What do I intend to leave behind as my legacy?

Please email me if you find a typo or something unclear. Thank you. Sophie sophie@yourvibration.com

You live a sheltered life. Either restricted to a small area of the world physically, or to a small area of the world experientially.

So you, just like your cone of vision would predict, have a very narrow slice of reality (the pizza pie) ever seen, heard of, played in, experienced.

One of my 67 step coaching clients says in her reports, on average 10 times each report ‘Wow! I have never thought of that’. ‘I have never considered that’. ‘Hm, I’ve never heard that before’.

Each time she says that her slice of pizza becomes just a little bit bigger.

The size of that slice, the slice that you know that you know is going to be instrumental to living a life you love, a life you live powerfully.

Through about a 100 principles, stories, the 67 step coaching program takes you out of your tiny slice of heaven or hell, and gives you elbow room to play bigger. Better. With more understanding, with more awareness, with more success.

And like a good book that is worth reading, the series of audios is worth listening and pondering about many times… until you can TEACH it.

I myself did listen to all 67 audios for three and a half years, and the only reason I stopped, because I started to do the same with another audio, ‘The Art of Hunting Humans‘.

People who enlarge their world enough cannot be duped, not by others, not by their ‘little voice’…

If you do the program the way it is meant to be done you become the kind of person who can be coached, because life will occur to you as a opportunity, and you to yourself:

Like a musical instrument you can tune.

So what is the way to do the program that gets you that result:

  1. you allow each audio to take you around and show you life and principles in an area of life…
  2. You map what you hear. The principles, map them on your life, on your knowledge, on your experience, on your memes to allow the new knowledge to see them differently (this is the most important step, see below ‘clumps’.)
  3. You get into the habit of reading things worth reading, and read a lot. All that may prepare you to be coached.
How not to do it:
  • I never would have thought, but it is possible to do anything like it’s homework. It ‘needs to’ get done. You ‘have to’ do it.
  • The goal is to get it over with.
  • There is a fallacy, a mistaken belief that it will work without you working it. Even in AA they say: it works if you work it! Meaning: not by itself.

It’s the same with everything. Classes, books, private coaching. It doesn’t work by itself. Without you ‘working it’ nothing works.

If you are one of the people who has that belief, even if only to some degree, and most do, you have never gotten to the level where you are actually coachable.

That is the curse of a coach. Therapist’s interest is different. They just want you to feel better enough so you come back for another session where you can feel better… again.

But I am not a therapist, and using me as such is misusing me…

Back to the program: at a certain point, and that is different for everyone, you start to feel an uplifting energy, a sudden desire to DO SOMETHING.

The program has given you many of the tools you can use to become worth a damn.

Knowledge won’t make you worth a damn… you need to use that knowledge for something that creates value… i.e. is productive.

It is when you use that newfound knowledge for something that makes something. That making, the process, gives you satisfaction and fulfillment. That newfound satisfaction and fulfillment allows for your relationships to work, time to enjoy and maintain good health and vigor.

  • This program is not business coaching.
  • It is not health coaching.
  • It is not relationship coaching.
  • Yeah, it is still prep school…

What you are going to use it for is your choice, not mine.

Imagine that you want to become a medical doctor.

Prep school for a doctor wannabe is getting knowledgeable in biology, chemistry. And get volunteer/work experience in dealing with patients, work in a lab… etc.

Here is what I found on Google this morning:

  • Decide on medicine. …
  • Complete undergraduate science requirements.
  • Get volunteer/work experience in health-related fields.
  • Consider a broad pre-med course selection.
  • Develop staff/faculty advisors.
  • Prepare for the MCAT.
  • Take the MCAT exam.

To create a viable business, to become a marketer, to become able to sell what you create, you need a lot of capacities opened, lots of knowledge, lots of skills, and…

360 degree view of the world.

  • 20 capacities are needed to be activated to become a medical doctor.
  • 10, to become a marketer. There is an overlap.

And if you want to be doctor who creates and runs your own business… you need a whole lot more… that you need to be self-managing to acquire.

But you think that marketing is easy because people don’t learn marketing in school… no entry exam, no grades… just life and a lot of learning and even more failing in the field.

Out of 10 ideas I test, only one succeed.

You don’t know what you don’t know. It’s 99% of all knowledge that you don’t know that you don’t know… and unfortunately you have no instrument other than failures to find out.

Experience is a great teacher, but the learning is expensive. Life, limbs, fame and fortune are the prices. So intelligent people learn from and through others’ examples… so they don’t have to have all the failures they would have without that learning.

So what if you are intelligent? Where and how do you learn?

Two programs I offer, the 67 step coaching and the 53 invisibles are like premed for doctors:  prepare you to be trainable.

It will take you a lot of work. I promise.

Your choice is this:

  • to be a dilettante, perpetually seeking, betting on instant riches and big red buttons… or
  • become a reliable, count-on-able competent human who can and will succeed. That process is what we call self-actualization. And the emphasis is on the word: Self. DIY.

Here is a little aside: I teach that if you look at what’s in front of you will emerge eventually, if you keep on looking long enough.

I lied. Not intentionally. I didn’t know.

But if you have too little you CAN see, it can show up and won’t be seen by you.

So what’s missing?

Humans live life, see reality, see everything, including feelings through words.

If you don’t know what it is your eyes see, you have no words, you have no recognition, that visual information gets filtered out… as if it weren’t there.

Your eyes see it, but you don’t.

This is where the world divides itself to the so-called lucky ones, and the ones that envy them.

The ‘lucky ones’ have more distinctions, they have words for more phenomena than the ones that envy them.

And then there are the ultra-perceptives who can connect the dots better than most anyone, the ‘positive deviants‘…

The more a person has connected what they saw, what they learned to their already established and tested knowledge, the more they can see to connect in the future.

I have observed a 67 step client: she started to refer to previous steps and what they said as late as around step 40.

So for a ‘normal’ person that is when the ‘clumping’ of knowledge begins… instead of each step is heard and promptly forgotten because it isn’t connected to anything else.

When a person has the homework attitude ‘just get it done’, this process, the ‘clumping’ doesn’t happen.

Clumping is the prerequisite for seeing and for connecting the dots.

I have noticed that when marketing coaches speak, now I can connect the dots. I can take actions on some of the ideas or the instructions.

Yes, I have become more coachable.

What is coaching in that last sentence?

I’ve watched this Korean series on Netflix where the main character spent most of his life playing baduk, the game of go, a board game, as strategic as chess. Also played competitively.

In the Netflix series we see him as an employee in a Korean corporation.

He almost instantly sees more than the other people around him, regardless of their experience or education level.

Why? because he has this continent-size clump of strategy for gaining advantage, strategy for winning.

He started at kindergarten age. His ten coaches helped him develop muscle memory, with a hands on approach.

Anything worth learning is like baduk (the go game),

  • you need to become the right person, and
  • you need to learn the right moves for the right reason.

50% mindset, 50% muscle memory.

When I say muscle memory, I could also say ‘clumps’… where the actions become instinctual.

  • I have learned that unless you have a lot of knowledge in your long term memory, i.e. you have clumps, you will try to use your RAM, random access memory. RAM is too small… and you’ll drop most of the information… it doesn’t stick to any clumps and you never amount to much.

If your desire is to become more than a cog in some machine someone else built, you need to learn new things, and retain them.

Developing your clumps, having a network of knowledge is mandatory to learn enough new things, as many new things as it takes to start a business, or to change your career.

If you are someone who has coasted in life because you are ‘brilliant’, or talented, you probably didn’t develop your clumps, so you never actually learned to learn.

  • You read books and you don’t remember.
  • You listen to audios, and you don’t remember.

Your first job will be to connect the new information to something you have already established…

…so you can have clumps to hang stuff on, so the new stuff can stick to something that is already there.

You’ll hate it, because it is somewhat tedious. It is work. All ‘brilliant’ people hate work. But if you want more than what you can now have, you must.

And then, when you have the equipment, the clumps and the habit to attach the new stuff to clumps, you can be coached to be a consistent winner.

Our young Baduk playing hero in that Korean movie, had to quit competing at the stage where he had the abilities, he had the equipment, but didn’t have the money to live on…

  • I have never met a violin virtuoso who played the violin as a hobby.
  • I have never met a brilliant marketer who did marketing on the side.

Here, again, Alex Hormozi says the best:

5.  Most Champions do not have something that you do not; they lack something that you have

For many people what prevents them from amounting to much is their insistence to do everything other people seem to do: play computer games, clean the house every day, shop every day, watch television, youtube videos, drive their kids everywhere, look at their phone every minute, fret, cook, whatever things other people seem to do all the time… And they look so happy on Fakebook!

That is the path to not amounting to much. You can have a job. You can be relatively healthy. You can have a family that works.

But to make a name for yourself… that is a 10 times bigger job…

You need to know what you aspire for. Ahead of time.

  • I always knew that I wanted to stand out. To be extraordinary.
  • I always knew that I wasn’t going to be satisfied to be just one of many.

I chose my path early… this part: standing out.

So I quit everything where I could not be number one or number two, the way famed General Electric CEO Jack Welch knew, who sold off all divisions that he didn’t have the potential to be number one or number two, and heavily invested into the ones that he kept.

I allowed many abilities, many ‘talents’ to atrophy for the sake of talents I can hone to become number one or number two with.

  • Music
  • Languages
  • Pantomime
  • Dance
  • Mathematics
  • Architecture

For me being extraordinary wasn’t a what. It wasn’t a goal. It was a how. Not a who. A how. A how to live, how to do, how to think, how to see, how to love, how to receive, how to everything.

So my self-image is NOT ‘I am extraordinary!’. No. My self-image can change when it needs to be changed… But whatever it is, HOW I am going to be that is what my how is: extraordinary.

Putting the extra into the ordinary.

I made creating empowering contexts my number one area of expertise.

Your ability to invent context depends on your integrity number, the relationship between you and your word. Mine is 80%. I have never measured anyone’s integrity higher than 10%. Most people have 1-3%…

Creation of context is a skill, a lot like the skill to play the violin. You can be so-so in it, or you can become a Paganini.

You don’t need to become a Paganini of creating contexts to be successful in life… but you need to become good.

All 67 steps are context creation, by the way. You just cannot see it. Why? Because context is invisible. And so are principles.

Everything looks different when the context changes.

Magical. Without the magic wand.

This coming Saturday we’ll work with one kind of context: the self-image.

Your self-image has been limiting you. Limiting you to be ordinary, limiting you to live a small life, to fix what was wrong, to lord over others, and to be down on yourself.

In one word: your self-image doesn’t work. It has given you a life you don’t love. A life where you are not going to do the best, where you can become all you can become.

In Saturday’s workshop we’ll start exploring the area. Like most everything, the only method that works is iterative.

So what we invent won’t be effective for long. But it will take you to a place where we can invent another one, that won’t be effective long, but will take you to a place where you can invent another one… So it’s an iterative process… each step builds on the previous steps.

Depending on your machine, you have a cycle that you want to know.

In self-image I have a month long cycle. Like Alex Hormozi says in his video, the cycle has phases. (failure leads to learning. learning leads to success. success leads to complacency. complacency leads to failure)

You invent a new self-image.

First you work on it, because it’s unfamiliar. They success comes: a new view of life, a new way of living. This is the success phase. Then comes complacency that leads to failure… You are back to square one. You are unhappy, but manage to create a new self-image… and repeat the cycle.

The ART is to create a new self-image before complacency sets in.

For me it is on the 25th day… For A. it’s the second day. For M. it’s the tenth day. For B. it’s the third day.

The sign that it will drop off, that you are going into complacency is counter intuitive. You’ll be the happiest you. Proudest. Certain that you got it. That is the sign, that is how you know…

You want to get good at creating… so you don’t spend a lot of your time doing it. Learning to muscletest accurately can be a boon. Your mind will want to come up with stuff that will make you remain the same.

So my intention is to help you invent a new self-image… but also to teach you how it works, so you can learn to do it yourself.

And we’ll also muscletest your cycle… So you never go into failure again, unless you simply forget your cycle…

If I don’t know you, our interaction will be longer, because I need to know you enough for me to assist you. But you are welcome nevertheless.

I intend to leave this process as my legacy… together with the invisibles, and the 67 step process.

So even when I am gone you have me in your life, assisting you to become all you can become. So you can be coached by someone else, still alive.

Learn this process this Saturday

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Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

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