But when you observe their behavior, everything points to the fact that that is a pretense.
Why would anyone pretend that? Ultimately that is an expensive pretense… like the boy’s you cried ‘wolf’. Ultimately people stop believing you, and only people who are engaged in the same pretense will.
How do you know what you really want?
Simple: you observe yourself, jot down how much time and attention you give to each thing that occupies your day, and do it for a week.
What you want will stand out: that is what you give the most time to.
My number one goals are to get better at business and get better at understanding people… that is my business… understanding people.
So I spend the most time reading… reading books that gently teach me business and people.
In my particular case, I have 3-4 favorite prolific thriller/sci-fi writers whose writing does both. Not in a pontificating way like business books, non-fiction, but in a gentle: observe, see what they are really doing way.
And an occasional non-fiction… The Email Players newsletter, and the ‘no’ book by Jim Camp. Occasionally. I can only take an hour a week of those.
And I read my teacher’s entertaining writing, he is also the one whom I pay for the Email Players newsletter.
He writes gentle, non shoving it down your throat emails, every day, some days 3, and they are the first thing I read every day. If it were teaching, I would not.
This morning I had a chat with a dude who has a PhD in sociology, but he drives old people like me to lunch and shopping, in the normal times, which these aren’t. So he is assigned to call all his ‘fares’… and chat, and give them information on how Covid scams are, etc.
He expects to have the upper hand… after all he is a PhD. But I don’t respect ranks… so I have different conversations with him, in which I often tell him what I see he should do, like apologize to some people whom he consistently forgot to pick up… I am one of them, but I don’t need his apology… in my world apology attempts to buy you the right to do it again.
As an empath I ‘hear’ that he hates being told what to do. He wants to be the boss… even if it is a boss in a community van.
If you don’t want to hear what other people have to say, you’ll never grow.
I have students who want to own and run their business, but don’t know much about business.
Why? My hunch is they think it is easy. Or they think what they produce and sell is more important than knowing how to create, design, structure, and build a business.
They remind me of the people who brought to me their drawings of the house they wanted to build. They said: I just want you to stamp it… the municipality needs an architect’s stamp on it. But don’t change anything.
They remind me of my landlord who designed and built the whole change in this house I am renting, that leaks and falls apart, the walls peeling… It doesn’t bother me, by the way… I am built that way, but he, in his arrogance, doesn’t even know, not even now, that things need to be designed, and built properly. And it takes five years to learn that in school, and many years practice.
And that is the truth about business too.
I found this sentence in one of the horoscopes by Rob Brezsny, that fits here like the missing piece of a jigsaw puzzle:
Prepare — not to actually take the leap, but rather make yourself ready for the leap.
But if you are not putting in the time to prepare for the leap, then you are fully sh*t, and you’ll never get to the end result you say you want.
When I check what you read…
When I check what you do with your time…
What am I going to find? Inauthenticity, I guess. A huge gap between what you say and what you do.
By the way: this doesn’t only apply to owning a business. This applies to your health, to your money, to your career, to your relationships, even to raising your vibration. Raising your integrity. Your authenticity, your intelligence. Everything.
Come to find out the truth about yourself. The truth will set you free but first it will piss you off.
What’s the truth about you?
My whole methodology is to go to the invisible layers, the invisible movers and shakers of your behavior… and point them out, reveal them, so you can change the low lying parts of the iceberg, so the visible behavior changes on its own accord.