Emotional toughness, resilience can help you getting there

emotional resilience toughness high TLBDo you hate to learn new things because every time you do, it somehow tells you that you have been wrong? Or not enough? Not good enough?

Well, toughen up princess…

But otherwise it’s normal. I know.

As a child I lived across the street from my elementary school.

I was nearly seven when I went to school, I was born September 4. My mother held me back because I was so tiny. My brother was two years older.

On the first day of school…

….I remember crossing the street, my hand in my mother’s hand… that is the only time, by the way, that I remember her holding my hand.

I said to her: I don’t want to go to school. I don’t know how to read and write.

To which she said (luckily): That is why you go to school… to learn.

emotional resilienceThe normal state of a human is to not know. Yet. The human brain is designed to learn… humans are learning machines… and yet, we always thing that we should already know, or alternatively, we think we already know everything.

I guess that is why when I ask a questions from many students, they go to their minds to search for what’s there… instead of simply saying: I don’t know. I can tell the difference between real thinking and searching the mind, because I can feel where the activity is going on.

If you don’t know, you won’t find it in the mind. And yet you search there…

Humility is to know that you don’t know… instead of pretending to search of it in the mind. You don’t know… normal. But…

No matter where you are at, you are almost always in an ess… an evolutionary stable place, or homeostasis. Really.

Humans are a lot like the Daruma doll… always return to that stable place… whether that stable place is good for you or not… This to the degree that I have discovered that even muscletesting is considering that ess, that homeostasis as the goal… so recently I made a deal with Source that when I muscletest something, the goal should be growth, real well-being, not homeostasis, mere survival.

If you want to grow, if you want to evolve, if you want more out of life, you need to, you MUST toughen up and go through a long series of unbalanced and uncomfortable states… that are like steps on a staircase, can take you to that better place.

Unfortunately, if you have a TLB 1… i.e. you can’t handle anything unpleasant, you won’t and you can’t. (TLB stands for Twitchy Little Bastard, or mental toughness. Mental toughness is the ability to resist, manage and overcome doubts, worries, concerns and circumstances that prevent you from succeeding, or excelling at a task or towards an objective or a performance outcome that you set out to achieve. And although mental toughness sounds real good, I think it is really emotional toughness and resiliency is what is required for a higher TLB… )

How do you recognize that you are a TLB 1?

Too many ways to list… one of them: you argue. Another is: you start something with enthusiasm and get discouraged. You continue be needy to be liked. You continue dreaming of results without effort, without work. Thinking that being a ‘big fish’ in a puddle is the pathway to a big business, behaving as if every mistake, wrong step, not knowing were the end of life… death… etc.

My TLB is 70 on a scale of 1-100… It’s very high, and yet when I found out what I hadn’t known this afternoon… I cried… It hurt… I felt like a total loser. I felt like I am no good… Regret. Yeah… And it wasn’t even a BIG thing, or was it?

What did I find out, you ask?

I was at a designer presentation, where the woman, the designer kept on talking about how you want the guest, the customer, the visitor to feel.

And it occurred to me that it is the same when you write an article: you want to decide ahead of time how you want the reader to feel… And I have never asked that question… it never even occurred to me that I could.

So now that I am asking that question, I am looking. And I am seeing that how I want you to feel is hopeful. I want you to feel that if you do your part, the future will be better. If you do your part… not automatically. Automatically that is not true.

Of course unconsciously, and unwittingly that is where I have taken my students, but have I had THAT as the context, as the goal or a goal, that would have made some of my actions conscious.

I would have done what is taught in marketing: let your buyers have a big early win… I didn’t know how to do that, although I could have… But I never asked the question what is a big early win for MY buyers.

In some of products an early win was ‘normal’… The Soaring Method… huge early win. The Unconditional Love Activator… huge early win. The 4 daily tasks method (Hero program) huge early win. Attachment pulling, including the pulling of the anchor to doom: huge early win. Predatory Genes adjustment: huge early win.

But many of my courses and products did not have an obvious early win. So they needed a higher TLB to ultimately win.

But no matter where you are in life, if you do what is yours to do, if you do what I teach you to do, you’ll have a big win… eventually. The future is going to be better, one little win at a time.

Unfortunately, every time you learn something more to do that you didn’t do or didn’t even know to do, you’ll feel like sh!t for a little bit… just like I did. And you need a higher than 1 TLB to stay in the work.

You know who you are… you stayed the course. You know who you aren’t… you always went back to zero…

How do you grow your TLB?

You can only grow your TLB gradually. There are no jumps in reality. So you can safely conclude: I went through at least 70 unpleasant experiences and stayed the course, to get to 70 TLB.

Only going through unpleasant experiences will grow your TLB.

One of my students writes:

Yesterday was difficult.

Monday morning I was contemplating my trigger for greed, how it related to my doom and whether the ‘I am not good enough’ was accurate. In that contemplating, I saw ‘I am too weak, I am not strong enough’ and that seems to fit better. It hit me pretty hard.

Almost all of my classes, short or long, are designed to raise your TLB… because they all deal with bad news about you.

But the hardest of them all is the Inner Authority course… where I make you feel the 48 Bach energies, all unpleasant, and I ask you to expose yourself to them. The energy that you innately resonate with feels the worst, but none feel pleasant.

The energies are homeopathic in nature: they first make the innate feeling (the symptom) stronger and then they diminish it. If you cannot bear the stronger feeling, you won’t get the benefits.

Sellers of the Bach Flower Remedies are, of course, clueless… they don’t know this.

When someone starts using the Heaven on Earth, they will have a few days, a week, maybe even longer where they will feel worse. Healing crisis it’s called, and it is a reason to rejoice. But most people quit instead.

Another one of my students writes:

It’s been a hard few days since the Bach sounds…one day l cried 5 times. I can’t feel them but l feel bad. But l am sticking with it.

Thank you for going through the discomfort of recording them.

Yeah, I procrastinated for three whole days, or was it four? before I gathered enough TLB to record the energies.

Especially the first one, Agrimony… ugh. It is unhappy and miserable masked with cheerfulness… You have to feel the unhappy and the miserable… and if you are willing, if you can be with it, even if you cry, it increases your TLB, your mental and emotional resilience.

But it is the same with every energy…

Is there another way? I think this is the fastest… and the least amount of involvement.

I will record in short audios all the 48 energies by Sunday. I have recorded already five.

How do you use them?

I recommend putting one audio on an mp3 player and loop it… the recording is only a few seconds long, and you want your body to have time to catch up… play it 4-5 maybe even 10 minutes at a time. Feel what you feel. Keep on playing the same audio, until you do feel. No pain… no gain.

Some of you are so dead, so closed, so recalcitrant, so resistant that it will take you a long time to come even a little bit alive.

When you feel, feel it enough for it to reach its crescendo, and then go lower and go away.

Consider it a meditation. Do it when you feel safe…


Get all 48 Bach Energies on my mobile app
You can add the 48 audios on a micro sd card (chip), and/or your Bach Profile in the shopping cart.

PS: As I emphasized above, the Bach Energies are homeopathic in nature, i.e. they heal by matching what you have.

In regular homeopathic medicine, for example if you have nausea, the energy of the homeopathic remedy causes you have MORE nausea, so you can get rid of it… Counter intuitive, isn’t it?

quartz crystal dreadThis morning I asked an interesting question. Back some 20 years ago I lived with a dude who believed in lots of things, including crystals. He gave me a big quartz crystal as a gift. It promptly made me ill… hurt like hell…

I today can identify the feeling of #41 Bach Energy: Liana: expecting/dreading something painful. The most frequent fear you experience. From my history it is obviously the fear of being discarded (the opposite of love!!!)

This prompted me to ask if all the crystals are homeopathic when used by humans, and the answer was yes.

But that is not how they are sold…

Could carrying around a big quartz crystal be useful for me? You mean before it kills me? And I mean literally kill me… at least that is how it feels. Muscletest says: no.

Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar