not the culture's responsibility to make you happy, it is yours. The culture is the culture... and you can be happy in any culture if and when you learn how to listen to reality only.
And that is what we practice, that is what we learn in the Playground.
Want to learn it? No one else teaches it and produces results... talking about it isn't... talking about flying isn't... talking about sex isn't...
So join the Playground and start learning to DO the doing.